


Whispers in the Dark

by Krynn_Evergreen



Category: Original Work
Genre: Abduction, Begging, Blood and Injury, Confinement, Dark, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Escape, Gangs, Gunshot Wounds, Humiliation, Illegal Activities, Knifeplay, M/M, Male Slash, Master/Pet, Murder, Psychological Torture, Restraints, Torture
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:47:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 22
Words: 69,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29468952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Krynn_Evergreen/pseuds/Krynn_Evergreen
Summary: 21 year old Bryson is in the process of moving from British Columbia to Alberta, Canada when he is abducted from a rest stop along the HWY. His captors, three older men who were just released from prison, take him to a secluded cabin in Northern Alberta where his true anguish is just about to begin...Disclaimer: This story is a work of fiction, and all characters and activities within the story are completely made up. Story does contain graphic, sexual content with rape and torture. If you are uncomfortable with this, then please do not read.
Comments: 15
Kudos: 40





	1. Hitting the Road

Saying goodbye to my mom and dad was harder than I thought it would be. Turning the key, I started the engine of my car and shifted the gear from park to reverse. I looked out the front windshield one last time, waving to my parents before turning my eyes to the rear-view mirror. Easing my foot off the break, the car moved down the driveway and turned onto the side street. I caught a brief glance at my mother, who was wiping away tears she thought she had been able to contain. My chest felt heavy as I shifted the gear into drive and drove away.

Abbotsford, British Columbia was mayhem in the summer, and today was no different. The roads were congested as I worked my way through mid-afternoon traffic and merged onto the TransCanada HWY that would lead me straight East to Calgary, Alberta. It was August, and school started in two weeks. I would have time to move into my new apartment and get acquainted with the city before the start of classes. It was a two-day drive for me, although many people managed to do it in one. Personally, I didn’t want to risk driving tired through the night.

Just after my 21st birthday in May, I had received my acceptance letter from the university of Calgary, which was a pretty big deal. Sure, I could have gone to one of the several universities here in the lower mainland, but adventure and independence was something I had been craving for a long time.

However, right now, feeling that lump in my throat as I tried to focus on the road, I wondered if I had made the right choice. I was leaving my friends and family behind to live in a new city all on my own. I reminded myself that it wasn’t going to be forever. In a couple months I would be coming back for Christmas break.

I leaned forward and turned on the radio. I had at least a five-hour drive to Revelstoke, where I planned on spending the night in a cheap motel. It was hot, almost thirty degrees Celsius, or eighty-six degrees Fahrenheit if you happen to be American. The air conditioning in my car wasn’t the greatest, so I had the windows partially rolled down, letting the warm wind whip through the car.

Two and a half hours later I found myself at a gas station in Kamloops. The temperature here was even higher as I opened my car door and stepped outside. My back had started to cramp from sitting for so long, and I leaned on the car and stretched before moving to the pump.

Gas prices were always high during peak tourist season. The dollar forty-five a litre was a wallet killer. Sucking it up, I prepaid and shoved the nozzle into my gas tank and let the dollars climb.

When the pump clicked off, I returned the nozzle and climbed back into the car. It was now getting close to six pm and I pulled out a sandwich and opened a can of pop I had in my car before getting back on the hwy. The drive from Kamloops to Revelstoke was boring to say the least. Despite the amazing mountain vistas, I found myself wanting to get there faster, however, end of summer congestion on the HWY meant some simpleton a few cars ahead of me was holding everyone up.

When a passing lane presented itself, I stepped on the pedal, feeling my engine roar in protest. I didn’t care though, I needed to get ahead of the camper which was barely doing the speed limit.

As the end of the passing lane came up, I slipped in front and thanked the stars. Now I felt like I was actually going somewhere.

Another two and a half hours later, I drove into Revelstoke. It was a little town at the foot of the Rocky Mountains. Steep peaks rose up on each side of the town; a sight to behold. Even in late summer, there were still some white snow crests adorning the tallest mountain peaks.

Looking at the clock on the dashboard, it read 8:54 pm. Pulling into the parking lot of the motel I had wanted to stay at for the night, I noticed it was full. The no vacancy sign shone bright red from the lobby window. Frustrated and tired, I turned down the main street of Revelstoke instead, looking for another place to stay.

It quickly became apparent that I was going to be out of luck. I should have phoned and made a reservation before leaving home. Stopping at another hotel that said no vacancy, I went inside anyway.

The lobby was quiet, but a woman came out to greet me as the door jingled.

“I see you have no vacancy, but do you know of any places that might still have rooms available?” I asked, hoping the clerk might have some better insight for me.

“Sorry, by this time everyone is going to be booked here. We usually fill up by seven this evening. If I were you, I would phone ahead and see if there is vacancy in Golden. It is only about an hour and a half from here.”

I tried to hide my disappointment as I thanked her for the advice and walked back out to my car. Pulling out my cellphone, I googled some hotels in Golden, having been left with no other option. A dingy looking motel popped up on my search, and I phoned the number listed. After several rings, a gruff voice answered the phone.

“Hi, my name is Bryson, I was wondering if you had any vacancy? I just need a single bed for the night.”

“Your lucky, we only have two rooms left. I will book you in, but I will need your credit card number to hold the room.”

I fished the wallet out of my back pocket and thumbed through the cards. Finding the right one, I read him the numbers.

“Thanks Bryson, we will see you when you get here.”

Hanging up, I turned the car back on. I still had plenty of fuel, so I decided to drive straight back out onto the HWY.

As the sun slipped behind the mountains, twilight quickly descended into darkness. It was a slower drive in the dark as I drove cautiously up the winding, tight turns leading up into the mountains.

Twenty minutes later, I found myself wishing I had stopped to use the washroom in town before getting back on the HWY. When the next rest stop came into view maybe 20 minutes later, I pulled off the road and pulled up to the bathrooms and parked next to the only other vehicle present, a black SUV. Throwing my door open, I quickly got out and walked up to the outhouse and waited for the guy already inside to vacate.

When the door creaked open, I walked in after him and did my business. Outhouses always grossed me out, so I spent as little time in there as possible.

Pushing the door back open, I let it slam shut behind me, the bang breaking the silence of the night. Three men now stood near the hood of the SUV, their grazes turning in my direction as I walked back to my car. One of the guys raised his voice, inviting me over in a friendly manner. I was reluctant to start driving again right away, so I changed direction and approached the men.

“Where are you headed?” one of them asked. It was dark out, but despite the lack of light to illuminate his features the man appeared to be in his late thirties; he was tall and muscular with short facial hair.

“I am on my way to Calgary.” I replied casually, before returning the question, “How about you guys?”

“We are headed out to Alberta as well.” He replied, taking another drag of his cigarette before dropping it on the ground and putting it out with his heel.

“Are you from Calgary?” Another guy asked, the youngest of the three, but no doubt older than me.

“No, I am moving there for school. I’m actually from Abbotsford.” I replied, not minding the small talk.

“I grew up in Coquitlam but spent lots of time in Abbotsford with friends,” the younger man said, jutting out his hand at the same time, “Nice to meet you. I am Ethen.” He appeared to be in his mid-twenties with short, dark facial hair and a closely shaven head. “Bryson.” I replied, shaking his hand briefly with a firm grip.

“This is Devan,” Ethen said, introducing the older man who had spoken first. “And this is Quinten.”

Quinten hadn’t said anything yet, but he acknowledged me by nodding his head in greeting. Quinten was clean shaven, and maybe in his early thirties or late twenties. His body was lean and muscular behind the wife beater he wore. He didn’t seem interested in engaging in meaningless chit chat.

I turned my attention back to Ethen and Devan, “so, where in Alberta are you guys headed?” I asked with mild curiosity.

“Northern Alberta actually, Devan has a hunting cabin he inherited recently. Looking forward to some good times out in the bush.” He chuckled.

“Nice.” I replied. “I assume you’re going hunting then?”

“We might go deer hunting this fall with some of the people my dad had been good friends with.” Devan replied, “but honestly, it will be a low priority. We’re just looking to relax, have some beers and barbeque. We don’t have too much planned.”

“What are you taking in school?” Ethen asked.

“Just some general first year courses. I’m not entirely decided on what direction to take for a career. Maybe business management or engineering.”

“Well, good luck on your endeavours Bryson.”

“Thanks, you as well. Have a good time at the cabin.” I said, “I better get going. I still plan on getting to Calgary tonight.”

“It’s only a few more hours, have a good drive.”

Walking away from the three men, I circled behind the SUV and headed to my car. I leaned against the driver’s door checked my cellphone messages before getting in. The men by the SUV carried on with their conversation, their voices low but animated. I wondered vaguely what they were conversing about as I punched the password into my cell. Not entirely unexpected, I had no service, which meant no new messages. I opened the door and tossed my phone back into the car onto the passenger’s seat. I was about to get in when I heard footsteps approaching behind me. Turning around, I saw the three guys casually walking around the front of my car.

“What’s up?” I asked, thinking they might need something.

None of the guys said anything as they approached, and suddenly I felt an odd level of discomfort as I stood outside my open car door. The hairs on the back of my neck prickled with unease.

Devan came to a stop across from me as Ethen positioned himself to my right, and Quinten to my left. I didn’t move a muscle as I waited for something to happen. For something to make sense.

“Okay guys, if you need something just ask.” I laughed nervously. I felt an immediate need to jump into my car and lock the doors, but I hesitated, not trusting my instincts.

Devan spoke first, his voice low, dangerous. “You are going to come with us Bryson.”

“Huh?” I asked, taken aback by his statement. I knew my expression must have been just as puzzled as my voice. I felt a wave of anxious dread wash through my body, it numbed my mind and made my heart race. “I’m just going to go now.” I said, positing myself to quickly get into the car. If I could just jump inside and lock the doors, I would be okay.

I didn’t make it more than half a step when Quinten grabbed my left arm. Instinctively, I tried to pull back and push him away with my free hand. “Get the fuck away from me!” I yelled out, angry and frightened. I knew my voice betrayed my feelings. Trying to pull out of Quinten’s grasp did nothing for me, the man had expected me to put up a resistance and his grip on my arm was bruising. As I focused on Quinten’s hold, I lost track of the other two guys momentarily. Ethen capitalized on my lack of awareness and was suddenly grabbing at my right arm, trying to twist my hand behind my back. “Fuck off!” I yelled again, twisting my body, trying to loosen both of their grips. As I struggled in their arms, Devan punched me in the face. My head whipped to the side, pain exploding from my temple and left eye.

For a moment I stopped struggling as I absorbed the impact. I had never been punched in the face before, and it rattled me to my core. Shaking my head, I tried to clear my thoughts. I started kicking out at Ethen as I recovered, but Devan punched me in the stomach next. I buckled forward, unable to control my reaction. As soon as my body started to sag, I found myself being forcefully pushed to the ground. My face was crushed into the dirt and rocks as someone held my head down. Their weight on my back was making it hard to breathe. I tried to suck in quick rapid breaths as my chest heaved. I instinctively wanted to cry out for help but couldn’t get enough air in my lungs to sufficiently yell.

“Hurry, get the ties from the car.” I heard Devan say in a strained voice.

“On it.” Quinten replied, his footsteps retracting to the SUV.

I needed to get away now. The pain in my stomach from the hit didn’t register anymore as panic gripped me and adrenaline took over. I struggled against Ethen and Devan as they practically sat on top of me, crushing my body. I was able to get my chest off the ground just enough to scream out, “Let me go!”

“Shut your fucking mouth.” Devan said harshly. I didn’t give a shit if he wanted me to shut up. 

Twisting in the gravel, my biceps strained as I tried to free my arms. I was using every ounce of power in my body to try and get the two men off me. Despite my efforts, their strength surpassed my own. I felt completely helpless.

“You’re a strong little shit, aren’t you?” Ethen mocked, fighting to keep me down. “Hurry up Quinten!”

“Got them!” I heard the man yell back a moment later. The crunching of gravel under foot got louder as Quinten ran back to us. “Move, I need to see his wrists” he said, bending over me and the two men.

As soon as I felt Ethen and Devan change their grip, I yanked my hands free in a violent push of desperation. It didn’t help my situation however, as I couldn’t push myself up in time before an arm wrapped around my throat in a tight embrace.

Suddenly, I found myself suffocating as my attacker squeezed his arm tighter around my throat, my neck in the crook of his elbow. I struggled more, my attention only focused on the deadly grip around my neck and the building pressure in my head.

Whoever had their arm around me in a chokehold suddenly shifted position, giving themselves more leverage. I felt myself rapidly becoming lightheaded despite my will to fight.

“I almost got him.” Devan said.

I struggled in his arms for a few more moments, before the energy left my limbs, and I slipped away into unconsciousness.


	2. Taken

Consciousness slowly crept back to me, my senses turning on one at a time. My stomach muscles were sore, and my face hurt like hell. Opening my eyes, the first thing I saw was blackness. It was still nighttime, and it took a few moments for my eyes to adjust to the grey light filtering through the tinted windows. I was laying on my stomach, my face resting on the fabric of the SUV’s trunk carpet. My neck was kinked from my head being positioned sideways for so long.

The vibrations of the vehicle and the momentum of turning corners told me that we were heading somewhere I didn’t want to go.

My arms were tied behind my back and I could feel that the zip ties around my wrists were cutting off blood flow to my hands. I gingerly twitched my fingers. The tingling numbness intensified into painful throbs as I rotated my wrists to bring back some circulation.

Despite my urge to kick and scream, I breathed slowly and kept quiet. The vehicle was deathly silent, and I didn’t dare be the first to break it.

Time seemed to take on a morbid slowness as I laid in the trunk, thoughts racing through my mind. I had so many questions and yet I did not dare utter a single word; I didn’t know what would happen once my captors knew I was awake.

After what seemed like an infinite amount of time, I heard Devan’s deep voice from the front of the vehicle, “Quinten, check on the kid.” My pulse jumped and I felt a cocktail of adrenaline and dread flow through my veins as I heard Quinten shuffle around in the backseat to look down at me. I couldn’t help but meet his gaze, my eyes projecting unconcealed fear. “He’s awake.”

Silence enveloped the vehicle again and I closed my eyes as Quinten turned away from me.

The vehicle began to slow down a short while later, and before long the SUV turned onto what sounded like a dirt road as the smooth hum of pavement transitioned into the crunching of rocks under the tires. As the SUV pulled to a stop, the interior lights came on and the doors opened and closed. I shifted positions quickly. Using my head as a support against the floor of the trunk, I shuffled my knees under my stomach and push myself upright. I sat with my back pressed up against the trunk’s interior wall with my knees against my chest. It somehow made me feel less vulnerable than laying on my stomach.

My pulse was already racing by the time the guys moved to the back of the SUV. Someone said a few words and then the latch clicked unlocked and the hatch was lifted. My muscles tensed. I didn’t know what would be coming next. What I needed to prepare for.

The three men regarded me with expressions that ranged from serious to amused.

“What do you want?” I said, trying to sound tough, but my trembling voice betrayed me. The three guys chuckled like I had just made a joke. “I can give you all the money I have, just let me go.”

“We don’t want your money Bryson Mitchell.” Devan said, a smirk playing across his face. In the light cast off by the interior lights, I could see the man’s steal blue eyes boring into me. I shifted nervously under his gaze.

“How do you know my last name?” I questioned.

“We found your wallet.” He replied simply. 

Looking beyond the three men, I noticed we were pulled over on some unknown logging road, the HWY just out of sight.

“Let’s see what the kid looks like.” Quinten said, showing genuine interest in me for the first time.

“What do you mean?” I asked, not wanting to know the answer. Instead of saying anything, Ethen and Devan reached forward in an attempt to pull me out of the trunk. Both of them had a solid grip on my biceps as they tugged me forward. My instincts kicked in, and I used my legs to push back as my shoes found footholds on the inner ridge of the trunk’s entrance.

“Don’t touch me!” I screamed, true fear breaking through my facade.

When my foot slipped on the edge of the trunk, the guys roughly pulled me out and pushed me to my knees. With my hands tied behind my back, I didn’t have many options for trying to fight back against the three of them.

Quinten pulled a switchblade out of his back pocket as I twisted in Devan and Ethen’s grasp trying to break loose. “Stop struggling you idiot, or I will cut you.”

Quinten’s threat didn’t go unheard, and I stilled as he approached.

“What are you doing?” I said, this time with more resolve.

“We’re just going to take a peek. Chill out kid.” He said casually, winking at me. He knelt down on one knee and reached forward. His one hand clutched the collar of my shirt while he used the blade in his other hand to pierce the fabric. The knife was sharp, easily fraying the cotton fibers as he cut it from my body. I turned pale as I pictured what a knife that sharp could do to my flesh.

I started to shake as the rags of the t-shirt fell to the ground. Despite the warm night I was suddenly cold, and my skin prickled with goosebumps. “Please stop.” I said weakly, disgusting myself in the process. I had never felt so vulnerable in my life. I refused to acknowledge what their intentions could be.

“Mmm look at you Bryson.” Ethen said, rubbing his free hand down my chest towards my belly button. His firm fingers exploring the definition of my slim, slightly defined chest and abs. “You’re hot you know that?” He spoke into my ear. The sound of his low voice and heat of his breath on my face made me extremely uncomfortable, and not just physically. I was repulsed by him.

Quinten had a pleased look as he sat back on his haunches and watched Ethen touch me. “What do you think Devan? Is he a keeper?” My eyes suddenly flicked to Devan and our gazes met for a few seconds before I felt compelled to look away. “You bet. I like this puppy.”

“I am not a fucking puppy!” I spat without thinking, insulted by his words. Ethen’s hand became still on my bare chest. Looking up, I watched a smile creep over Devan’s face. I needed to be strong. I needed to show them they couldn’t get away with this. I would not be willing.

“Oh, but you are a puppy Bryson, and a young one at that. How old are you anyway? Twenty? Twenty-one?”

When I didn’t answer, Devan said dangerously, “When we ask you something, you answer. If I have to pry it out of you Bryson, you won’t like it. Best you do what you’re told till we’re done with you.”

“I -I’m twenty-one.” I decided it would be smarter to answer his questions and save my energy.

“See? that wasn’t so hard.”

I looked to the ground, no longer able to maintain eye contact with my captor. I was ashamed of myself, of this situation. 

“He’s going to be perfect; I can tell already.” Ethen said, his hand exploring my skin again. “There isn’t a single hair on your chest. You’re so smooth.” I shivered, cringing and twitching under his gingerly touch. I knew he was deliberately trying to make me uncomfortable and it was working. 

“He has blue eyes and blonde hair, your favourite Ethen.” Quinten said, still admiring whatever it was he saw in me.

A larger, rougher hand touched my shoulder and travelled down my back. “Your skin is like a blank sheet of paper Bryson, smooth and unmarked. That will change soon, I promise you.” Devan’s voice whispered in my ear.

“C’mon, I want to see the rest.” Ethen said suddenly, excited. “Let’s pick him up.”

“No! Please! Don’t do this!” I cried out as Devan and Ethen hoisted me up to my feet and held me firmly between them. I felt desperation building as Quinten brought his hands to the front of my jeans. I wasn’t going to just stand here and let them rob me of my dignity. I started squirming again and kicked my leg out viciously to try and hit Quinten. He was quick though, managing to sidestep out of my reach.

“Don’t play games with us Bryson.” Devan said in that dangerous tone again. I ignored him and said aggressively, “Fuck you! LET. ME. GO!” as I tried to push forward with all my strength. The skin on my arms was beyond sore as I struggled against them. Devan and Ethen must have come to some unspoken agreement because they both released their hold on me simultaneously. The unexpected lack of resistance sent me stumbling forward and I tripped, falling to the ground. Unable to brace my fall, my shoulder and face scraped harshly against the dirt and rocks. I winced as my skin stung from the cuts.

Before I could get up, Devan kicked me in my lower back, sending shooting pain up my spine. I cried out, and he kicked me again. Rolling away from him, I curled my knees against my body. “Please, stop!” I pleaded, surrendering to him.

“You don’t like getting hurt, do you Bryson?” Devan chided. “If you think getting kicked hurts, then you know nothing of pain.”

“I-I’ll behave.” I said fearfully.

“I somehow doubt that, but let’s try again, shall we?” He said, and I nodded in agreement. Devan looked to Ethen, “Let’s get him up.” The men grabbed my arms and hoisted me to my feet.

“Now, where were we?” Quinten mumbled gruffly, his hands coming down on the front of my pants again. With a quick tug, the top button of my jeans popped open. I continued to hold still as he undid my zipper before pulling my pants down with a tug. The night air met my bare legs as I stood between the three men. I no longer felt like a twenty-one-year-old man embarking on a journey of adulthood, but a weak, insecure boy who was about to be molested by freaks.

The only piece of clothing that protected my dignity was my black briefs. Instead of pulling them down right away, Quinten knelt in-front of me and pulled my shoes and socks off before getting rid of the pants that were crumpled around my ankles. I wished I could cover myself from their prying eyes and touch.

“He’s so lean, look at those tight muscles.” Quinten said, his hands traveling up my legs and back to my hips. I felt paralyzed with anxiety.

“I’m not gay.” I said softly, as if proclaiming this would somehow deter them.

“Oh? we will be your first then?” Devan stated with intrigue. If anything, I had just increased their level of satisfaction. I didn’t answer. I didn’t want to feed into their sick fucking fantasies.

Devan suddenly reached up, clutching my throat. “What did I say about answering when you’re asked a question?”

“Y-yes!” I mumbled quietly. “I have never been with a man.” Devan’s hand fell away from my throat as I answered the question.

Ethen whistled and Quinten raised his eyebrows.

“Looks like we scored good guys.” Devan laughed and slapped my ass.

“Please!” I pleaded again, “Don’t do this.”

“You sound so weak and hot when you talk like that puppy.” Devan whispered into my ear. “Keep on whining, it won’t save you.”

Quinten took hold of my briefs and was about to pull them down when, to my surprise, Ethen stopped him. “Hey, why don’t we hold off for now? I know what I said before, but let’s leave the finally for later.” He winked at Quinten. A flash of irritation appeared on the other man’s face, but he did pause to consider his companion’s request. Evidently deciding Ethen was right, Quinten released his hold on my underwear. I sagged against Devan and Ethen’s grasp in temporary relief. Whatever reason Ethen had for changing his mind, I was grateful.

“Stick him back in the trunk then. We can go past Walmart and pick up some supplies when we get into Calgary. They are open 24/7.” Quinten said.

I didn’t care what Quinten meant by supplies; I was just glad that they were not going to rape me right now. But they will later. Panic seized my chest at the thought of the three men each taking turns, abusing my body for their own pleasure. I was so shocked by my situation that I didn’t resist as they loaded me back into the trunk and shut the hatch. I silently complied, laying facedown once again as the vehicle started moving. It took every ounce of my willpower to keep the tears of frustration at bay.


	3. First Attempt

I must have fallen asleep at some point during the night, because when I woke up it was daylight and the vehicle was parked. I maneuvered my body into an upright position, shifting to bring my knees under me. It was awkward to do with my hands tied behind my back. Peering out the rear window I could see that we were pulled over a dirt road. The complete change of scenery took me by surprise. The mountains and trees were gone, and in their stead was flat pasture and cropland as far as the eye could see in every direction. I was quite obviously somewhere in Alberta now.

One of the men must have spotted me looking out the window, because I heard footsteps approaching. Moments later the hatch flipped up and it was Devan looking down at me. I was acutely aware of my near-nakedness and I became flushed with embarrassment.

“You sleep like the dead Bryson.” He said amused. “I thought we were going to have to worry about you making a fuss in the city, but you slept right through it all.”

I felt the blood drain out of my face. I had slept through my best chance at escape? How could I have been so stupid?

“We picked up some things for you at Walmart and I couldn’t resist telling the clerk how cute our new puppy was.”

What he was saying was lost on me until Ethen walked around the side of the SUV with a bag of dog food and a collar.

“No fucking way!” I said horrified, my eyes locked on the bag. “Are you fucked in the head?” I recoiled as I said the words, expecting Devan to lash out at me. Devan didn’t make any moves to do so however. Instead, he arched an eyebrow and said, “Oh? So, you would rather starve? I thought you’d be getting pretty hungry by now.” His voice was mocking in the worst possible way. “Put on his new collar Ethen.”

As Ethen leaned towards me, I curled myself into the back corner of the trunk. “I won’t wear it!”

“This isn’t up for negotiation. Now bend your fucking head, or I will beat you until you do.” Furious, I leaned forward and let him secure the brown leather collar around my neck. He synched it until it was snug against my skin. The leather strap was tight enough that I intimately knew it was there, but not tight enough to be constricting.

“All of you are fucking psychotic!” I screamed then, the humiliation breaking down my resolve. I felt the heat of shame wash over me.

“Oh? This is just the beginning, wait until the fun actually starts.” Devan said, completely unaffected by my outburst. “Just to let you know, if you’re a bad dog, we will put the shock collar on you instead. It is no ordinary shock collar either, I had it custom designed specifically to keep someone like you quiet.”

I remained silent this time, not sure what to make of Devan’s threat.

“Good. Now here.” He said, picking up the dog food. I watched as Devan set up a bowl of kibble alongside a bowl of water at one end of the trunk.

“Please don’t make me eat this.” I said, desperately.

“Shut up. If you don’t want to starve you will eat it. If dogs can live off of this shit, so can you.”

Devan was in the process of reaching up to pull down the hatch when I said, “I really need to go to the bathroom.”

“Sure, get out then.” Devan said. I unfolded my legs and scootched to the edge of the trunk before leaning out.

“Can I please use my hands?” I asked softly, humiliated again that I needed to even ask permission. My eyes explored the dirt and grass on the ground as I waited for him to reply. “Well since you asked so nicely, why not?” But instead of cutting the ties, Devan walked over to the passenger door, appearing a moment later with a leash. “You didn’t really think I would just untie your hands and let you run away?” He said in that mocking tone again.

I had to pee so badly that I didn’t put up a fight as he attached the leash to the collar and slipped a knife between my wrists. With a sharp, upward tug the blade severed the plastic ties and my hands fell to my sides. I gasped in pain as my stiff shoulders and arms rotated after hours of straining. The skin on my wrists had also started to turn raw and red from the straps cutting into my flesh. I rubbed the skin gingerly and grimaced.

Walking forward, I led Devan to the side of the ditch, across from the SUV and did my business. It felt good to finally relieve myself. When I was done, I felt a tug on the collar as Devan led me back to the trunk. “I will tie your hands in front this time.” He said, pulling out a new zip tie from his pocket.

I looked down the road, hoping, praying, that someone would drive by and see me. But there was nothing. Not a single car in sight. “My family will know I am missing.” I said as I brought my hands forward and Devan made quick work of the bonds. The new ties bit into my sore flesh and I sucked in a sharp breath of pain. 

Ethen, who was still standing by the trunk, spoke up. “They can look all they want. No one will ever find you. All they will ever know is that you disappeared at a rest stop in the mountains sometime in the night.” My heart sank, knowing his words rung true. No one had had a chance to see me since my abduction.

“Get back in.” Devan said, now sounding annoyed. I crawled into the trunk and Devan’s hand moved up to my throat to detach the leash. Without another word, the trunk slammed shut. I watched as the two men walked to the front of the SUV where Quinten was having a smoke. When they started talking, I sunk back towards the floor in defeat. On the other side of the cramped space was my fucking allocation dog food and water.

I leaned forward and used my tied hands to support my body as I sucked up some of the water messily. I was glad that the men couldn’t see or hear me as I gave into their game and slurped up the liquid. I sat back up, water dripping off my chin and onto my bare chest. I took one glance at the dog food and closed my eyes. I wouldn’t do it. I was hungry, but not hungry enough for those dark round balls of puke to look appetizing. Leaning back against the side of the trunk, I closed my eyes and waited. But what I was waiting for, I had no idea.

\---

“We need to get a motel” Quinten said as the vehicle doors opened about ten minutes later. “I am fucking tired man. We drove all night.”

“Yah, I agree with Quinten.” Ethen said. I was getting the feeling that Devan was the main decision maker among the three.

“Fine, but you know it’s risky.”

“If we sleep during the day there is a smaller chance someone will see the kid.” Ethen said. “We have the shock collar, that should keep him quiet.” I cringed.

“True enough.”

“And during the day, there won’t be other guests in the hotel rooms. So, if he does scream, it won’t be as dangerous.”

“Oh, he won’t be screaming. Not after I show him what happens to bad dogs.”

Ethen grunted in agreement.

“Red Deer is less than an hour away. Pick something on the outside of town just encase.” Quinten spoke up.

The SUV started and pulled back onto the road. I knew we must have been somewhere near the number two, which ran straight north from Calgary to the city of Red Deer.

As I sat in the back, I felt myself getting angrier and angrier. They had no right to do this to me. I didn’t know what they were planning, but my situation was steadily getting worse. I had not yet made any real attempt at escape, but I needed to start planning. I needed to get smart and figure out how to get away. Once they had me at their cabin, I doubted I would ever get out of this alive. The hotel in Red Deer could be my only chance.

I knew they were already planning to put the shock collar on me, but I wasn’t sure if they would leave me in the vehicle or take me into the hotel room. My best guess is that they would take me in, seeing as someone would have to stay and watch me otherwise. This meant I had the distance from the trunk to the hotel room door to make my escape, plus the three guys blocking my way, or I could wait till they were asleep. Even if they took turns watching me, fighting one of them increased my odds over all three.

I knew my plan was shit, but I had to try. They were bound to make a mistake at some point and give me an opening. I just needed to make sure I was focused enough to see it when the time came.

My stomach muscles clenched in hunger as time slowly ticked away. The dog food sat across from me, looking just as disgusting as it had before. If I was forced to eat it, I was going to at least make sure they were not around to watch me do it. I focused on my anger instead, letting it consume me for the rest of the trip. My life was quickly falling apart.

Guilt and regret filled my chest at the thought of my parents worrying about me. No doubt by now they would be concerned. I had not checked into the motel in Golden, nor had I phoned to give them any updates on my progress. I would have been getting into Calgary about now if the events from last night had not transpired. I wondered how long it would take them to phone the police. Or maybe someone would notice my car before then and start investigating. My cellphone, wallet, and belongings were no doubt still in the vehicle, making my disappearance look suspicious. 

Leaning forward, I tried to quietly drink some more water. This time I put my lips on the side of the bowl and tilted it, letting the liquid flow into my mouth.

Lifting my head, I peered out the windows, trying to see where we were. It looked like the city was getting closer, as billboards and tall buildings rose up in the distance.

“Put your head down!” Quinten said suddenly, pushing me down with his hand roughly. “Stay down.”

I bit back a response and growled at him instead. I don’t think I had ever growled at anyone before in my life.

“Your puppy is getting rude Devan.” Quinten remarked, watching me cautiously.

“Put the shock collar on him now. We will be getting to the hotel soon. Best he figures out how to behave before we get there.” I heard Devan reply from up front.

I heard a what sounded like a duffel bag getting unzipped before Quinten leaned over the back seat and looked at me. He had a white collar in his hand, which had a contraption in the front, and two silver prongs that jutted out from the inside. He played with it for a moment, turning the device on and adjusting the settings.

“I am assuming that if you talk or yell, this thing is going to give you a shock. The more you try and yell or talk, the more intense the shock will be. You got it?”

I nodded my head in acknowledgement.

Quinten leaned down and wrapped the device around my neck above the leather collar I was already wearing. He synched this one snug as well; the metal prongs digging into my throat.

I brought up my tied hands and tried to make it more comfortable on my neck, but Quinten swatted them away. “Don’t touch.” He said, realising I had more flexibility with my arms out in front of me. Turning around, I lost sight of him for a moment before he reappeared with a new set of zip-ties and his pocket knife.

“Give me your hands.”

I lifted up my wrists and let him cut the ties off of me. When my hands fell apart, I rubbed my wrists gingerly again while I had the opportunity.

“I need to tie your hands behind you back, lean over.

I shook my head; I didn’t want to do that again.

“What part of that sounded like it was up for discussion?” Irritation creeping into Quinten’s voice, his gaze turning hard.

“Is he giving you troubles?” Devan asked.

I was in the process of saying “Fuck you” when the collar zapped me for the first time. I was more surprised than hurt. The supposed “shock” felt more like a bee sting or a pinch. Leaning over, I brought my hands behind my back, giving Quinten access. It was going to be a lot harder to try and get away now. When the zip-ties were replaced, I sat back against the trunk and closed my eyes, anger fuming inside me.

“This place will work” I heard Devan say, putting on the turn signal. “I will go in and get us a room on the ground floor so we don’t have to take him far. You guys stay here and watch him.”

When the SUV came to a stop, Devan got out and went inside.

“You better not try anything stupid Bryson.” Ethen said from the front passenger’s seat. “Devan will beat you to a fucking pulp if you give him a reason to.”

I glared at the floor of the trunk. I wouldn’t have replied even if I was able to. Ethen’s threat was probably true, but I needed this chance at escape. I feared being stuck with them more than anything else at the present moment.

When he got back, Devan drove the SUV closer to our where our room number was and backed into the closest stall. Much to my dismay, there was only a couple feet between the back of the SUV and the hotel door. It was not enough of a distance for me to have any chance at making a getaway. 

“Nice spot, this is perfect.” Ethen said.

The doors opened and closed, and I tensed as the hatch opened up.

“Get out.” Devan said, and I complied. His hand came down to grab my arm as I struggled out of the trunk. Ethen took my other arm, and Quinten followed behind me. Even though the distance between the trunk and the door was only a few steps, they were not taking any risks.

“Get the leash Quinten, I will tie him up in the bathroom.”

“Sure.”

Devan led me straight across the dark dingy hotel room with two double beds and into a small bathroom. “Sit on the floor by the sink.” He ordered.

I complied, using the wall for support as I eased myself down. The hotel room was frigid due to the air conditioning running full bore and I shivered as I sat down on the cold tile of the bathroom floor. Quinten came in a moment later and handed Devan the leash. I watched closely as Devan looped the handle through the piping under the sink and brought the other end of the leash through the handle before pulling it tight and then attached the clip to the leather collar. “Good, now you are going to stay here while we get some sleep.”

With that, Devan shut the lights off in the bathroom, plunging me into near complete darkness as he shut the door. I shivered against the chill, my teeth chattering.

The only way I was going to be able to get out of the bathroom was if I chewed through the leash, and I wasted no time getting started once I was certain the men were sleeping. The fabric was flat but strong and tasted horrible as I twisted my head around to get it in my mouth. I positioned the section of leash in my back molars and started grinding my teeth.

It felt like an hour had past by the time I started to feel the fabric loosen and separate in my mouth. My jaw muscles were overly strained, and each grinding bite had become more and more effortful. I could still hear snoring coming from the other side of the door, but a growing sense of urgency gripped my chest. I chewed harder, praying that it would give away in time.

When the leash finally did snap in two, I was out of my mind with panic. I tried to calm my heart as I fumbled to stand up and cautiously walk to the bathroom door. I couldn’t see a damned thing with the lights out.

When I found the door, I turned, facing away from the door, and let my hands carefully find the knob. It really sucked having my hands tied behind my back, but I wasn’t about to waste any more time trying to break the zip-ties. I doubted there was anything in this bathroom that could help me anyway.

Ever so slowly, I gripped the doorknob and rotated it. My heart hammered in my chest as I eased the handle, praying it wouldn’t make too loud a sound. When I felt the door give away, I slowly let go and turned around. Peering through the crack in the door, I saw that the blinds had been closed and the room was mostly dark. Three lumps on the bed told me everything I needed to know. How stupid could these fuckers be? Maybe they were getting cocky.

I shouldered the door open as carefully as I could and crept across the room, stopping every few feet to make sure no one was moving. When I made it to the front door, I was shaking with anxiety. I was so close. So close.

It was one of those automatically locking doors; it could be opened from the inside, but you’d need a key to get back in from the outside. That was no problem for me because I only wanted out. I thanked the stars no one had thought to lock the deadbolt. I knew once I opened the door and light flooded into the room I would have to run as fast as I fucking could. I turned around again and found the doorknob and slowly tested it.

Right as I was rotating the doorknob however, all hell broke loose.

It started with the cellphone alarm going off.

The harsh beeping scared me so badly I let go of the door handle and screamed in fright, making the collar zap me again. I clocked the back of my head on the door in knee-jerk surprise from the sharp pain at my throat. If I could talk, I would have been yelling profanities.

Devan rolled over on the bed at that exact moment. As he reached for the cellphone and he saw me standing by the front door.

Panicking, I fumbled for the doorknob again and twisted it as Devan stumbled out of bed yelling at Ethen and Quinten to get up. Just as the door swung open, Devan rounded the side of the bed coming after me. I backed out of the room quickly, subsequently turning and running across the hot pavement with my bare feet across the back parking lot of the motel.

I screamed for help despite the shock collar going nuts on my neck. I was too frantic in my escape attempt to notice the prongs burning my skin as the electric shocks got stronger with each yell.

I could hear Devan swearing as he exploded from the hotel room and ran after me. I was halfway across the parking lot when he tackled me to the ground.

“No!” I screamed over and over again as he grabbed me by the hair and my arm and forcefully dragged me back towards the dark room. I had road rash on my legs and chest from being thrown into the pavement and dragged. Ethen and Quinten ran over to help Devan hull me back inside.

As we all stumbled into the room the door swung shut with a bang and someone turned on the lights. I was roughly thrown to the floor. I didn’t even have time to catch my breath before Devan was on top me, punching me over and over again in the face. “You stupid fucking little shit” he yelled at me between punches.

I felt my consciousness fading under the crushing weight of his body on my chest and the disorienting blows to my head. My thoughts jumbled together and all I felt was pain, and the trickling of blood as it ran down the cuts on my face and nose.

“Hey Devan! That’s enough! You’re going to fucking kill him!” I heard Quinten say before the blows stopped coming. I groaned, my head falling listlessly to the side.

“Stupid fucker deserves to die after the stunt he just pulled.”

“It’s our fault. We should have expected it.”

“Whatever.”

“Ethen, go outside and make sure no one saw anything. He was fucking screaming his lungs out.”

I heard the hotel door open and slam shut again through the fog in my brain.

“Fucker chewed through the leash.” Devan observed.

I felt myself starting to cry as tears fell from my eyes and my chest heaved.

“Oh, shut up Bryson.” Devan said, his weight lifting from me as he got up. I curled up into a ball on the floor, letting the pain and despair overwhelm me. Devan’s firm fingers wrapped around the leather collar and he unceremoniously dragged me across the floor, choking me in the process. I tried getting my legs underneath me for support, but I just ended up flopping pitifully. Letting go of the collar, he stuck his hands under my armpits and hoisted me onto the bed. I fell back, my skull slamming into the headboard. Black dots invaded my vision before they slowly started to clear.

I was still crying pitifully when Ethen came back. This time Ethen locked the deadbolt after closing the door. “I went past the office and nothing seemed out of the ordinary. We are the only ones back here. Luckily, the maids were done for the day already. I think we’re in the clear.”

“You here that Bryson?” Devan said, punching me in the stomach. “Your little escape attempt didn’t work out so well for you.”

“What do you think we should do?” Quinten asked cautiously.

“I think we can stay here a bit longer and then head out. We only got two hours sleep.” Devan replied.

“Sure. What are we going to do with him?”

“I will hold onto him. I don’t think Bryson will be able to try and get away again for a while.”

I tried to stifle my crying as Devan sunk onto the bed beside me, his arm wrapping around my waist. His other hand came up to my face and he roughly wiped the blood and tears away with his hand.

“Bad dogs get a beating Bryson. Next time will be worse.” Devan’s voice was low, firm, as he hugged me close to his body. I was too exhausted to push away as he pulled me down the mattress into a laying position.

The pain in my head was intense, overpowering everything else that was happening around me. I had had migraines before, but this took it to a whole new level. As my face rubbed against the pillow, I could see streaks of blood marring the crisp white pillowcases.

“Let’s sleep for another couple of hours, then we can get Bryson cleaned up and we can take turns driving. I want to get to the cabin as soon as possible.”

“Sounds good.” Quinten replied. The two other men climbed onto the second double bed, and Devan eased down beside me, his arm still wrapped around my body. I felt him push the covers over us, and he leaned in and whispered, “I am a light sleeper, so try anything and I will know.”

I merely nodded my head enough to provide an answer. Tears silently leaked out of my eyes as the larger man spooned against my body. I was left hurting and both physically and emotionally broken when the lights went out.


	4. Travelling

I woke to someone shaking me roughly and fingers trying to pry my eyes open. I felt delirious and confused. “Wha?” I tried to groan, before setting off the shock collar and getting a jolted in the process. My skin burned beneath the probes.

“Take the shock collar off him.” Someone said, and I felt my head being turned to the side as fingers worked at the clasps.

“Probably shouldn’t have let him sleep so soon after the beating. He might have a concussion.”

When the collar came away, I felt someone rubbing my neck softly.

I tried to open my eyes and instantly regretted it, as the bright lights sent stabbing pain into my brain. I groaned again, pushing back into the sheets. My whole body hurt. Everything hurt.

“Let’s get him up and into the shower. We need to get this blood cleaned up.”

Blood?

“W-what happened?” I asked groggily as they pushed me into an upright position. My head and jaw throbbed painfully. I wanted to reach forward and clutch my head in my hands, but they were tied behind my back.

“You tried to get away Bryson, and Devan dragged you back here and beat you for it.”

“Get away?” I slurred slowly. I could only vaguely remember bits and pieces of what had happened.

There was silence in the room as I swayed on the bed. I felt like I was going to pass out.

“He doesn’t remember.” Another voice said, an undertone of concern coming through.

“Let’s just get him in the shower. Quinten, can you help Bryson with that?”

“Yeah, sure.”

I pushed to my feet slowly, Quinten’s hand resting on my back as he guided me to the washroom.

I leaned against the wall as Quinten turned on the water and started the shower. He striped naked in front of me and despite my dazed state of mind, I felt a significant level of discomfort and adverted my eyes. As if sensing my unease, he said “Don’t worry Bryson, I am just going to help you shower.” Quinten moved over to me, pushing down my briefs. I stepped out of them, wishing I was able to cover myself as he led me to the tub.

It was a small space and I leaned against the shower’s wall for support. The warm spray hit my face and chest, rinsing the dried blood from my skin. Quinten got in behind me then, his body pressing up against my own. I felt his arms wrap around me and delicately rub my skin with a thin bar of soap. His skin was warm against my own, and I could feel the definition of his chest against my back.

I sucked in a sharp breath as the cuts stung from where I had been tackled to the ground. Pink tinted water swirled into the drain.

“You are doing good Bryson.” Quinten said softly, as if I was a child in need of comfort. I didn’t feel anything emotionally, only numb disorientation and a pounding migraine.

When he was done cleaning me, he got me to change positions with him. I stared at his muscular back and firm, toned ass as I waited for him to finish. The discomfort I had felt earlier was still present, but I didn’t know what to do about it, so I did nothing. I had never been naked with another man before in this kind of way.

When Quinten turned the shower off, he dried me with a towel. I felt genuine shame at that moment, wishing I could do it myself. He wasn’t phased at all and helped me back into my underwear before getting himself dressed.

I looked over at the mirror as the fog receded and startled myself. The sides of my face were turning a nasty shade of purple and I had a decent black eye forming. The prongs from the shock collar had left a patch of burned skin at the front of my neck. My eyes looked scared. 

“Let’s go.” Quinten said, pulling open the door and leading me back into the main room. The front door was open, and he took me straight out to the vehicle. I thought he was going to put me in the trunk as usual, but this time he steered me towards the side door. “You will sit on the back seat with me for the rest of the trip. I want to keep an eye on you.”

“Okay.” I said dumbly, getting into the SUV and sitting down on the cloth seat. Quinten hopped in beside me, buckling me in before doing the same for himself.

“Good to go.” He said to Devan and Ethen, who were already in place up front.

As we began to move out, I felt nausea grip my insides. I closed my eyes, trying to breathe in and out slowly. After some time, the sensation started to pass and I opened my eyes again. Quinten was watching me as if I were a puzzle he was trying to figure out. My eyes found his and for the first time I noticed how green they were. His square jaw clenched as I looked at him and he adverted his gaze, to my surprise.

As we sat in silence, my stomach suddenly growled, and I saw Devan’s eyes look to me in the rear-view mirror. “If your hungry, you know where your food is.”

I remembered then the dog food in the trunk. “Please!” I whined, “Don’t make me eat that.”

“Then starve.”

His cold tone hit me like a slap. I felt tears brim my eyes in frustration. I knew pleading wouldn’t change the reality of my situation.

“Do you want me to get it for you?” Quinten asked gently.

I didn’t look at him as I nodded my head. A small part of me appreciated the fact that he hadn’t mocked me like Devan had.

Quinten unbuckled his seatbelt and twisted over the top of the backseat, reaching down and grabbing the bowl. He set it down between us as he put his seatbelt back on. Picking up a handful of kibble, he brought it up to my mouth. I slowly leaned forward and closed my eyes as I brought it into my mouth.

The dog food was dry and hard as I chewed it using my back molars, trying my best to swallow it quickly without choking. It was gross, but it wasn’t as revolting as I had been expecting. Quinten picked up some more kibbles and I took them from him without hesitating this time. After I had finished the bowl, he opened a new water bottle and held it to my lips. I drank half the bottle before he pulled it away.

“You did good.” Ethen said, watching me from the front passenger’s seat.

Embarrassed, I looked out the window trying to ignore him.

Quinten reached up to touch me on the shoulder and I visibly flinched. He noticed my reaction and withdrew his hand. I hoped he wouldn’t try to touch me again. I wanted to be alone. I wanted all their prying eyes to turn away.

“Are you feeling better?” Ethen asked.

“Yes.” I croaked out, telling him what he wanted to hear.

The kilometers flew by with idle chit chat crossing between the three men. I kept quiet, resting my head back against headrest. I didn’t feel very well, but there was nothing I could do about it. After some time, Devan switched out with Ethen, who continued driving.

I eventually got the nerve to look sideways at Quinten. His eyes were closed. I didn’t think he was sleeping though, only resting.

“Why did you choose to take me?” I asked softly.

For a minute I thought maybe no one had heard me, and then Quinten opened his eyes. “Can I tell him Devan?” He asked.

“Sure, it ain’t gunna change anything.”

“The three of us just got out of prison.” Quinten said casually. “We were all doing time in the Kent Institution in Vancouver. We hooked up in cell block and decided a long time ago what we were going to do when we got out. We were planning to travel out to Devan’s cabin and find someone to play with once we got there. However, you came along unexpectantly and the opportunity was just too perfect to pass up.”

I was surprisingly calm as I listened to Quinten. Maybe it was because when Quinten spoke, he talked to me like I was a person, and didn’t belittle and mock me like Devan or Ethen. As much as I feared knowing what they would do to me, wrapping my mind around why seemed to help.

“What were you all in prison for?”

“You sure you want to know? Might be easier for you to cope staying in the dark Bryson.”

I nodded my head, I needed to know. I needed to prepare myself for what they were capable of. 

“I was twenty-two when I got convicted for drug trafficking and attempted murder. Judge gave me ten years.” Quinten said. “Ethen got five years for attempted rape.”

“Fucking asshole fought back and managed to nock me out cold before I could get to the good part. I can’t believe I had to do time for it.” Ethen said with genuine anger. Devan laughed at him, punching him playfully in the shoulder. “Don’t worry bud, you will be able to finish the job this time around.”

I knew Devan was referring to me. I bit my lower lip as feelings of anxiety and dread began to build again.

“Devan had a fifteen-year sentence for rape and murder, but he got out in ten for good behavior.”

I wished now I had taken Quinten’s advice and not asked. I knew the men planned on raping me, and I was trying my hardest to stay calm about it, but murder? Would Devan have no qualms about killing me after they used me and dump my body like trash? It sounded like he had done it before. What was stopping him from doing it again?

I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to give up hope that I could somehow get out of this alive. I felt tears slide down the sides of my cheeks, and I tried to keep quiet as I cried.

\---

Stress was both physically and mentally exhausting. I had fallen asleep after crying and was now waking up again to the sounds of the guys talking.

“Let’s pull over onto one of these dirt roads, I need to stretch my legs.” Quinten said.

“I could use a break too.” Ethen remarked, turning the vehicle off the main road. The sun was starting to set now, and I had no idea where we were.

“Bryson is awake again, lets get him out of the car.” Quinten remarked, and Devan grunted in approval.

Quinten reached over and undid my seatbelt, and I shuffled across the seat and stumbled out of the vehicle. It did feel good to stretch my legs again.

“Here.” Quinten said, grabbing my arm and turning me around. I heard him pop open his knife, and a second later he cut through the bindings. “Don’t make any sudden moves Bryson.”

I nodded my head. Moving out into the ditch, I relieved myself before walking back to the vehicle. The guys were watching me closely, not trusting me for a second.

As I stood by the door waiting for them to finish their smokes, I rubbed my wrists. The skin was starting to break in places where the ties had cut in the deepest. I wished they would use something else to tie me with, something not so abrasive.

Reaching up, I was able to touch the skin on my face for the first time since the beating. Even touching it softly made me wince. The skin around my eye was puffy and temples were extremely tender.

Quinten walked over to me, pulling the cigarette out of his mouth just long enough to talk. “Did you want some more food?”

The corner of my lip pulled back in distaste as he asked, but I said yes anyway. The dog food wasn’t exactly a filling meal, especially since I had only eaten a small amount of it earlier. Quinten leaned into the car and pulled out the bowl and shook some food out of the bag. Handing it to me, he walked back to the front of the SUV to finish his smoke with Devan and Ethen.

I held onto the bowl and took a deep breath, preparing myself before picking up a handful and popping them into my mouth. I didn’t think eating this shit would ever get easier. It was more so the humiliation than the taste that made eating it so awful. As I chewed, I found myself getting angry again. I hated being humiliated. I hated standing here in my underwear. I hated Devan. I hated Ethen. I hated Quinten and what they were going to make me do.

When I finished the bowl, I threw it on the ground and screamed in frustration, punching the side of the SUV with my fist. All it did was hurt my knuckles.

“Don’t damage the fucking car!” Devan shouted at me, pissed.

“Fuck you!” I snarled and started walking away slowly without a second thought. I couldn’t be here anymore. I couldn’t do this anymore!

“Don’t you fucking dare walk away kid.” I heard Devan yell after me, the three guys breaking out into a run behind me. I knew I wasn’t going to get away, but I kept walking down the ditch to make them come get me out of spite.

Ethen’s hand grabbed my forearm, and Devan came up behind me, wrapping his arm around my neck in a tight hold. I stopped moving. I didn’t struggle against them.

“No more outbursts Bryson. We’re are not done with you until I say we are, and that isn’t going to be for a long time. The sooner you come to terms with that the better.”

Devan let go of my neck and forcefully twisted me around and marched me back to the vehicle. Quinten just shook his head in disappointment when I glanced at him.

I got back in without saying anything, and Devan took out a new zip-tie and bound my hands in front. “We will be at the cabin tonight and then you won’t need these anymore.”

I bit back a snarky remark. Was that supposed to be encouraging?


	5. Home Sweet Home

By the time we got to the cabin, I had completely lost all sense of direction. Devan had been driving again, and at some point, he’d turned up a dirt road. The forest had reappeared a short while ago, leaving the prairies behind us.

The lights of the cabin were on when we pulled up. As the vehicle came to a stop the front door swung open. A massive man, tall and overweight, stepped out onto the deck. He had a bald head with a long greying beard. The glow of the house illuminated his black leather jacket and worn jeans. Despite his size, what intimidated me immediately were all of his tattoos. The black ink was sprawled across his neck and travelled down both his arms.

With a sick sense of dread, I hoped my captors wouldn’t let this man touch me.

Devan got out of the vehicle and the two shook hands up on the deck. Ethen and Quinten stayed in the SUV with me, not budging until Devan waved for us to get out.

“Come on, this is it.” Quinten said, undoing my seatbelt and telling at me to hurry up. I did as I was told and let him lead me towards the cabin.

Devan and the old man turned towards us as we approached, and their gazes settled on me.

“Who is this?” The old man asked, perking an eyebrow at my naked skin and fucked up face.

“This is Bryson, we picked him up along the way.”

“You boys’ didn’t waste any time getting the party started now did you?”

“Nope. Been wanting this for far too long. Thanks for looking after the cabin since my dad passed Bill.”

“It hasn’t been an issue. The old lady has been driving me crazy anyway. I needed some time out of the house now and again. Everything is all set up inside. Home sweet home.” Bill laughed. “If you need anything, you just give me a call. The gang hasn’t forgotten about you; they want you back. I want you back.”

“I will think about it, rejoining the gang I mean. In the meantime, you got any heroin on you?”

“Nope, you will have to come by my place if you want some. Can’t be carrying it around anymore like we used to.”

“Okay, one of us will come by at some point this week. See you later Bill.”

The larger man walked off the deck and headed to his truck as I was led inside.

The interior of the cabin was nicer than the outside, which was old and worn. The inside in comparison was surprisingly clean and bright. The log walls gave the living space a cozy atmosphere and a fireplace was set into the wall across from two couches. There was an open concept kitchen on the right with a table and chairs.

I was taken through the living room and down a dimly lit hallway. We passed a small washroom before getting to the bedrooms. There were three doors and Devan opened the first one on the left, pushing me inside before flicking on the light.

A large bed was set up in the room with a single blanket and pillow. Beside the bed was an old nightstand. No other furnishings adorned the room. “This is you Bryson. Home sweet home.”

To my dismay, there was only one small window in the room which had vertical steel bars embedded into the framing. I wondered how many other people had been held captive here in the past.

I held out my wrists and Devan cut off the ties before backing out of the room and shutting the thick wooden door. I heard a metal bolt slide closed on the other side.

Standing awkwardly in the room, I moved over to the bed and sat down. The air was cold, as the heat from the living room fireplace was blocked by the thick wooden door. There was a small electric heat register against the wall, but no dial in the room to turn it on. Pulling the thin blanket from the bed, I wrapped it around my bare shoulders and shivered.

Would they come for me now that we were here? would they want to rape me right away? I moved over to the door, trying to hear what was going on outside. Muffled voices and the scrapping of chairs being moved across the floor came back to me. It sounded like they were hanging out in the kitchen.

I flicked the light switch off by the door and walked to the bed, crawling on top and huddling into a tight ball for warmth. Even with the blanket wrapped around me like a cocoon, I was still cold under the covers.

As I laid awake, unable to fall asleep, I listened to the loud laughing and shouting emanating from the living room. It sounded like the guys were well on their way to getting drunk. Maybe that meant they’d forgotten about me.

I gritted my teeth against the misery.

\---

I was still awake when heavy footsteps pounded down the hallway and stopped on the other side of my door. The bolt slid free with a scraping clank and the door swung open. The lights flickered on and I quickly sat upright, covering my body with the blanket while I squinted my eyes against the harsh light. Devan staggered in, laughing, as Ethen followed through next. They came up to the bed and Devan tried to pull the blanket off of me, and I fought to pull it back.

“Let go you moron.” Devan said, and Ethen joined in for the game of tug-o-war. I wasn’t strong enough to resist the both of them and the blanket slipped from my hands. Devan and Ethen both stumbled back laughing as the blanket gave way suddenly. “You little fuck, come here.” Devan said playfully.

“No! Get away from me!” I exclaimed, scrambling off the bed and running out of the room. Devan and Ethen had left the door wide open. But my flight was short lived. Quinten stood at the end of the hallway blocking my only escape. “Let me go please!” I begged, “Don’t let them do this.”

“I am not your friend Bryson. I will not help you.” Quinten said. “Fighting them will only make it harder for you. You will learn that in time.” I thought about trying to fight Quinten, to push my way past him, but I knew it would be futile. All three men were in prime shape from spending years in prison working out. I wasn’t in bad condition myself, but at 5’6 and 145lbs, I was comparatively slender and under muscled. Quinten was slightly taller than me and had a thicker build with broad shoulders. After seeing what he looked like in the shower this morning, I imagined he was closer to 190lbs.

Devan stumbled out of the bedroom and down the hallway, grabbing me roughly from behind. I kicked out as he dragged me back into the room. Devan was the biggest, closer to 5’10 and over 220lbs. The guy was both tall and thick, built like a tree. His strength overpowered me easily and he threw me onto the bed. Realistically, Ethen was the only one of my captors who I stood a chance against in a fight. He was the same height as me and also of a slender build with toned muscle. I didn’t think he could weigh more than 160lbs.

“You can break him in first Ethen. I know you want to.”

“Seriously man? I won’t say no. I have been wanting this all-fucking day.”

Devan held me down as Ethen slipped his fingers beneath the waistband of my underwear and pulled them off. “Stop!” I shouted, trying to kick my legs at him. “I don’t want to do this, please!”

But they ignored me as I struggled fruitlessly in Devan’s grip.

“He is going to be tight, especially since he is fighting. Too bad Bill didn’t have any heroin on him, would have made this easier.”

I freaked, twisting and turning, trying anything to wriggle free. Devan was so fucking heavy! I was having a hard time breathing as he crushed my upper body into the bed, all of his weight pushed against my back and arms as he leaned over me.

I heard Ethen’s pants drop to the floor as he got undressed behind me.

“Do we have any lube?”

“Check the night table.”

“Nope, nothing.”

“Well, isn’t that too bad for you Bryson.” Devan said in mock sympathy.

“I-I have to go the washroom.” I said suddenly, a different kind of desperation entering my voice. My nerves were getting the best of me and if I didn’t get to the toilet something bad was going to happen. Ethen nodded his head, “probably not a bad idea. Let’s take him to the bathroom first.”

Devan stood up and I slid off the bed, getting to my feet. I knew where the washroom was, but I let them lead me there. Once inside, I wasted no time getting my business done. I was incredibly nervous, and my hands trembled as I wiped and flushed the toilet.

“You ready now?” Ethen asked impatiently. I licked my lips and shook my head in disagreement. “Well too bad, let’s go.” I walked out of the bathroom and back towards the bedroom to avoid Devan’s wrath. 

“Get on the bed.” Devan ordered and I complied. I sat on the mattress and covered my dick with my hands feeling self-conscious. 

“Roll over, get on your stomach.” Ethen ordered next. I shook my head. I didn’t want to get hurt more then I already was, but I couldn’t bring myself to obey all of their commands. I had to put up a fight. I wouldn’t do this willingly. The mere notion of what was about to happen was repulsive. I’d have a hard time living this down regardless of whether or not I managed to escape, or they let me go. That sick feeling of dread weighed me down.

“If you want to do this the hard way, then fine. We like a struggle. Makes no difference for us.” Devan said, grabbing the leather collar around my neck and savagely reefing me backwards and rolling me over onto my stomach forcefully. I coughed in response to the choking and got my hands underneath my stomach and pushed up, lifting my upper body back off the bed. Devan hit me hard, his elbow coming down on the middle of my back. I collapsed forward onto my stomach with a cry of pain. I laid unmoving as I tried to catch my breath and manage the discomfort in my spine.

“I will hold onto him, so you just do what you want.” Devan said, his tone becoming more sober as he sat down on the bed above my head. He leaned forward over me and put his hands on my shoulder blades, holding me down simply with his superior weight.

“I will owe you for this.” Ethen said, unmasked pleasure in his voice.

I started fighting again as I felt Ethen climb up onto the bed behind me. “Stop!” I shouted again, my face getting pushed into the sheets.

Ethen forcefully spread my legs apart and crawled between my thighs. His hands gripped my hips, and he forced my ass into the air.

“You’re going to be the tightest piece of ass I have ever had Bryson.” He said in a thick voice. I struggled again, but briefly this time. Devan’s crushing weight made it hard to fight and manage to keep breathing. As Ethen brushed up against me, I felt his hard cock touch my leg. I instinctively tried to push forward on the bed to get away, but Devan held me firmly in place. I felt sick to my stomach as Ethen laughed, slapping his cock against my ass several times in amusement.

Ethen’s hands moved from my hips up to my cheeks as he spread me open, positioning himself before my entrance. I mumbled into the mattress, feeble, incoherent protests.

When Ethen started pushing into me, I yelled out. It was more painful than I thought it would be as he tried to force his way inside me. I clenched my muscles involuntarily, making it worse for myself and causing Ethen to gasp. “Fuck!” He exclaimed. “You’re too damn tight. Have to loosen you up a bit first.”

Ethen’s cock fell away and was replaced by a probing finger. He spit into my crack and smeared his saliva around my hole. After a bit of messaging, he pushed his digit inside. I squirmed again, sucking in a sharp breath as his finger penetrated me. It felt so wrong, so violating. I wanted desperately to hide from the shame I felt. My breathing was coming more rapidly now as I freaked out and my adrenaline spiked. I broke out into a sweat.

“Shhh….” Devan cooed, looking down at me. “Don’t get so worked up. Just do yourself a favour and relax. Ethen’s fucking you either way.”

I refused. I wasn’t going to relax. Not now. Not ever. “Fuck you.” I said breathlessly.

Ethen withdrew his finger and then pushed in again. He did this for several minutes, each thrust of his finger made my hole sorer. When he seemed satisfied, he spit on me again and then guided his cock to my entrance and began pushing in. I gasped at the larger intrusion as my hole was forced to accommodate the head of his cock. Once he’d pushed the head of his dick inside, I could feel my ring of muscles suddenly embrace his shaft. He paused then, waiting for a moment for things to adjust before starting to move back and forth.

I whimpered as his motions caused a burning pain at my hole. It was almost unbearable. I gritted my teeth and tried to keep from shouting out.

“He’s so fucking tight.” I heard Ethen moan. He reached down and messaged my ass cheeks before slapping them hard several times. Each slap left a smarting tingle on my skin. Devan didn’t divert his attention from holding me down. 

Ethen dug his fingers into my hips as he started thrusting more. I knew my torture was only just getting started. After a while he slowed down, pulled halfway out, and thrust back inside with vigor. I bucked in the bed, hoping to dislodge him, but Ethen seemed to like it, and he did it again, slamming into me.

I was crazed with pain I had never felt before as Ethen started to gain momentum, thrusting into me harder and faster. I held my breath, trying to block it out if only for a few seconds at a time. The sick sound of our bodies colliding echoed in the room. When I thought I couldn’t bare another second, I felt Ethen tense and he came moments later, shooting hot squirts of cum up my ass.

His grip loosened on my hips as he slid out. “That. Was. Fucking. Golden.” He said enthusiastically, emphasising each work. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block it out.

Devan and Ethen both got up from the bed and I laid unmoving on the mattress. Beyond the throbbing of my hole, I was also emotionally distraught. I didn’t know how to process what had just happened to me.

I heard Ethen leave the room, his lighter footfalls receding down the hallway. 

I thought the nightmare was over for the time being until I heard Devan undo his zipper next.

“No!” I moaned, twisting into a fetal position on the bed.

“Get used to it kid, this is your new life.”

I didn’t want to believe it. I couldn’t believe it.

Devan stripped. I could see that his cock was already hard as he climbed back on the bed behind me. I weakly tried to scramble away, hands gripping at the wrinkled sheets like a lifeline. Devan reached over and grabbed my foot. Straightening me out with a sharp tug, he pulled me flat against the bed before wrenching my legs apart and arching my hips up just like Ethen had.

Unlike Ethen, he didn’t try easing himself inside of me at first. No. Instead he opened up my cheeks, placed the head of his dick on my hole and started shoving into me before I could even prepare myself. Ethen’s cum acted as a lubricant, letting Devan’s dick slip right through my ring of muscles. I couldn’t help but scream this time at the sudden intrusion. He was huge, his dick expanding me more than Ethen’s had. I clawed at the bed to try and get away again and Devan locked his hands on my hips, keeping himself firmly planted inside me as I struggled.

“It hurts!” I sobbed into the sheets, but Devan ignored me. He started moving, thrusting himself forcefully into my hole. I couldn’t stand it, but I couldn’t stop it either.

“Ethen didn’t do a very good job loosening you up for me.” He said gruffly, before picking up speed. “Your so tight I won’t last very long, probably good for you though.” He laughed, amusing himself.

I screamed several more times before Devan came, spilling his thick load inside me. When he finally pulled out, I felt like I had been ripped.

“Looks like we popped your cherry.” He mocked, wiping streaks of blood off his dick with the crumpled bed sheets. I whimpered, finally able to crawl away from him to the far side of the bed. Seeing as how he was now done with me, Devan got up, picked up his clothes, and turned the lights off before shutting the door and sliding the bolt home.

I silently cried myself to sleep.


	6. Never Give Up

When I woke up the next morning, my face was caked with dried tears and by body was incredibly sore. I had bruises on my arms from where Devan had been holding me down last night. The sheets were a mess, as sometime throughout the night the two men’s cum had started leaking out me, mingling with the blood from my hole. I tried to sit up, but it was too painful. Laying back down, I stared at the wall in shock. If only last night had been a nightmare.

I don’t know how long I laid there before the door finally opened. Quinten walked in yawning. I shrunk back from him in fear.

“It’s okay, I’m not going to fuck you. I do need to get you cleaned up though. I can’t believe Devan and Ethen left you like this all night.”

I was still trembling as Quinten took my arm and helped me from the bed. I had a difficult time standing at first, my muscles uncooperative. His arm wrapped around my waist, and we walked slowly out the door and down the hall to the bathroom. He left me leaning up against the door frame while he got the shower running.

“Come on, it will be okay.” Quinten said, pulling back the curtain and helping me inside. The hot water felt good as it washed away the sins of the night before. I wanted all traces of them gone. My hand was shaking when I grabbed the soap, the bar slipping from between my fingers and hitting the tub below with a bang. I went to bend down to pick it up and regretted the action immediately. My backside throbbed in protest. I winced, not able to help myself.

“Here.” Quinten said, pulling back the curtain, picking up the soap and giving it back to me.

“Thank you.” I said quietly, holding onto the bar more firmly this time. When I was done, I turned off the taps and Quinten handed me a towel.

“You look a bit better now.” He observed, but I knew he was lying. I looked like shit. My face was a mess and I was covered in bruises.

“I will get you new sheets for the bed and some food, okay?” He said, leading me back to my room. I looked away from the mattress, unable to face the evidence.

Quinten stripped the bed and left, coming back with a new sheet. I stood in the corner of the room as he made the bed and left again. This time he came back with the bowl of dog food and a bowl of water.

My heart sank even further. After everything they did, they still wanted me to eat like that.

After Quinten had placed the items on the floor he left, closing, and locking the door behind him.

Naked, I crumpled to the floor in defeat before crawling over to the food. I ate it all, crunching each ball beneath my molars before swallowing. Two times I had to stop and take a drink of water before continuing.

When the food was gone, I was still hungry as I picked my way across the floor to where my old underwear lay crumpled. I didn’t care if I spent the rest of my life in them, I just wanted desperately to cover myself. Standing up, I carefully pulled on my briefs and climbed into the clean bed.

Wrapping the thin blanket around my body, I laid back on my stomach, staring at the wall.

They had had me one full day now, going on two. I wondered if the police were looking for me yet, or if they would at all. No doubt my parents would be worried, wondering why I had not contacted them. I felt an odd sense of disassociation, as if completely forgetting them would make my current reality easier to cope with. I needed to focus on what was happening here and find a way to escape.

I was laying on the bed, still staring at the wall when the door began to open again. I didn’t react at first, thinking that Quinten was coming to check on me. I had no reason to fear him yet, not like I did Devan or Ethen. But when heavy footfalls sounded across the floor, I startled, instantly realizing my mistake. I scrambled up, my legs getting caught in the blanket as Devan reached out and grabbed me by the collar, hulling me onto the floor.

“Stop!” I wailed, my knees slamming into the hardwood floor.

“I like getting off in the mornings, keeps me in a better mood for the rest of the day.” Devan stated, clenching my collar in one hand and using the other to rip off my underwear. I heard the seam split as he forcefully tugged them off. I used my hands to cover myself, as if Devan had not already seen me naked.

Still keeping his one hand firmly on my collar, he tossed my trunks across the room and started to pull down his own pajama bottoms with the other. I shuffled, turning my body away from him, knees scraping across the floor. “Don’t do this! I can’t go again right now, it still hurts!”

My cries fell on deaf ears as Devan stepped out of his bottoms, pulling my hips back around so that my ass was facing him. I felt tears slide down my cheeks as he knelt down on his knees behind me. He kept his hold on my neck while he played with himself. When I felt his erect cock rub against my leg, I tried to move out of the way again.

“Stop messing around kid. Come here.” He said, all business no play. He was going to do this. I heard the determination of it in his tone.

“P-Please!” I cried, my voice no doubt carrying through the cabin. If anyone heard my cries however, they didn’t care.

Devan released his grip on my collar in order to punch me in the back, hard. Shocked, I fell forward, unable to get my hands beneath me in time to catch myself. My forehead cracked into the floorboards. I would no doubt sport yet another bruise. I groaned in pain as Devan used my weakened state to re-position himself behind me.

I gasped as he started to push in, my bruised ass throbbing at the penetration. I could only mumble incoherently as the sharp pain overwhelmed me. I heard Devan grunting behind me, pushing in harder. My face was forced into the floor again as he suddenly thrusted, sinking all the way in. I brought my arms out in front of me and tried to push up onto all fours, but Devan pushed me down again aggressively. 

“I like you in that position. I am going to fuck you into the floor.” He laughed, gripping my hips harshly as he started thrusting. Every time I tried to bring my head up, he would push me so hard I smacked my head on the floor. I stopped resisting, letting my face slide up and down against the wood planks with each pounding he was dishing out.

I somehow managed to zoned out, finding a new place in my mind as the pain-filled daze took over. I hardly even registered what was happening as he unloaded inside me and pulled out. I sagged fully to the ground as he let go of my hips.

“Look at this mess.” Devan said, joking. “How are you going to clean this up?”

I didn’t respond at all, still lying on the floor. That didn’t deter Devan for a second. He grabbed my collar, lifting me to my knees by my neck. The strain was brutal.

“Suck it off.”

He shoved my face in front of his now flaccid dick, and I instantly knew what he wanted. My daze quickly faded away as a newfound horror washed over me.

“No.” I said surprisingly firm, not moving a muscle.

“Oh yes you are.” Devan said, pushing my head forward, forcing my lips to press against him. I struggled to pull my head back in panic as the smell and wetness of him overwhelmed me, but he me in place until I stopped struggling.

“Let’s try this again.” He said, growing impatient.

He used his free hand to pry my mouth open and then shoved himself between my teeth. I gagged as his dick flopped against my tongue.

“Now lick. If you try to bite me, I’ll fucking kill you. That’s a promise.”

I knew he was telling the truth. Despite everything I felt, I obeyed him, hoping that it would be over soon. My tongue explored the folds of his dick as I took my own blood, his spent cum, and other things I refused to acknowledge into my mouth.

“Damn, I should fuck you again right now. Lucky for you I have something I need to go out and do this morning.”

I crumpled into a heap on the floor as Devan let me go, picked up his pants and sauntering out of the room. As quickly as he left, Quinten appeared, standing beside the door. He had an irritated look on his face. Was he mad at me or Devan? What could I have possibly done besides being used like a cum dump?

“Here I spent my fucking time cleaning you up and he goes and makes a mess again. At least he had the decency to nail you on the floor. We don’t have any more bedsheets right now.”

I looked down, ashamed and not having anything to say. The floorboards were spotted with cum streaks, blood, and tears.

“Can I please have a shower again?” I asked, sounding like a beaten child.

“No. I am not cleaning you up every time they fuck you. I am sure Ethen will want a turn when he gets up. I don’t know how he slept through all the noise you were making.”

The heat of embarrassment washed through my skin as I crawled back towards the bed.

“I am going out with Devan for awhile. Ethen will be here though to keep an eye on you.” He said before shutting and locking the door.

Lifting myself onto the bed, I hid my head under the blanket, disgusted with myself. I couldn’t believe I had let Devan shove his cock in my mouth. I licked the sheets, trying to get the smell and taste of him off my tongue. But the memories were scarred into my brain like a movie clip on repeat.

I heard the SUV outside drive away and felt a meager sense of relief knowing that Devan was going to be gone for awhile. I couldn’t help but wonder about Quinten though, who had so far kept his distance from me. Maybe the third man wasn’t into this rape gig as must as Ethen and Devan were. Maybe I could eventually convince Quinten to help me get away.

I laid on the bed, letting fantasies of escape run rampant through my mind. I was angry again now that I had started to recover from Devan’s attack this morning.

About an hour had passed when Ethen cautiously opened the door and walked into the room. I instantly knew what I needed to do. I had never been a violent person, but in this exact moment, I felt capable of anything. I lifted the blanket off of me slowly as Ethen drew closer. I let him think I was hurting and vulnerable. I was, no doubt about it, but right now I had a purpose that pushed all that pain and hurt away.

“I heard you and Devan going at it this morning. Sounded hot.” Ethen said, reaching for me. At that moment I reacted. Lunging forward, I grabbed his outstretched hand and bit down on his arm as hard as I could, immediately tasting his blood in my mouth. “Jesus FUCK! Get OFF ME!” Ethen yelled in pain. When I released him, he stumbled back, gripping his bleeding arm. He looked surprised as I launched off the bed and punched him as hard as I could in the face, forcing him to stumble backwards until he hit the wall.

I yelled at him as I punched him again, not giving him an opportunity to retaliate. When he started sinking to the floor, I kicked him in the side before running to the door and slamming it shut. I remembered to slide the old, metal bolt home, locking Ethen in the room before taking off through the house.

I didn’t know when Quinten and Devan were going to be back, so I didn’t waste a second. Ripping the front door open, I ran out of the cabin and off the deck, my bare feet carrying me across the driveway and into the bush. I was stark naked as I ran across the yard and into the forest. I didn’t know where I was going, but I was getting the hell out of here and as far away as I possibly could.


	7. Hope

When I finally stopped running to catch my breath, I was surrounded by dense bush. Some of the bushes were taller than me, and I had to practically swim through the branches to get anywhere. I smiled, confident that Devan would never be able to find me. Not in this. My arms and legs were crisscrossed with dozens of scrapes and cuts from the vegetation slashing against my skin.

After I had fought through a particularly dense patch I stopped, sitting down carefully on a fallen poplar tree. The trunk was hard, and my bruised ass complained as I sat down. Now that I was a distance from the cabin, I needed to think. I needed to find a road and flag down a car for help or find a house. I was a little uneasy with both ideas considering I was stark naked and looked like shit, but it was unavoidable.

My throat was parched, and I swallowed the thick mucus which had built up in my mouth. Water. Food. Real food. I almost cried just thinking about real food. I was starving. But I need to get out of here first. I reminded myself. I wasn’t going to get to eat real food if I ended up lost out here in the forest.

The sound of a mosquito hovering next to my ear startled me and I swatted it away. Now that I wasn’t moving, the late summer bugs were starting to find me. I lifted myself back onto my feet, trudging forward. If I travelled in one direction long enough, I would have to come across something or someone, right? I didn’t know where I was going, but at least walking felt like I was doing something.

The air was hot and humid in the forest and before long I was covered in sweat and bug guts. The incessant mosquitoes and flies were starting to drive me mad and I ended up spending more time swatting, and less time walking. Being naked really didn’t help. I had bites in places that should ever have been exposed in the first place.

When I finally came across a swamp, I stopped. The surface was stagnant and covered with a thick layer of green duckweed. The smell of rotting vegetation and damp soil filled my nostrils. I needed water badly, but I knew drinking from the swamp was just as dangerous as going without. Frustrated, I was about to stomp off when I got a bright idea.

Walking down to the edge of the water, I stuck my hands down into the muck and drew up a lump of thick, heavy mud. It felt cool in my hands and I started smearing it up my arms. Maybe the layer of dirt would help keep the bugs at bay. Anything was worth a try at this point.

I made sure my whole body was covered in mud by the time I walked away. I probably looked like a friggen sasquatch, but it was worth it. The coating did help to keep the mosquitoes and flies off me as I pushed back into the forest.

As I walked, I took in all the sounds of the woods. For once I found myself appreciating the beauty of it all. The chirping of the songbirds, the alarm call of squirrels echoing through the trees, and the hollow thuds of a woodpecker drilling a hole. Despite being utterly alone, there was life all around me. I smiled again, glad that I had had the opportunity to be here. I wasn’t dead, I had gotten away.

As the sun rotated in the sky, I knew time was slipping by. I still had not come across anything that look remotely like civilization. Worry started to nag at the back of my mind. What happened if I never found a way out of the bush? What if I had been walking in circles? I started to panic before willing my thoughts to change. I just needed to stay calm and keep walking.

Dusk was swiftly approaching when the whiff of smoke entered my nostrils. It was weak but recognisable. I decided to follow the scent trail, hoping it would lead me to a house or possibly some campers. As the scent got stronger, I became more aware of my nudity. Maybe I could use a leaf to cover myself. I laughed out loud, making fun of my own misfortune.

Suddenly the forest opened up and I stumbled out onto a grassy lawn. The soft blades of grass under foot were heaven for my sore feet. I broke into a run, dashing towards the house, no longer caring about my nakedness. A renewed burst of hope filled my chest as I mounted the stairs of the porch and banged on the door.

“I need help!” I called, pounding on the door again.

I heard the floor creak inside as someone approached. The door swung open, and I quieted. The homeowner wasn’t what I had been expecting. The man’s hard brown eyes scanned me over, assessing me with a disconcerting expression. He was tall, broad shouldered and also muscled, obviously someone who made a habit of working out regularly. But it was the tattoos I was staring at. I swallowed nervously at the tats that ran down both his arms. He reminded me of a much younger version of Bill. Backing up a step, I carefully moved down the porch steps, back towards the driveway.

“It’s okay. I will leave.” I squeaked out; my hope deflating like a popped balloon.

“No, stay.” The man replied, his voice stern, commanding. He stepped out of the doorway and onto the porch. I glanced behind him and into the house as he moved. He was cooking, and I didn’t mean food. I connected the dots quickly and realized he probably worked for the same gang as Bill. 

“No… no.” I said too hurried, scrambling down the steps. The man swore, realizing I had seen inside the house. Were there no fucking decent people around here?

As soon as my feet hit the driveway I turned around and ran, stones biting harshly into my soles. I was halfway to the dirt road when the silence was broken by a resounding crack in the air. Before the loud noise even cleared my ears, I was thrown forward onto the gravel.

I knew I was screaming, and I couldn’t stop. Not just because I was going to get caught, but because a fire like no other was radiating out of my shoulder. I scrambled onto my side, flesh grinding into rock. I felt warmth flood down my side, mixing with the dry dirt on my body. There was so much blood.

I had been shot. He had shot me.

My screams turned to cries as I hugged my arm, I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want this to be the end.

“Who the fuck are you?” The man yelled at me. I had not heard him approach over my screaming. He reached down, lifting me by my fucking dog collar. I hadn’t even thought to take it off.

“Please!” I sobbed. “Don’t kill me.”

“Who. The. Fuck. Are. YOU?” He said coldly, punctuating each word slowly. He seemed far too calm and collected for this situation.

“Bryson! Bryson!” I yelled, “Please help me.”

“Who did you escape from?”

Those simple words broke me in half. I knew he was going to send me back to the guys dead or alive. My shoulder radiated pain through my upper body, weakening me against his hold. The blood was pooling in the wound and running down the back of my arm and torso in a stream. Drops of blood dripped onto the driveway, painting the rocks red.

“Holly shit, you’re that kid Bill mentioned.” The man said suddenly, recognition flickering in his eyes. As I looked up, I noticed the gun in his hand and stiffened. He held the black 9mm like it was natural. Like he knew what he was doing and had used it many times before. 

“You’re going to kill me.” I said suddenly, emotionless, the blood draining from my face. The tears stopped and I waited for him to put the gun to my head and pull the trigger.

“I told you not to run kid. This didn’t have to happen.”

I nodded slowly, my face a blank slate as I shifted my gaze to the ground.

He moved quickly then, bringing up the gun in his right hand, and the last thing I felt was my skull splitting open.


	8. Choices

I woke up to pain and yelling. Only this time I wasn’t the one yelling. I was laying on my stomach, still out on the driveway apparently, because the rocks were biting into my body. I shifted and groaned, trying miserably to find a more comfortable position. The pain in my right shoulder was a stark reminder of what had happened.

I should have been more careful. I should have made sure these people were safe before waltzing up to the door and turning myself in.

My eyes opened slowly, taking much more effort than it should have. My skull throbbed and I wondered why I wasn’t dead. And then suddenly I became more aware of my surroundings.

“What the fuck are we supposed to do with him now? He is bleeding out all over your damned driveway. Did you really have to shoot him Chris?”

“Like I had an option Devan, the fucker can run. I was lucky enough to even hit him. If he had run off into the bush…” He let the statement speak for itself.

“Well, you may as well finish the job now. I ain’t taking him to the hospital.”

“That’s why I had Bill call you guys. I’m not putting myself on the line for murder charges again. If you want to finish the kid, do it yourself. And clean my driveway while you’re at it.”

“Don’t you have anyone who can patch him up?” I heard Quinten ask.

“What are you talking about Quinten?” Devan said, frustrated.

“We just got him Devan, it’s too soon to be getting rid of him. If we can get the bullet out, pump him full of antibiotics and stop the bleeding, Bryson might be able to pull though.”

“It’s more work than its worth.”

“There is a guy.” Chris said. “He’s been part of the gang for five years. Patches up our men once and a while, usually for knife wounds but he might know what to do.”

“What does he charge?” Devan remarked impatiently.

“The gang still owes your dad a favour, so call it square. How does that sound?”

There was a moment of silence before Devan agreed.

“I need to make a few calls. I don’t know why the kid is covered in mud, but he needs to be cleaned up. That shit can’t get in the wound. And try to stop the bleeding, there are some old towels in the house.”

“We will get him ready; you just make the call.” Quinten replied.

I heard boots crunching on gravel as Devan and Quinten walked over to me. Quinten leaned down, touching my shoulder to look at the wound. I trembled under his touch. “Come on Bryson, lets get you in the house.” His voice was surprisingly soft as he prodded me to sit up.

“How did you get out here?” Devan asked as I was trying to get to my feet. I was confused by the question.

“I ran.” I muttered, my voice wavering. Quinten wrapped and arm around my waist as we walked slowly towards the house.

“No shit. How did you get out of the cabin?”

I realized then that they hadn’t found Ethen yet. I didn’t know what to say. Devan might change his mind about saving me if he knew the truth. But Devan was smart and he figured it out on his own.

“Ethen fucked up, didn’t he? I knew he wasn’t man enough to deal with you. The guy has potential, but he isn’t willing to do what it takes. Yet. Did you kill him?”

The question surprised me, and I said “no, he’s locked in my room.”

I instantly regretted my choice of words. My room, like my room was somehow already becoming home. Fuck that.

Devan didn’t ask any more questions. Instead, he marched ahead and opened the door as Quinten and I came through. I was beyond exhausted now, not only from the blood loss, but the torment my body had been through in the last two days: the sore muscles, bruises, and cuts from head to toe. It was all too much.

Quinten must have felt me losing strength because he asked Devan for help. I felt the larger man’s hands come around me from the other side.

“Where is the bathroom?”

“Let’s try down here.”

They took me down the hall and found the bathroom on the right. We didn’t stop until Quinten and Devan had me positioned in the tub. I was suddenly feeling cold and my teeth chattered as I shivered.

“Why is he cold?” Quinten asked.

“Probably blood loss and shock. The kid has been through a lot.” If Devan was capable of compassion, that was possibly the first time he had ever shown a glimpse of it.

Devan turned the tap on stuck his hand under the water until it reached a temperature he liked. Pushing down the plug, the water began climbing up the sides. I gasped as the hot water stung me. Nearly every part of my body was marred.

I was sitting with my legs pulled up to my body, my hands at my sides. It hurt too much to move my right shoulder.

Quinten grabbed a facecloth off the rack beside the toilet and started to wipe the mud from my skin. It felt good despite how tender I was. The water instantly turned brown as he scrubbed my leg.

“What the hell did you do? Roll around in a swamp or what? This shit stinks.”

I didn’t say anything about the mud, but it did stink. Now that the crusted muck was getting wet again, the smell of swamp flooded the washroom.

Devan released the stopper, letting the dirty water flow down the drain. I wasn’t even close to clean. “This will take forever, let’s just turn on the shower.” He said dramatically.

“You know that is a bad idea.” Quinten replied.

“Fuck this, I am going to go get Ethen.” I blanched. No doubt Ethen wouldn’t take kindly to seeing me again. Devan walked out, closing the door behind him. Quinten didn’t react, he just wet the cloth and kept on scrubbing.

We were silent for a long time as he scrubbed every inch of me with the washcloth. My skin was more red than white now as the mud fell away to reveal the true extent of the damages. I looked at myself in shock, teeth starting to chatter again.

When Quinten pushed the cloth up my back and around the bullet wound, I cried out, leaning forward, away from his touch.

“I know it hurts, but I need to clean it.” He said firmly. I squeezed my eyes shut and clenched my jaws as he brought the cloth back to my skin.

The door swung open a moment later and Chris stood in the doorway. Now that he could see what I looked like without all the mud his expression held surprise before quickly reverting to indifference.

“I made the call. Troy will be here soon with Bill. Troy wants him prepped and ready to go by the time he gets here.”

“Sure, we are done.” Quinten remarked as he helped pull me up. I stood naked in front of the two men, swaying on my feet. Quinten assisted me out of the tub and quickly toweled me off before leading me out of the room after Chris. It looked like he had cleared off the kitchen table and I was told to sit at a chair. I complied, and then Chris walked over to me with ropes.

“No!” I said instantly, trying to get back up. Quinten shoved me back down, and I gasped in pain. I could feel blood still trickling out of the bullet hole and sliding down my skin.

“Stop fighting. Do you want to survive this or not?”

I stilled, letting Chris push my chest down on top of the table. He then tied me down so I couldn’t move, each wrist securely bonded to the table legs. He walked away and came back with a syringe. I stared at it cautiously.

“It’s a sedative. You’re going to need it.” He wasted no time pushing the needle through my skin and forcing the liquid into the vein of my arm.

Time blended together as I wavered in and out of consciousness for the next several hours. I vaguely remembered seeing the “doctor” show up. At times I had felt a dull sensation as he worked on my shoulder and the feeling of cloth against my skin as the trickles of blood were swept away.

The period of time between being at Chris’s house and ending up back at the log cabin was a complete blank.

I started coming back to reality on the couch. The fireplace was crackling, and I was covered in a thick, warm blanket. Despite the heat I shivered uncontrollably.

“He has a fever.” I heard Quinten say, followed by silence. “Okay, I will do that. Thanks.” I heard a click as he put the phone down on the table.

“Troy says to watch him all night and call him if things get worse. The fever could be from the stress as well as his injuries. He could be getting an infection.”

“We need those antibiotics.”

“I will go to town tomorrow and get some.”

“If he lasts that long.”

I felt hollow, empty inside, as if the doctor had scraped away my soul. If I did manage to survive the night, it just meant I would live to endure their rape again in the future. Maybe I should have begged for death instead.

Quinten sat down on the couch beside me, and I reached out, touching his arm. He was my only source of security, oddly enough. His starling green eyes explored my blue gaze, and he slowly bent down and pressed his lips against mine as his hand brushed my hair. I didn’t resist his touch, letting his tender kiss linger on my lips.

He pulled away then, rising off the couch. I saw Devan, an expression of intrigue playing across his face.

I closed my eyes and instantly fell back asleep.


	9. Trauma

I woke up sometime in the early hours of the night. I was soaking wet and exhausted. My eyes burned holes in my skull as I pealed them open, struggling off of the couch.

“Woah, what are you doing?” Quinten’s tired voice sounded from across the room.

I didn’t have time to respond as I started dry heaving on the floor. I had nothing in my stomach to throw up, but apparently my body didn’t care. I had not eaten since yesterday morning.

“You need to drink some water; you’re probably dehydrated.”

I nodded my head and closed my eyes. I had never felt so bad in my entire life. I leaned back slowly against the couch, still sitting on the floor. I was careful to make sure my right shoulder didn’t touch.

I twisted my neck, trying to get a look at the wound, but it was covered by bandages taped to my skin.

“Don’t move your shoulder, it needs time to form a blood clot. Troy stitched the wound closed, but it could start bleeding again.”

I didn’t plan on moving it. Even sitting still, the throb was unbearable.

“Here.” Quinten carefully picked up my left hand and wrapped my fingers around a glass of water. I brought it to my lips, letting the liquid trickle into my mouth. I swallowed and felt my stomach clench. I was beyond starving, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold anything down.

When I had finished the glass, he took it away. “Let’s get you back on the couch.”

It took an immense amount of effort to get my body to move, but I did manage to slip my bum over the cushion and lay back down. Quinten helped adjust the pillow under my head. My eyes slipped closed against my will, and I drifted back into the abyss.

\---

The next two weeks past by quickly. For the first few days I had been in and out of fever, sleeping the days away on the couch. Quinten played the role of nurse as he brought me food, water, and helped me go to the washroom. They had been letting me eat real food again, but Devan had made it very clear I would be back to dog food as soon as I got better. I hardly ever saw Ethen, who chose to stay out of my line of sight. The odd time I did see him, he would shoot me a glare that stilled my heart and sent chills down my spine.

I was taking antibiotics regularly and they helped in keeping down the infection. Troy had stopped by at least twice to check on the wound and indicated it was healing well. The scrapes on my body had scabbed over and were now falling off. Some of the bruises had turned a faded yellow colour, while the worst ones were still russet blotches. While I looked rough, I was out of the woods so to speak. My body had been given time to heal most of my aches and pains.

But with each passing day, my anxiety began to build. As I gained my strength back, I knew it was only a matter of time before the men would rape me again.

Quinten had not tried to kiss me since that first night I had been shot. I found myself confused by his actions, and no matter how long I spent thinking about him, I couldn’t figure him out. Most of the time he was gentle with me. His touch was always soft, and he seemed to care for me as if I were family. But then there were moments when he would turn it off, as if completely indifferent to my suffering.

Devan was becoming more straightforward and predictable. He had little patience for things that didn’t go his way. Since my injury he had hardly paid any attention to me, as if I were a broken toy that was no longer interesting. But today was different. He had sat across from me on the opposite couch, a hunger in his eyes that made me tremble as he drank his morning coffee.

I knew the time had come when I woke up the next morning. Instead of taking me back to the couch after going to the washroom, Quinten steered me down the hall to the bedroom. Devan and Ethen were already inside, and I started trembling in Quinten’s arms.

“Don’t let them do this to me, please Quinten.” I begged, looking up into his face. His cool green eyes passed over my tortured expression, but he pushed me further into the room, abandoning me to my fate. I sunk down to the floor like deadweight, not wanting to get an inch closer to the bed.

“Your special treatment wasn’t going to last forever.” Devan said. “After what you did to Ethen, you need to be punished.”

“It was a mistake!” I cried, “I don’t need to be punished.”

“You’re right. It was a mistake that you will never make again, especially not after today.”

Quinten turned to walk away, and I gripped his leg instinctively, “Don’t leave me with them!”

“Get off me.” He said smoothly, tugging himself away from my grasp. I stared after him in horror as he shut the door, leaving me alone with the monsters I feared most.

“I’ve had two whole weeks to fantasize about what I am going to do to you.” Ethen said, speaking to me for the first time since I had attacked him.

I crawled over to the corner of the room, wishing I could sink into the walls and disappear. The two men walked over, and Devan hoisted me up by the collar. He was fond of doing that, much to my dismay.

“Seeing as your going to be doing a lot of screaming today…” Devan tailed off, shoving a crumpled sock into my mouth. I tried to spit it out, but Ethen reached over and wrapped duct tape around my mouth and head. My eyes grew wide in panic as Devan yanked the collar down, pushing my upper body forward towards the floor. Ethen grabbed my hands and trapped them behind my back, using a zip tie to keep them there; he synched it until the straps bit into my skin.

From my place on the floor, I looked up at the two men, terrified to find out what they were planning. Ethen walked across the room and shuffled through a duffle bag.

“We have so many new toys to try out.” He said with a smirk, pulling out a black object. He sauntered back over to my corner of the room and twirled the device in front of my face. It was a taser. He wasted no time punching the metal prongs into my bare stomach, deploying a shock. It made the shock collar seem like child’s play as the current of electricity seized my body. Every muscle clenched involuntarily, sending my body into spasms as Devan held me up the by collar. I couldn’t even cry out. My lungs felt frozen in my chest. It was the most brutal, raw pain I had ever felt wracking through me from head to toe. As my eyes started to roll back, Ethen removed the taser.

It took a moment before I could breathe again, sucking in air through my nose and groaning into the gag.

“I think he liked it.” Ethen laughed.

“Couldn’t agree more.”

“Let’s get him on the bed.”

I felt Devan’s hands push under my armpits as he hulled me up and dragged me to the bed, flopping me down on top. I rested on the mattress, trying to recoup my strength.

I heard the bag rustling again as Ethen found something worse to torment me with.

“Let’s loosen him up.” The grin on Ethen’s face was cruel as he stalked towards me. I would have scrambled away if I could. He held a large dildo in his hand. “You ready Devan?”

“Go for it.”

Devan stood over me, his hands pushing down on the middle of my back, sinking me into the bed. I couldn’t see what was happening, but a second later I didn’t need to. Ethen spread me open and drizzled cold lube over my hole before forcefully pushing and twisting the large toy inside me. I screamed through the gag, the sound nothing more than a mangled cry.

My hole had finally healed from the previous damage, but that was all being undone now. I tried bucking against the men, but Devan’s weight was crushing and I had no leverage with my hands tied. With a final shove, Ethen sunk the toy fully inside me, the device bruising my insides. I could feel it in me. He turned it on, and the toy vibrated, sending an immediate wave of heat through my body despite the discomfort.

I felt myself getting hard as blood pumped into my cock from the unwanted pleasure the device was making me feel. I couldn’t believe my body was reacting this way. I struggled and shouted into the gag. I would never enjoy this, even if my body betrayed me.

“You got your knife on you Devan?”

“Yup.”

“I want you to carve our initials into his back while I make him cum.”

“Right on!” Devan said, sounding excited, his hands left my back, but Ethen had a firm grip on the toy, holding me in place. I saw Devan reach into his back pocket and pull out a switch blade, clicking it open. Tears sprung into my eyes as he poked the tip of the blade into my skin.

“You get him going and then I will start.” Devan said.

Ethen turned up the vibrator then, and another wave of heat flooded through my skin. My muscles twitched and I got even harder. Ethen tilted my ass into the air and wrapped his fingers firmly around my cock as he gripped the toy in his other hand. He started stroking me roughly and I moaned into the gag, unable to help myself.

That is when Devan started carving into my right shoulder, the one that hadn’t been shot. I screamed and moaned at the same time as Ethen expertly knew how to play with me and Devan carved letters across my previously unmarred skin. Hot blood trickled across my shoulder and slid down my collar bone, staining the sheets red. The whole time Ethen made sure I never had a chance to lose my erection. He started thrusting the vibrator inside me, making me wiggle in the blood-soaked sheets.

My senses were shot. I didn’t know what to focus on anymore; Ethen’s hand working my dick, the vibrations of the toy making me experience things I had never felt before, or the sharp blade of a pocket knife slicing skin. With a sudden building of tension, I knew I was cumming. I yelled out as warm shots of cum coated my belly and sprinkled the sheets.

I needed more air and gag was suffocating. I tried to suck in deep breaths through my nostrils as my body trembled and my chest heaved.

Ethen yanked out the toy, turning it off and tossing it across the room. Devan was done carving, whipping the bloody blade clean on the sheets. Blood continued to trickle from the wound, creating a pool at the base of my neck and on the bed.

Devan grabbed my collar, chocking me as he lifted me up. The blood now running down my back and over my ass.

To my surprise he ripped the tape off my face and pulled out the sock, which was damp with saliva. I sucked in deep breaths, gasping like a fish before he forcefully kissed me, leaning me backwards on the bed. As my raw cuts hit the fabric, I cried out, but his mouth swallowed the sound. His rough hands explored my body, travelling from my nipples south across my ribs and down towards my hips. I had lost weight in the short time since I had been taken, and now the bones of my hips protruded slightly.

Suddenly he let up and slid off the bed to remove his clothes. I noticed then that Ethen was doing the same. I felt my anxiety climb even higher.

As quickly as he had left, he was back. Devan crushed me under the weight of his kiss, his slimy tongue forcing its way into my mouth. I tried to draw back in disgust, but it was pointless. A moment later the bed dipped as Ethen also got on and travelled up the space between my legs.

“Let’s flip him over.”

I tried to resist as they manhandled me, but in the end they won the battle and I was pushed over onto my stomach. I heard Ethen laugh. “Yikes Devan, my five-year-old niece could have carved better than that.”

Devan didn’t reply. He was too busy trailing kisses down my neck.

Ethen lifted my hips up and spread me open. I squirmed. No matter how many times they raped me, I doubted it would ever get easier to take. But then I felt something slick and cold against my hole. Ethen was smearing lube on me with his finger. He coated his own dick then as well.

When he pushed into me, the friction wasn’t so bad this time. He slid past my ring of muscles with a simple push and I didn’t have to struggle as much to accommodate his intrusion. Compared to Devan, Ethen’s narrow, long cock was much easier to take.

“Get on your hands and knees.” Devan ordered, pulling back from me. Devan stood on his knees in front of me, his fat sword swinging in front of my face.

“What are you doing?” I asked in horror, my voice wavering as I obeyed his command.

“Open up puppy, your master has a treat for you.” He chuckled, pushing the head of his dick into my closed lips. When I refused to open my mouth, he reached down and squeezed the sides of my jaw painfully until I parted my teeth wide enough. Seizing the moment, Devan thrust his cock into my throat, causing me gag.

“Look at you, such a young and inexperienced pup…” He mocked, making me take in more of him as he pushed down on the back of my head. I spasmed as my body tried to reject him and drool flooded out of my mouth. “…In no time you’ll be begging to suck on this bone.”

Devan grabbed a tuff of my short hair and pulled, lifting my head from his dick, giving me an opportunity to breathe. He then started swatting me in the face with it, giving me no reprieve. His glistening shaft left smears of saliva on my cheeks. 

“Please! No more. I’m going to throw up.” I managed to say, begging for some sympathy.

“No, you’re not.” He said in all seriousness.

Ethen started thrusting in my ass suddenly, obviously getting impatient with Devan’s games. I winced and my arms and legs shook with exhaustion. As Ethen’s next thrust pushed me forward, Devan forced his way into my mouth again. I felt the head of his dick touch the back of my throat and I shook even harder, gagging more intensely.

“Thatta boy.” He said in approval, frisking my hair.

The next several minutes went by excruciatingly slow as I focused on simply copping as they used me. I never would have thought I’d be relieved to have Ethen cum in my ass, but to be honest I was. When he pulled out, it was just Devan left to satisfy. I felt weak and dizzy and incredibly nauseous.

“Suck hard.” He commanded roughly, and I did, locking my lips around him firmly. Devan’s thrusting built in intensity as need overcame him and he forced me to deep throat him. I didn’t even need to swallow as his cum shot down my throat. When he pulled out of my mouth, I thought I was going to black out, but I somehow retained consciousness.

Tossed aside like a spent rag, Ethen and Devan got off the bed. They started laughing about something, but I couldn’t comprehend their words. My body twitched as I lay on my side in cum and blood-soaked sheets. My eyes were pealed open in shock and I was having a hard time breathing. The tightness in my chest gained in pressure and I felt my limbs jerking involuntarily.

“Don’t touch him!” I heard Devan yell at Ethen as I flopped on the bed. “He’s having a small seizer. Just wait a minute.”

Even though it only lasted a few seconds, every muscle in my body felt cramped and sore.

“You think we over did it?” Ethen asked.

“Nope. This is exactly what he needed.” Devan replied. "Let’s get out of here. The room stinks."

\---

I was unconscious when Quinten came in sometime later, shaking me awake. I couldn’t move, not even willingly. My body was in too much pain.

“Fuck Bryson, what did they do to you?”

I mumbled, not making any sense even to myself.

“Hey Devan, Ethen! Get the fuck in here.” Quinten yelled out, genuinely angry.

The men walked into the room, freshly showered and dressed.

“I am not your fucking maid. Clean him up! I knew you guys wanted to punish him, but it looks like you took it too far.”

“Don’t tell me you have a soft spot for him?” Ethen retorted. “You know what he did to me.”

“You had it coming you fucking moron!” Quinten shouted.

Angry footfalls thudded across the room.

“I can do whatever I want to that piece of trash. He’s our fuck toy, nothing else. That’s what we agreed on.”

“I didn’t spend the last two weeks keeping him alive for you to fuck him to death Ethen.”

“Calm down Quinten.” Devan said suddenly. “We won’t go so hard next time.”

There was a long pause as the men stared each other down.

“Help me carry him Devan. I’m not strong enough to do it myself.” Quinten’s voice took on a more contained tone. It seemed the fight was over.

“I was going to come clean him up.”

“Sure you were.”

My eyes were open, but I was hardly responsive as Devan wrapped me in his arms and lifted me off the bed with a grunt. My arm hung listlessly off to the side as he maneuvered us out of the bedroom and towards the washroom. I had shut down inside, retreating into a safe space in my mind.

Bending over, Devan carefully placed me in the tub, rested my head against the wall. I was sure his sudden caution had more to do with Quinten staring daggers at his back than an actual concern for me.

“You go fix the bed Devan, I will wash him.” Quinten suggested, sounding deflated.

“Sure.” Devan grunted, getting back to his feet.

Quinten knelt down beside the tub as Devan left, his hand rising slowly to my face. I leaned into the palm of his hand. We sat like that for a long moment before he lowered his arm and turned me, searching for the source of blood. Quinten’s fingers trailed over Devan’s rudimentary carvings. “They’re fucking idiots.” He said under his breath.

I didn’t respond in any way. I couldn’t. I was numb. I was vacant. I was void.

Quinten washed me, the blood spiraling down the drain. I hardly even twitched as he cleaned out my wounds and bandaged my skin. He towelled me dry even though I was still laying in the tub.

Devan reappeared at the door. “How is he doing?” he asked quietly.

“Not good. I think he is in shock. I want you to carry him to my bed. I am going to lay with him for a while.”

Devan pushed his way into the washroom as Quinten backed out to make room. Devan’s strong arms wrapped around me again, lifting me up almost effortlessly. My head sagged back over his bicep as he carried me into a new room. The lights flickered on and I was gently placed on the bed. The mattress was soft under me, not like the firm one I had been given.

Quinten turned on the heater and crawled in next to me. I didn’t react as he hugged me to his body, placing his arm under my head.

Devan threw the covers over us, shaking his head as he left.

I knew Quinten was trying to talk to me as his thumb slowly stroked the side of my face, but I couldn’t be reached right now. I just wanted to curl up under a rock and die. How could my life have taken such a horrible turn? I wanted more than anything at this moment to be back at home with my parents. To be in the comfort of my own room. I wished I’d never felt the urge to seek independence and move away for university. I had been so wrong about everything.

An hour must have passed before Quinten gave up and slipped off the bed, leaving me in a catatonic state. Outside the room, the men talked.

“Look guys, he won’t come around at all.” Quinten said.

“Yah, fine. We went too hard on him. He’s probably super vanilla.” Ethen said, frustrated. “I just wanted revenge.”

“If he doesn’t start coming around in the next hour, I’m going to phone Troy.”

“Are you fuckin insane?” Devan shouted.

“Well then fix this.” Quinten responded coldly.

“I will go in there.” Ethen said suddenly, as if regretting what he had done.

Footfalls thudded on the wood floor as Ethen came into the room, crawling onto the bed as Quinten had done earlier.

“Hey Bryson?” He said, his tone no longer mocking. “We went too far okay? We won’t go that hard on you again. Just say something please.”

I still didn’t react. His bullshit lies didn’t register with me. I was safely behind a mental wall where no one could touch me. No one could hurt me. There was a chasm so deep no amount of empty promises could fill it. He shook me gently.

More time passed and Ethen eventually left and was replaced by Quinten again. As his arms wrapped around me, he placed a soft kiss on the top of my head. The simple act of genuine affection was what started to break down my defenses. The barrier between me and him began to crumble. He was talking to me again, telling me how Devan and Ethen had made a mistake in taking things too far too soon. That they should’ve known it would be too much for me to handle. His words didn’t help much, but his soothing voice did. He felt nice. The heat from his body radiating into my own flesh was comforting. Suddenly I started to shake, soft cries escaping me. The first sign of response.

Quinten quieted, letting me cry on him. I brought an arm over his stomach, hugging him against me. Why wouldn’t he protect me? Why wouldn’t he help me get away? I was not of their world. I was far too innocent and naive to be doing the things they expected of me.

My eyes were closed when I felt the unexpected bite of a needle being pressing into my arm. Quinten had been careful to make sure I hadn’t noticed what he was doing. I instantly felt betrayed by him. Why would he do that? I lifted my head, looking up into his green eyes.

“It’s okay Bryson. It will help you.”

He depressed the plunger, the mysterious liquid rushing into my veins. I felt its effects almost immediately and a blissful glaze glossed over my eyes. I felt like could forget everything as the hurt faded away.


	10. Broken

When I woke up, soft morning light penetrated through the window and shone onto the bed. I was cuddled against Quinten, his breathing soft and shallow. As I lay beside him, I almost forgot who he was, and what he represented. He was one of my captors, one of the monsters. But was he really the same as Devan and Ethen? Quinten didn’t actively participate in raping or humiliating me, but he didn’t try to stop it either. What was in it for him? What was Quinten waiting for?

Memories of the night I was abducted flashed through my mind. He had been an eager participant in the beginning. So, what had changed? Had anything changed? All I knew was that Quinten was quickly becoming the only positive thing in my life. The only one I could trust. I knew it was false, that it was dangerous to think that, but it didn’t change how much I needed him. I needed him to be there for me. I needed to know that at least one person cared and was looking out for me.

I watched him sleep, a peaceful expression adorning his face. He was handsome, that was easy to admit to myself. I didn’t have to be gay to recognize a good-looking dude when I saw one. That also puzzled me. With his physique there would be no shortage of willing women, or even men, to faun over him, so why me? Why choose to stay associated with Devan and Ethen and risk being sent back to prison again? Nothing made sense. But then again, I was trying to find logic in a situation that was completely illogical to begin with. Could I really expect men like them to make rational choices? Obviously not.

My experiences over the last two weeks were fucking with me psychologically, I knew it. I wasn’t strong enough to resist the physical or emotional manipulation. I had no life experiences under my belt so-to-speak to prepare me for what to expect or how to cope. To give myself some credit, I didn’t think most people would ever be prepared for something like this. Who left their house everyday prepared for the possibility they could get abducted, raped, shot, and cut up?

I found myself wishing I could look into Quinten’s green eyes as I watched him sleep. Was my growing attraction towards him real? Or was it something more fucked up? I assumed the latter, but, even so, my feelings towards him remained and it tormented me.

My hand travelled slowly up the bedding until my fingers hovered just above the bare his skin of his chest. I felt the sudden urge to touch him, to feel him beneath my fingertips.

Resisting, I let my hand fall back to the bed. What was happening to me? I had never been interested men before. I bit my lip, uncomfortable with the new emotions and urges settling into my body. Despite what I knew was right and wrong for myself, I wished I could lay here with him all day. I didn’t want him to leave me alone. He provided me with a meager sense of security in the fucked-up hell hole my life had become. 

When I looked up to see his face again, he returned my gaze, watching me. I stilled, my heart fluttering in response. I hadn’t notice him waken, or maybe he was never actually asleep. Those green eyes were warm as I stared back. Without thinking, I raised my hand again and touched his chest, my fingers barely tracing against his skin. My eyes lowered, examining his smooth square jawline before shifting my gaze across the definition of his neck and the muscles of his shoulders and bare chest.

I thought he was going to push me away as he moved, bringing his arm up from under the covers, but he merely rested his hand on top of mine, flattening my palm against him. I looked back up to eyes as he bent forward, kissing me softly. I froze as mixed emotions flooded my body. Fear. Distrust. Dependency. Lust? Against my better judgement, I leaned in, curiosity and some bizarre sense of need overcoming me. In this moment, Quinten made me feel safe and I didn’t want to let that go. His hand left mine as he brought it up to cup my face.

I felt my lips part and his tongue slipped into my mouth. When Devan had done that, I had been instantly repulsed. But my reaction with Quinten was different. I didn’t exactly enjoy it, but I didn’t hate it either. It was new for me and I didn’t quite know yet how I felt about it. He sensed my hesitancy and remained slow and gentle as he explored me. As his tongue withdrew, I attempted to push my tongue into his mouth in order to explore him, and to my surprise he let me. I felt my skin grow warm as we embraced, and he shifted, positioning his body closer to me.

We continued to kiss, both of us taking it slow as Quinten gave me time to feel him. I didn’t know what I was doing, or if it was okay, but in this moment, it felt good and that mattered to me.

As the seconds passed, our bodies melded together as more of our skin connected. By the time I realized what was happening, Quinten was straddling me, his hands moving up my stomach as he leaned forward overtop of me.

I felt my pulse begin to race as I entered deeper, more unfamiliar territory. I had only ever experienced Devan and Ethen forcing me to do things I didn’t like. Quinten didn’t seem like he was going to hurt me, but I was still scared. My hand started to tremble, and he pulled back, understanding mirrored in his eyes.

“Shhh…” He said, gradually moving off of me and laying back on his side. “I’m not going to force you. I want you to want me.” He said softly.

“You’re not going to force me? Like Devan or Ethen?” I asked cautiously.

“No, I won’t.”

I fell silent, contemplating what that meant for me. Could I willingly give myself to Quinten in exchange for his limited compassion? Was it a compromise worth making? It didn’t feel like that much of a sacrifice right now. The things Devan and Ethen were doing to me were much worse. At least with Quinten I could keep some semblance of control, even if it was really just an illusion. 

“I do want you.” I said softly, making my decision. “But Devan and Ethen hurt me… I. I don’t know if I can.”

“I don’t want to hurt you Bryson. I can help make it feel better for you.”

I let out a shaky breath, willing myself to calm down and allow my body to relax against him. I wanted to believe him; I really did. Just hearing those simple words was a reprieve: I don’t want to hurt you. But my body only knew pain thus far, and so I wasn’t very convinced.

Even though I felt tears pull at the corners of my eyes, I leaned forward and kissed him again, letting him know he had my permission. Quinten moved slowly, picking up from where we had left off. His leg passed over me and straddled my waist and he leaned forward, kissing my neck softly. His tongue traced the edge of my collarbone, making me shiver. I felt myself growing hard in response. As Quinten leaned forward against my stomach, I felt his erect cock brush against my skin. Despite his need, he remained slow, careful, and in control. He was dominating, but a completely different way. In a better way. 

As he kissed me, he leaned to the side, grabbing a package from the nightstand and slipped a condom over himself. I didn’t ask why, assuming he had his reasons. I hoped Devan or Ethen hadn’t given me any diseases. 

I didn’t trust myself to speak, and Quinten didn’t want to push me. As his hands travelled lower, I arched my back off the bed, giving him access to my lower back. His touch felt good and it had the effect of reducing the tension in my body.

I knew I had tears briming my eyes as he turned me over underneath him. I tensed, but he didn’t take advantage. Instead, he waited for me to relax again as he trailed his fingertips down my spine, leaving goosebumps across my skin. Quinten was careful not to disturb the bandages on my shoulder. The scars forming underneath the white gauze would forever remind me of how vicious Devan and Ethen could be. But Quinten helped me to forget that, if even momentarily.

As my body relaxed again, I felt him move lower until he touched my ass. I let out a ragged breath, trying to stay relaxed, but my body instinctively wanted to resist.

“You will be okay Bryson; I’m not going to hurt you.” He said again, and I nodded. I still wanted to do this.

He angled me towards himself, and I felt him press delicately against my entrance. I was still sore, but the condom was lubricated, and he prodded inside me gradually, giving my hole time to get accustomed to what he wanted. I groaned, both from pleasure and discomfort as he entered me fully. “Are you okay?” He asked, pausing. I couldn’t speak. I didn’t want him to hear my broken voice. I nodded my head, allowing him to continue.

He brought his hands across my back. “I will go slow.” He said, not fully drawing out before pushing in again. I soon forgot the bruised feeling of my hole as he worked inside me. I had never had the chance to feel anything other than pain and fear, and now Quinten was starting to show me something different.

I grabbed my own throbbing cock as he thrusted, matching his rhythm with my own. We both came at the same time; I heard him moan in pleasure as he stilled on top of me. Pulling out, he removed the condom and handed me some tissue, which I used to quickly clean myself.

As he fell back on the bed, he reached out and trailed a hand over my cheek. There was guilt in his eyes as he looked at me. Was it guilt for having just had sex with me? Or was it guilt for forcing me to be here against my will? If it were the latter, I knew pleading with him to let me go would only turn him away from me.

We laid in each other’s arms for some time before Quinten rose off the bed and walked out the door and into the hallway. I felt unsure about what had just happened between us. I couldn’t deny the sad feeling of having just been used.

When he came back, he held two coffee mugs in his hand. He smiled when he saw my sad expression turn to pleasant surprise. “For you Bryson.” He said handing me a fresh mug of coffee as he sat down on the bed. I starred into the mug with great relief. I blissfully took my first sip, cherishing the taste and smell. I didn’t want to take it for granted knowing that Devan wouldn’t be so lenient.

“Thank you.” I said when I finished the mug.

He took it from me and indicated I could go to the washroom if I wanted. I got up, walking slowly out into the hallway. I felt Quinten follow behind me. When I was done, I thought he would take me to my room, but he steered me towards the living room instead.

As we rounded the corner of the hallway, I saw Ethen and Devan at the kitchen table having breakfast and I instantly coward back into the hallway, hugging my body. I couldn’t look at them.

Quinten turned to me and brushed my hair with his hand. “It’s okay. You don’t have to worry about them right now.”

I shook my head. It was never going to be okay.

“What’s going on?” I heard Devan say, getting up from the table. I scrambled back to Quinten’s room and hid on the bed before the man could find me.

“You really scared him Devan.” Quinten said in a disapproving tone. “You should show him you’re not a complete asshole all the time.”

“You really do have a soft spot for him.” Devan said simply. He didn’t sound angry, only intrigued. I heard the man’s louder foot falls come down the hallway before stopping at the bedroom door.

“Come on Bryson, do you want some breakfast? If you come out to the kitchen you can eat with us.”

I felt my chest seize with anxiety. Was it a trap? Devan had said I would only be allowed to eat dog food. He saw my hesitation and said, “this isn’t a trick. I will make you a deal okay? From now, on if you’re on good behaviour you can have food with us. If your bad, you will get the dog food. Quinten told me you were really good this morning.” I nodded my head, eyes haunted as I stared at him, waiting for him to suddenly change demeanour. But he didn’t and I slowly climbed off the bed.

Devan walked back to the kitchen and I followed. Quinten placed a comforting hand on my back as he guided me to an empty chair. He refilled my coffee, setting it down beside me before placing a plate of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast before me. Picking up the fork, I tried to still my hand as I ate. I was so nervous I wanted to throw up. But I kept going, pushing through my physical reaction to the two people who sat across from me.

The three men talked casually as I ate, and the normality of it all stunned me. These men had abducted and tortured me, and yet they could act as if nothing was out of the ordinary.

When I finished my plate, Ethen got up and asked, “Did you want more bacon? You’ve been losing weight; you should eat more.”

I didn’t look at his face as I nodded my head. He reached across the table, grabbing my plate. I saw the faded bite mark I had left on his arm. “I’m sorry.” I said softly and Ethen hesitated, surprised by my words. It took him a moment to realize I had been referring to the scars I had inflicted on his arm.

“It’s in the past now.” Ethen said smoothly, removing my plate from the table and walking across the kitchen. I didn’t want him to be mad at me anymore. I couldn’t live through another episode of what they had done to me yesterday.

When Ethen returned with my plate, I ate slowly, feeling the taste of the bacon on my tongue.

“I’ve got to go out for a few hours. Bill has some things he wants me to do.” Quinten said, casually talking to Devan and Ethen.

“Since when are you working for Bill?” Devan asked, surprised.

“I need a job, and Bill offered me a good opportunity. Before I got canned, I was doing something similar back in BC anyway.”

“Alright, maybe I will take Bill up on his offer then as well. I know the gang wants me back. I didn’t want to jump back in so soon, but it has been a few weeks.”

“You think he would let me join?” Ethen said.

“I don’t see why not. They’re always looking for new members, and we can vet you. I will talk to him today.” Devan replied.

Quinten got up, pushing his chair back and started to put the dishes away. I was done with my plate now, and slowly got up, following him to the sink. I could feel Devan and Ethen’s eyes on me as I walked, but I didn’t make any sudden moves. Even though there were knifes on the counter, I didn’t let my gaze linger on them as I handed Quinten my plate and walked back to the table.

When he finished up, he grabbed the keys off the counter and walked towards me, bending low, and kissed me on the cheek. I didn’t resist, letting his soft lips press against my skin. And then he was gone, the front door closing behind him.

Suddenly I felt very alone.

“Did you and Quinten have sex this morning? I didn’t hear any screaming.” Devan remarked, his tone barely masking a mock.

I really didn’t want to answer him, but I knew he would only get mad if I didn’t. I felt my skin flush with heat as I nodded my head.

“Huh.” He said, impressed.

Ethen was looking at me with genuine surprise. I wanted to hide under the table from the feelings of shame. They had taken my small amount of comfort and freedom and turned it into another form of humiliation.

“What should we do today hmmm? Quinten will be gone for a while.”

The anxiety I had felt earlier came racing back.

Devan and Ethen got up from the table at the same time, their thoughts going to the same place. I left my chair, backing up slowly into the living room as they came around the table.

“Don’t be a bad Bryson.”

Ethen’s mocking words just heightened my anxiety.

“Please!” I said, “I can’t do it again.”

“Well, you did it this morning, so you must be fine.”

“No, no, no, no…” I mumbled as Devan grabbed my collar and roughly led me to my room.

“We won’t be as rough this time, I promise.” He said excitedly, pushing me to the bed. I didn’t believe him for a second.

Ethen was already taking his pants off when Devan released me and started doing the same. I sat on the edge of the mattress, all emotion leaving my body. I could feel myself shutting down again as my mind retreated back to its safe place.

“Get on the floor.” Devan ordered, and I complied. “You are being a good puppy today. Quinten was right.” He laughed, roughly patting my head. I didn’t react, waiting them to get it over with.

“On all fours.” Ethen commanded, and I knelt forward, my hands braced out in front of me. Ethen knelt behind me, and Devan knelt in front.

“This is going to be hot.” Devan said in a low voice, his now erect penis hovering in front of my face. Horror at what I knew was coming almost broke my resolve, but I managed to shut it out. I shut down everything. There was no avoiding the fact that I was about to be their fuck toy again. 

As Ethen spread me open, Devan ordered me to open my mouth. He shoved his cock into the back of my throat as Ethen’s penis delved into me. I trembled and gagged against them, my hole burning as Ethen roughly forced himself inside me. My muscles were tight and tense, making things hurt. Devan’s huge cock slammed back into my throat and I tried to breathe as I gagged again. He gripped my hair, and I brought my hands up, digging my fingers into his arms.

“Your doing good puppy, now suck and lick. You here me?”

I nodded my head. My lips closed around him as I did what he wanted. I felt tears slide down my cheeks in response. I was repulsed with myself. As Ethen started hammering into me, Devan’s cock thrusted deeper. I was having a hard time coping. Would I not have a hard time coping? I couldn’t breathe between the gagging. The food in my stomach threatened to come up with every thrust. The minutes felt like hours as the men used me. When Ethen finally came in my ass, and Devan unloaded in my mouth, I was shaking uncontrollably. Devan forced me to swallow his cum, the salty substance lingering in my mouth and trickling down my throat.

I crumpled to the floor to the floor as they pulled out.

“Let’s clean him up this time. Wouldn’t want Quinten to come home and get all pissed.” Devan laughed, hoisting his pants back up.

“Let’s hose him off outside. It’s a nice day to give the dog a bath.” Ethen joked.

Devan bent down, grabbing my collar and hulling me back up onto all fours.

“You’re gunna crawl out outside puppy. If you try to get up or run, I will beat you and make sure you eat dog food for the rest of your very short life.” His tone was deadly serious as he gripped me.

“Y-yes!” I cried out, and he let go of my collar. Naked and trembling, I followed them out of the room. My knees became sore as they landed against the hardwood floor.

I was crying again by the time we reached the front door, but neither man changed his mind. Ethen kicked me in the ass, and I scrambled through the door and down the balcony steps, trying not to fall forward.

“This way puppy.” Devan laughed, walking around the side of the cabin.

The dirt and rocks from the driveway bit harshly into my knees and hands as I crawled. Ethen kicked me again, making me go faster.

When I was in place, Devan came around with a garden hose and I cringed. I knew how cold the water would be, even before it hit my skin. Devan pinched the stream with his thumb, making the water pressure rise as it pressure washed my body. I tried to get out of the spray, but Devan just followed me with the hose. I cried out as the water slammed into my privates, shriveling my cock and balls and smarting my flesh. But Devan didn’t relent. He made sure every inch of me was soaked before turning the hose off. I was shivering like mad, the brisk September air further chilling my frozen skin.

“You know Ethen, my dad used to have a dog. I wonder if we still have that old doghouse somewhere.”

“I’ll watch him; you go find it.” Ethen said smiling.

“Can I please go inside?” I said through blue lips and chattering teeth.

“No.”

I waited on all fours in the wet dirt until Devan came back, hulling an old wooden doghouse behind him.

“It was in the basement.”

He dropped it at the bottom of the porch steps in front of the cabin.

“Inside. Now.”

I hesitated. I would barely fit in the small, cramped space. My hesitation caused Ethen to kick me harder this time. I crawled, bending my body to squeeze through the entrance and curl into a tight ball inside.

Devan left for a few minutes before reappearing with a thick metal chain. He reached into the doghouse to clip one end to my collar before tying the other end to the balcony.

“If you escape Bryson, I will hunt you down and slit your throat, no matter where you run. I will find you and kill you. I will also kill whoever tried to help you. Do you understand me?”

“Y-y-e-e-ssss.” I chattered, my body shivering uncontrollably. The cold chain pressed against my skin, making me freeze even more.

“Let’s go inside Ethen. He can stay out here for awhile.”

The two men left, mounting the stairs with heavy thuds before shutting the front door.

I was miserable, and cold. So, so, so, cold. I closed my eyes and hugged my body tighter for warmth. The water in my hair dripped slowly down my back. The worst part about my situation however was the realization that all I had to do was reach up and undo the dog collar and I would be free. But I didn’t dare touch it. Devan was testing me, and no doubt watching. I believed him when he said he’d kill me. He’d killed before.

I was breaking inside. I knew it. I could feel it. The odds of me returning to who I was just over two weeks ago was quickly fading away. Alive or not, I felt like I was dying inside. My only way to survive was to be the dog Devan wanted me to be.

My muscles became sore and stiff as I froze in the cramped space. My fingers could barely bend the joints were so rigid. I thought I might die of hypothermia before they remembered to come and get me. The time ticked by like a millennium, and not once did the front door open. Not once did they even check to see if I was still here. My hair was dry now, but I still couldn’t stop shivering. The sound of my teeth chattering filled the small space.

When the sound of tires crunching over gravel and the groan of an engine drew near, and I hoped that it was Quinten coming back. My heart surged in relief at the prospect. He would let me out of the doghouse. But I knew I was mistaken when the vehicle came into sight. It was a truck, not an SUV rolling up the driveway. I pushed my head down against my knees. If Devan didn’t kill me for running away, I would die of hypothermia for sure. I could feel the cold chill seeping into my bones.

I cringed as I recognized Chris hopping out of the truck and walking towards the cabin. He was about to mount the steps when he happened to notice me in the doghouse. He paused, stopping to squat down and peer inside at me. I looked at him with one eye, not moving.

“Come out Bryson.” He said, his voice tight. I didn’t know why he cared. He had shot me only two weeks ago. I tried to crawl out, but I was too stiff. I couldn’t seem to get my joints to unfurl. He watched me struggle before reaching in and helping to pull me out.

“Damn, your so cold.” He said, his hands were like a hot radiator against my frozen skin. The metal chain clinked as I tried to push against him for warmth. I was beyond desperate.

“What’s this?” He said, pulling the soggy bandage off my back. I heard him suck in a breath as he saw the raw carvings on my back. “H-help me.” I chattered, my voice barely a whisper.

“I will take you inside. I won’t let them put you back out here while I’m visiting.” He said, his voice sympathetic. He tried to get me to stand up, but my back muscles seized with the effort.

When we did finally make it up the stairs, he opened the door without knocking and led me inside. Devan looked over form the couch, a pissed expression coming over his face. “What are you doing Chris?” Referring to me.

“Kids’ almost frozen to death Devan, give me a break.”

“Whatever. Come here Bryson.” Devan said, motioning for me to join him on the couch.

The warm air from the living room prickled at my skin as my flesh heated and I hobbled over to him. He pulled me onto the couch beside him, wrapping an arm across my chest. My teeth chattered and I shook hard despite the warmer air. “Toss me that blanket Chris.”

A moment later Devan draped the blanket over me. My head rested against his shoulder and I closed my eyes as the men began conversing and forgot about me. As the warmth gradually chased away the cold in my muscles, I found myself growing incredibly tired and I leaned into Devan further; in response he pulled me down into his lap and stroked my hair. 

I fell asleep minutes later, curled up against my worst nightmare.


	11. Hollow

I woke to the sound of the front door slamming closed. I jolted upright on the couch, my anxiety instantly rising. Devan seemed irritated about something. His shoulders were tense as he stood in the kitchen, looking out the window. Chris had just left.

Ethen was sitting at the table busy eating dinner. I wondered if I would get to eat dinner with them. I had done everything they wanted. Devan had said I was good earlier in the day.

I sat all the way up, the blanket falling off my shoulders. I was glad to finally be warm again. The chill had left my bones and the nap had given me some strength back.

“Good, you’re finally awake.” Devan observed, but I knew I was somehow in trouble. His voice was too tight. Too low. Too angry. I didn’t know if it was something I had done, or if he was just angry at the world in general. He stomped further into the kitchen, taking a bowl out of the cupboard. But instead of giving me real dinner, he reached under the sink, pulled out the bag of dog food and dumped some putrid kibbles loudly into the bowl. He put it on the floor and pointed at it. “Dinner time. Come. Now.”

“But I was good today!” I cried, unable to help myself. What more did he want from me?

I instantly knew had pushed my luck and Devan kicked the bowl so hard it shot across the kitchen, spraying kibbles everywhere.

“Woah! What the hell Devan?” Ethen shouted at his unexpected outburst.

Devan quickly moved across the room, coming directly for me. I was terrified. I instinctively pushed deeper into the couch, pulling the blanket up to my face.

“You know what you little fucker?!” He yelled at me, grabbing my collar and ripping me off the couch and onto my knees with a thud. “I am getting real fuckin’ sick of your attitude.”

He literately dragged me to the kitchen by my neck, the leather collar biting into my windpipe and effectively strangling me as I slid across the floor. My hands were gripping his wrist, trying to get him to let me go.

When we got to the kitchen, he bent over me as I struggled to breathe, only slightly letting up on his hold. “Look here Bryson. You are a fucking _dog._ Nothing more, nothing less. I fuck you when I want to fuck you. Ethen fucks you when he wants to fuck you…. And who knows about Quinten. But if Quinten wants to fuck you, you let him. No more crying. No more talking. No more resisting. You are a fucking dog. Do you understand? If I say you are a bad dog, you don’t ever, ever, talk back to me. You do as I say, when I say it, no matter what it is. You live for our pleasure, nothing else. Do you hear me?!”

He was screaming in my face and I was shell shocked. I trembled and coward from him, not daring to utter another word. If I did, he would probably kill me right here and now in the kitchen with Ethen still eating his dinner.

Devan let go of my collar and kicked me harshly in the stomach and I sagged into the floor, gagging.

“Now eat your fucking food. And don’t you dare use your hands. Dogs eat with their mouths.”

He kicked me again in the hip and I fell to the side. Devan all but ripped his chair back from the table and sat down. Ethen had a huge fat fuckin’ grin plastered all over his face. He was enjoying the show. Sadistic fuck.

As soon as I could move again, I did.

On all fours, I took my time crawling around the kitchen trying to find where the balls of puke had scattered off to. My lips jutted out whenever I found one, pulling it into my mouth. I tried not to look to closely, knowing there could be hair or dirt stuck to them. There was no way Devan would let me clean the kibbles off. He would probably say something like… _Do dogs clean their food? No._

I didn’t cry, but I did feel absolutely crushed and humiliated. Devan was never going to let me be anything more than a pathetic dog to him. Something less than human. Something not deserving of respect and dignity. I hated it. I hated it so much! But I couldn’t fight him and futile attempts at resistance wouldn’t get me anywhere other than the grave. That would be a last resort. Maybe I’d be able to regain some of my pride before I died.

I didn’t know if I would ever see freedom again. I felt myself giving up in my heart. Each day I became more broken, more dog. Less human, less Bryson. I hadn’t even resisted this morning as Devan and Ethen had fucked me. I was disgusting. I didn’t even deserve to be anything other then what they wanted me to be. How could they have turned me into something so pathetic so quickly? Was I really that easy to break and manipulate? The more I learned about Devan and the bounds of his cruelty, the more I felt that I would be unable to find freedom. The consequences of another failed getaway were incomprehensible. Did I have the courage to try and pull it off? The consequences associated with not trying to escape were also grim.

When I was done eating, I sat back on my haunches as a dog would, giving into my roll. If I didn’t go along with it, my treatment would undoubtedly get even worse. I didn’t want to get punished anymore than I had to. My exposed dick hovered just above the floor for all so see, but it didn’t matter anymore. I had been naked for so long now that it would have felt weird to suddenly wear clothes again. I waited for Devan to acknowledge me. My gaze was unwavering.

When he did finally look at me, his expression was softer, not as angry as before. He slapped his thigh and I crawled over to his chair, sitting on the floor beside him. He sunk his fingers through my sandy colored blonde hair.

“That is how a good dog behaves Bryson, here.” Devan tossed half a sausage onto the floor and my mouth watered. I leaned down, biting pieces of it off with just my teeth. When I was done, I sat back up and remained sitting beside his chair. That was when Quinten walked through the front door. 

I refused to look at Quinten as he sauntered in, kicking his shoes off, and throwing his keys on the counter.

“What’s with Bryson?” Quinten asked Devan as he spotted me on the floor.

“He’s learning what it means to be a good dog. Bryson here just needed a few pointers.”

Quinten didn’t say anything, not objecting to my treatment. He accepted Devan’s decisions. I tried not to let myself think about it. I couldn’t dwell on anything right now if I wanted to maintain even a resemblance of sanity.

“Tell Quinten why you were a bad today Bryson.” Devan said tersely, his hand brushing my head again.

“I-I don’t know.” I said, genuinely confused.

“Bryson let Chris bring him in from his new doghouse today. Must have given the man some sad little puppy eyes because I know for a fact Chris is a tough nut to crack. He doesn’t feel sympathy for just anybody.”

Devan’s fingers balled into a fist in my hair and he yanked my head back so that I was forced to look up at him. 

“If I say you stay in your doghouse, you stay there. No exceptions. If I leave you out there until you freeze to death, then you freeze to death. Next time someone decides to take pity on you, you better think twice about accepting it because I will beat the living tar out of you.” I quivered, knowing every word he spoke was true. This man truly frightened me.

“You tied him to the doghouse? He could have gotten away Devan.” Quinten said, instantly pissed off. “That was stupid.”

“Look who’s still here? Bryson isn’t going anywhere. He knows I would kill him, even if it was the last thing I did.” He let go of my hair then, and I reverted to staring at the floor. My chest felt tight and I clenched my teeth in angry frustration.

“How was your first day working for Bill?” Ethen asked, changing the subject.

“Good enough. He had some guys show me the ropes. I spent all day learning how they conduct business. The operation is large, but for now I am just going to be doing basic deliveries. Bill said he won’t let me move up for a few weeks at least.”

“All the new guys start off at the bottom, don’t worry about it.” Devan said, sitting back in his chair.

“You mentioned Chris came over today. What did he want?”

“Oh fuck. He wants me to do a hit. I just got out of prison, not keen on going back quite so soon.”

I the sudden urge to laugh bitterly, but I bit my tongue to hold myself back. I questioned if that was actually a legitimate concern given my presence in this cabin. The hypocrisy killed me.

“That’s interesting. Who’s the hit?”

“Some piece of local trash, ‘been stealing drugs from Bill.”

“Did he say how it had to be done?”

“No. I have free reign.”

“Just accept it, we need the money. There are some remote lakes a few hours north of here where we can dump the body. The body will be mostly fish food by the time someone finds it, if they even do.”

Ethen laughed, getting up from the table. “I agree with Quinten. I will help you off the guy and dump the body. You can teach me a thing or two. I want to learn.”

“Fine. I will let Chris know it’s game on.”

I couldn’t believe they had just casually agreed to kill a man. Suddenly, I realized how fragile my existence really was. I didn’t mean anything to any of them. They really could kill me whenever they wanted.

I felt Devan’s hand smooth out my hair and a shiver ran down my spine.

\---

Tonight, I was sleeping in my own bed with the door to my room wide open. Devan was tempting me on purpose again. He was looking for a reason to hurt me, I could sense it in my bones. I couldn’t sleep as I stared out into the hallway. I could get up right now, run through the house and back into the bush. They would never find me in the dark, not tonight at least. But I was spent, both emotionally and physically as depression at my soul. 

I hadn’t thought about my family in a few days. It took enough effort to try and just survive in the present moment. My parents, my friends, my life plans… they all seemed so distant and foreign right now. So unreachable. I realized that even if I ever were to be rescued, I could never go back. I would never be the Bryson those people remembered. The Bryson they would want and expect me to be. I was officially damaged goods. Really damaged. The type of damaged goods you toss in the garbage.

I felt hollow, that chasm in my chest swallowing me whole. My emotions fluctuated between wanting desperately to get away and not wanting to be found at all. The shame was unbearable. I wanted the people in my life to remember the Bryson they had known and loved. I wanted them to cherish those memories of who I once was and could have been. I didn’t ever want them to meet the dog that I had been forced become. The toy that Devan and Ethen had so easily turned me into. I was just repulsive.

I said goodbye to myself, both in body and spirit as I sat up in the bed, my back resting against the wall. I wanted to stay feeling empty because empty meant I could survive. Feeling emotion was too painful, too raw.

I got up suddenly, walking numbly out of my bedroom and down the hall. I grabbed the blanket off the couch and walked out the front door, closing it softly behind me. I squeezed myself into the doghouse, pulling the blanket inside with me. This is where I belonged right now. This is where the dog belonged.


	12. Preparations

With the blanket curled around me, I slept surprisingly well. The tight space had acted as a tent against the late-night frost and the blanket was thick and warm. I had it pulled completely inside, wrapping myself in a cocoon with my face sticking out for air.

As dawn broke over the horizon, the chorus of singing birds woke me up. There was a mist beginning to rise from the ground as rays of light heated the frozen vegetation, evaporating the frost. It was simply beautiful. I sat completely still, staring at the rising mist as the sun continued to creep higher in the sky.

It must have been around 7:00am when I heard someone yelling. Devan had probably come into my room for his morning blow job and realized I wasn’t there. I smirked. I knew it wasn’t funny, but I couldn’t help it. He would probably be pissed when he finally found me. But how mad could he really get? I was doing what he wanted.

A second later I heard the door to the Cabin get thrown open. More than one set of footsteps sounded on the deck.

“You’re too cocky Devan. What made you think it would be okay to leave him alone like that unguarded? Now we’re going to have to spend all day looking for him. If he makes it to the police… we’ll be as good as fucking dead for the life sentences we’ll be receiving.” Quinten remarked. His usual calm and collected demeanor was shaken up.

“He won’t make it to the cops. I will kill him before he manages to get anywhere. I will gut him like an animal and let him watch his own innards fall out as he dies.”

I grimaced, really glad that had not decided to run last night, or this morning.

“You want me to call Chris? he can come help us look.” Ethen said.

“No. He doesn’t need to know the kid got away again. Makes us look bad.”

I decided then to move, pretending I had been asleep and was just now waking up. My head hit the roof of the doghouse, making a dull thudding noise.

“What was that?” Ethen said.

“What?” Devan bit back.

Footsteps pounded down the balcony steps as Ethen came to investigate.

“For Christ’s sake Devan, your fucking puppy is in his doghouse.”

There was dead silence before Devan came down the steps. He couldn’t see me, but he could see the blanket through the front entrance.

“Damn.”

“Fine, whatever.” I heard Quinten mutter, retreating back into the cabin.

“Come out Bryson.” Devan commanded, but it wasn’t angry.

I pushed the blanket out the hole, giving myself room to maneuver. The cold air bit my skin as the warmth fell away from me. Poking my head out, I looked at Devan. He was squatted down, his gaze just above eye level.

“C’mon.” He said again, encouraging me to get out. I complied, my sides scraping against the wooden entrance as I leaned out and crawled towards him. He reached out and I bent into his lap, rubbing my head against his chest as he ran his hand down my back. I shivered under his touch both from anxiety and something else I couldn’t quite pinpoint. My nerves were always on edge around him. I never knew when he was going to snap.

“Isn’t that cute.” Ethen mocked, watching Devan and I embrace.

“You are mine Bryson.” Devan said softly, ignoring Ethen. I looked up into Devan’s face. He was staring at me like new prized possession. He had broken me, and he knew it.

“You mean _ours._ ” Ethen said carefully.

“No, I meant _mine._ You and Quinten can still fuck him whenever you want, but from now on I am his owner.”

“Sure, whatever. It doesn’t change anything for us.” Ethen said, turning away and walking back to the house, leaving me and Devan alone.

I was still looking up into Devan’s eyes when he bent forward and kissed me on the forehead. It was new kind of kiss. Not the brutal, demanding kind he had given me in the past. It was gentler, almost affectionate. I was confused. This man wasn’t capable of compassion. I knew him. This was something else, something I had yet to figure out.

“Let’s go inside.” He said, standing up as I sunk back to all fours.

I gingerly climbed up the stairs after him as he opened the front door. Quinten glanced back from where he stood at the stove, the smell of breakfast was thick in the air. My stomach growled as I crawled across the floor after Devan, my master. I didn’t like thinking about how he owned me. How I was a slave to his every desire. But it was unavoidable.

“C’mon, have a shower with me and then I will feed you.” His tone had improved, as if he were talking to a pet that he liked rather than distained.

I didn’t hesitate as I crawled after him towards the washroom. I knew instinctively he would molest me in the shower and most likely fuck me or make me suck him off, or both. But I was resigned for the time being. As long as he didn’t beat me, I could do it. I could give him what he wanted. The part of me that cared about my dignity had died last night in the doghouse.

I sat back on my haunches in the bathroom as he shut the door. His clothes fell to the floor and he turned on the shower. The air became humid from the warm waterfall behind the clear shower curtain. He got in first and then signaled for me to come in next. I didn’t know if he wanted me to stand up or keep crawling. I decided crawling was the safest option. I struggled over the tub, legs flopping down behind me. Devan didn’t say anything as he reached down and tugged up on my collar. I got to my feet, keeping my hands at my sides submissively.

Devan’s lips pressed down on the back of my neck as he brought his hands up, bringing them in front of my chest and pulling me closer until my back was snug against him. I felt like a child in his embrace. 

His right hand moved up my chest and his fingers curled around my neck. He kept a firm grip, but it wasn’t strangling. He wanted me to know who was in charge, who was in control. I didn’t resist and his left hand moved from my chest down to my junk. I gasped when he grabbed me. His large hand enveloping my balls and dick with the same pressure he was using on my neck. I trembled slightly, praying he wouldn’t hurt me down there.

“You’re such a good puppy.” He whispered into my ear. I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself. “I knew you would be perfect from the moment I saw you.”

The shower felt hot and claustrophobic as our bodies meshed together. Devan loosened his hold on my junk, but he didn’t let go. He let my balls slip from his grasp and started massaging my dick. My jaw clenched as I felt myself responding to his touch. I was getting hard, despite everything I was feeling. What was he up to now?

“I know you need release.” He murmured in my ear, his right hand still holding my throat. I whined, the sound of a dog wanting to please its’ master. He rotated me around so that I was facing him, and then he knelt down before me. His hands settled on my hips. I looked down, shocked as I realized what he was going to do. He brought me into his mouth and I instantly let out a moan as his warm lips closed around me. The flat of his tongue stroked up my shaft and played with my tip teasingly. Having never had a blowjob before, it felt absolutely amazing. My thighs shook with pleasure. I reached out and grabbed the wall for support.

When he pulled back and I almost cried out with need.

“I am only doing this for you once Bryson. I want you to pay attention. I want you to memorize how I work your cock, because this is how you’re going to suck me from now on. Do you understand?” I nodded my head quickly. There was no way I would ever forget this. It felt so good, I needed him to keep going.

He moved over me again, making me moan. When he went all the way down, he didn’t even gag as he sucked, pulled, and licked. I closed my eyes and took in the sensations. I could feel the head of my dick pressing into the back of his throat. My hands gripped Devan’s hair suddenly, warning him of what was coming. He didn’t pull back though; he kept bobbing vigorously until I shot my load down the back of his throat. He swallowed without hesitation. I leaned back against the shower wall as my dick left the warm embrace of his mouth. No wonder he was always trying to strangle me with his cock. Now I knew how good it felt.

Devan stood up and pulled me off the wall, turning me around so that my back was facing him again. I braced myself as he brought my hips to an angle he liked. I voluntarily spread my legs.

“See, you’re starting to get the hang of this Bryson. Before long, you’ll be a champ.”

He thrust himself into my hole and I stifled a yelp. The pain was starting to feel familiar. After several agonizingly long minutes he started to climax. As he grew in vigor, he wrapped his fingers around my throat go bring me upright against his chest as he unloaded up my ass. We were both breathing hard by the time he pulled out.

“You know the drill.” He said, turning me around to face him and pushing me down to my knees. I took him in my mouth and licked him clean despite the fact we were in the shower. It was this act I probably hated the most. Washing the vile, disgusting remnants of his deed off with my mouth. The taste and smell were putrid. When his dick was clean, I stayed on my knees as he lathered my head with shampoo. His strong fingers worked my scalp and the massage felt good, helping me get over the nausea.

“Rinse off and soap while I finish up.” He said, and I did what he asked. When the shower turned off, he towelled me dry first before himself. I wasn’t allowed to do anything without his explicit permission, that much was becoming crystal clear.

“Your hair is getting too long; I don’t like it. Lean over the sink, I’m shaving it off.”

I complied. Hair was the least of my concerns.

Devan pulled out an electric shaver and started moving it over my scalp. He was surprisingly careful not to yank out my hair when the device slowed down in spots. When the buzz cut was over, stared at my reflection. I was nearly unrecognizable. I looked like a half-starved animal with vacant eyes. My bones were more pronounced than they should have been, indicating my level of malnourishment and deteriorating condition. My freshly shaved head only made my overall appearance sicklier.

“How are we going to put weight on you? Your too damn skinny.” He said, following my gaze in the mirror. I knew it wasn’t a question he wanted me to answer. “Breakfast time.”

I completely hid all signs of enthusiasm as he opened the door. I sunk back to my knees and crawled out to the kitchen. I sat beside his usual chair as he took out a bowl and filled it with kibbles. My supreme level of disappointment lessened when he took the bowl and moved over to the stove, mixing the kibbles with eggs, bacon, and sausage.

I was salivating by the time he put the dish down. Crawling over, I jammed my face into the bowl, trying to get the food into my mouth. It wasn’t easy however, my nose kept getting in the way. Frustrated I pushed the bowl across the floor with my face until it hit the wall, where I could use the resistance to get it in my mouth.

Ethen was laughing at the table. Devan and Quinten had a bemused smile on their faces. I refused to care about how they found amusement at my expense. Not caring meant no more humiliation and shame.

“Did you have a good shower?” Ethen asked, still chuckling.

“Oh, yes we did.”

“All I could hear was moaning and grunting.” Ethen couldn’t stop laughing.

“He knows who he is now.” Devan muttered before turning to Quinten, a smirk playing on his face. “I broke him in for you Quinten. I know you didn’t want to get your hands dirty.”

“Fuck you Devan.” But he laughed with the guys, and it hurt me. I thought I had discarded all my emotions, but it still stung. Especially since it was Quinten laughing along.

I tried to use my tongue to clean up my face to no avail after I had finished eating. I was a mess. Quinten got up from the table, grabbed the washcloth from the sink, and sauntered over to me. I tilted my head towards him as he wiped the grub off.

When I was clean again, he tossed the rag back in the sink and sat back down at the table.

“So? We still having Ethen and I’s recruitment party tonight?” Quinten asked. I perked my ears at their conversation. Party?

“Shit, I forgot. We need to go to town and pick up some stuff. Booze, music, drugs ‘n food.” Devan replied.

“You can go with Ethen. I need to go out and work for Bill again till about four. I will have someone come pick me up so you can take the SUV.” Quinten said. I sat puzzled. They were going to leave me here alone?

“What do you want to do with Bryson?” Ethen asked, cluing in at the same time.

“He can stay here and guard the house.” Devan laughed. “He isn’t going anywhere, don’t worry about it.”

Quinten and Ethen shot me a look of suspicion, but Devan didn’t waver in his assessment. He knew me better than I knew myself.

“Okay then, let’s get going.” Quinten said, pulling back his chair. The guys cleaned up and headed out, leaving me sitting on the floor of very quiet cabin.

\---

I sat staring at the front door for ten minutes before I moved. What was I supposed to do? I knew Devan and Ethen wouldn’t return for at least a few hours. I moved from the floor to the couch, finally standing up. Sitting on the couch felt odd, and so I moved back to the floor. Another ten minutes went by before I stood up again and walked out the front door.

The sun hit my skin as I walked out onto the deck. It felt nice to have the rays of sunshine heat warm me, especially since I found myself fighting off the cold so often. I ran down the steps of the porch, picking up my blanket from the doghouse and returned to the balcony. I laid out the blanket before getting on top.

Devan had mentioned guarding the house, so guard the house I would.

Two hours later I was blissfully sun tanning when I heard a vehicle come up the long, forested driveway. I sat up, getting onto my haunches. My brows furled as I analyzed the newcomer. It was a red four door car, not something I had ever seen at the house before. I was instantly cautious. Was this a test? Had Devan set me up to see what I would do?

A man I didn’t know got out of the car. He was about my size, possibly only a year or so older by appearances. He had short blonde hair and was wearing cut-offs with a white tank. A cliche silver chain hung from his belt.

As the man neared the house, I positioned myself in front of the stairs. He stopped when he saw me.

“Woah? What the fuck dude. Put some clothes on.” He laughed awkwardly, adverting his gaze in genuine surprise. I didn’t make any attempts to move or say anything. I watched him closely, analyzing everything he did.

When he noticed I wasn’t reacting, he looked back to me awkwardly. “Okay? I am just here to see Quinten. Bill wants me to give him some stuff for tonight.” He sounded unsure, wierded out no doubt by my bizarre presence. I still didn’t respond. I was a dog. Dogs couldn’t speak. Devan would find out if I spoke to him. I knew it. This guy was with the gang and couldn’t be trusted.

“Dude? What the fuck is wrong with you?” He said, growing frustrated with me. He tried to move up the stairs then, and I blocked his way.

“Get out of my way.”

I growled, a deep throated warning.

“Okay, you’re seriously fucked in the head. You stupid or something?” He moved up another step, as if testing the boundaries between us. I didn’t know why he wanted to get to the door so badly. He should have known no one was here. I could see the tension building in his body, and alarm bells started going off in my mind. I didn’t know what was happening, but my instincts told me not to let him get to the door. There was something off about him, something desperate. I realized then he looked like a junkie.

I growled again, and he reached for something behind his back. I lunged forward off of my hind legs, trying to attack him before he had time to pull the concealed weapon on me, but he was quick. I push him down the steps violently as he swung the hunting knife, the blade slicing the surface of my left arm. It instantly burned, but I had felt worse.

I thought he was about to come charging back up the stairs, but instead he backed off. “Freak!” He shouted vehemently as he retreated, getting back in his car. I didn’t move from my current position until after he was gone. Letting out a shaky breath, I looked down at my arm. It was a shallow cut, but there was a lot of blood. It was streaming down my forearm and dripping off the tips of my fingers. The crimson droplets sprinkled the wooden deck.

Not wanting to wreck the blanket, I decided to sit on the top step as I cradled my arm protectively. I could have gone into the house and looked for something to wrap it with, but I didn’t think Devan would approve.

An hour later the familiar rumble of the SUV sounded up the driveway. I remained sitting on the porch step as they pulled up and parked.

Devan and Ethen hopped out, walking around to the trunk to unload the supplies they had bought in town. I was nervous as I sat on the steps. My chest was now sticky with blood from holding my arm close to my body for so long. Blood had also dripped onto my thigh and down my leg, forming into a small pool on the wooden step. It definitely looked much worse than it actually was. The wound itself was already almost clotted, only a bit of blood still leaked out of the deepest part of the cut.

The men walked up to the house together, joking until Ethen spotted me. “Shit!” He said, dropping the bags and running up the steps. “What the fuck happened?” I looked down until Devan appeared a few seconds later. He grabbed my arm and looked at the wound. “It’s a knife cut. Did you do this to yourself?” He asked, angry. I shook my head and said timidly, “you said to guard the house.”

“Jesus Christ! Who came here?” He ordered.

I shrugged my shoulders meekly, “I don’t know. A man. Like me, with blonde hair. Maybe a junkie.” I didn’t feel comfortable talking to him. It felt strange after being silent for so long and never being allowed to express myself.

“What was he driving?”

“A red car.”

“Maybe the guy your supposed to make the hit on Devan? He drives a red car.”

“Yah, possibly.” Devan said seriously, his brows knitting together. “You’ll be fine Bryson. I will get this stuff in the house and then come clean you up.” I nodded my head, moving off the stairs to wait by the door.

“What do you think he wanted?” I heard Ethen ask as they went to go pick up the bags again.

“Who knows. Maybe he will show up tonight and I can off him in the bush.” He joked.


	13. The Party

Quinten walked through the front door at four thirty. I was getting nervous as the guys set things up for the party. I couldn’t help but wonder what was instore for me. Devan and Ethen never ceased to amaze. Their fucked-up fantasies came in all shapes and sizes.

Devan had patched me up like he had promised, throwing me back into the shower before wrapping my arm. Some blood had seeped through the bandage at the beginning, but it was dried now.

When I had looked in the mirror again, I had noticed the bruises on my face were finally gone. I sported deep purple blotches under my dog collar, however. Those bruises were never given an opportunity to heal. Devan was strangling with me with it daily. I also had a round blotch by my abdomen where Devan had kicked me in the stomach yesterday. Otherwise, the initials carved into my back were scabbed over. I found the drying flesh itchy and irritating, but I resisted the urge to scratch. I didn’t want the scars bigger than they needed to be. The bullet wound was completely closed. I would have looked like a roughed up bad ass if I weren’t so thin and timid.

“What’s happening with Bryson? I don’t want him naked when people start coming over. Too many questions.” Quinten said, looking at me.

“I guess you’re right.” Devan replied. “Hey Ethen? You’re more his size. You got something he can wear for the night?”

“I will go take a look.”

Ethen headed down the hall, disappearing into his room at the far end. A few minutes later he came out with some clothes and tossed them on the couch. “Put these on.”

I was crawling over to the couch when Devan snapped at me. “Get up Bryson. I don’t want you crawling around tonight.”

I stopped and stood before continuing to the couch. Looking at Ethen’s clothes made me uncomfortable. I put on the underwear first, the cloth instantly felt foreign and constraining. God, how did I ever like wearing this? I pulled at it with my hands, trying to make it feel more comfortable. I tried on the jeans Ethen had provided next, but they fell back to the floor. My hips were too slender to keep them up. I put them on the couch and tried on the shirt instead. It was a grey tee with some abstract design on the front. It was a loose fit, but it would work.

“The pants don’t stay up.” I said in a soft voice, getting their attention.

“You need to talk like a man Bryson. These people coming tonight, I don’t want them asking questions. Can you do that?” Devan asked sternly, looking at me hard. I honestly didn’t know if I could. He had broken me, destroyed me, and now he wanted me to be a man again? He saw the uncertainty plastered all over my face. “Answer the question.”

“I-I don’t know.” I tried to talk louder this time, but I stumbled over my words. 

“Well, you better try as hard as you can. I will beat you after the party if you fuck it up. If anyone asks, you’re my nephew who just got outta prison with us okay? That’s your alibi. Only a handful of people know who you really are, and they will be watching you. Don’t think for a second any of the other guests will help you escape. I will find out if you say anything.”

I nodded my head obediently.

Devan took the pants from the couch and handed them back to Ethen. “You got anything smaller? He can’t walk around in undies all night.”

“I will have another look, just give me a sec.” He replied, putting pop and chips down on the table before taking the pants. It was going to be a big party. A minute later he disappeared down the hallway again. When he returned, he held out a different pair of jeans and a belt. “Try these.”

I put them on. They were tighter, but still too loose. Ethen looped the belt through the holes and synched it tight. “There, you look fine now.” What I looked like was a kid who’d lost weight and was too cheap to buy new clothes. But it satisfied Ethen and Devan, so I was content.

As the men finished setting up, I stood off to the side, trying to stay out of the way.

“Can you stop pulling at your dick? It looks stupid. Don’t touch it again.” Devan barked, and I startled. I had been absently tugging at my crotch, trying to loosen the hold the underwear had on my junk. I pulled my hands away. A minute later I was itching to pull on it again. Goddamn. I tried shifting my legs when Devan was turned away.

“I can see what you’re doing Bryson.” Quinten laughed, putting a huge stereo on the kitchen counter. “Just leave it okay?”

I nodded my head. I needed to find something to distract myself with. “Do…do you want help?” I asked, trying to speak more confidently.

“Sure, you can bring all this food outside to the BBQ.” He said, pointing to the stash by the fridge. I went over, grabbed an armload of stuff, and walked out the front door. Devan was prepping the BBQ now, scraping the grill off with a brush. I put the food down on the patio table and walked back in for the second load.

I had just set down the last bag of food and burger buns on the table when I felt Devan’s hands grab my collar. “I almost forgot to take this off.” He said, twisting it around to find the buckle. I reached up; I didn’t want him to take it off, I would feel naked without it. He swatted my hand away like a pesky house fly and undid the clasp anyway. The thick leather fell away, and his fingers roughly massaged the bruises on my neck. “Go put this on your bed. You can put it back on after the party.” I walked away, taking the collar from him.

When I got to my room, I closed the door and crawled onto the bed, suddenly overcome with paralyzing insecurity. I was really nervous about the party. I didn’t want to be around anymore people like Devan, Ethen, and Quinten. I also didn’t want anyone to see me. I feared the thought of having to try and act normal and sociable. Devan had utterly destroyed who I was as a person. He had turned me into his obedient, mindless fuck toy animal. That wasn’t the sort of thing I could hope to bounce back from on a whim. Couldn’t he just lock me in my room? I was genuinely scared. I couldn’t just change. He had made me into this disgraceful creature, this thing. I didn’t want him to beat me though, and so I had to try.

After awhile, when I hadn’t reappeared, Quinten opened my door and walked in. He sat on the end of the bed, regarding me with a sympathetic expression. “You can do this Bryson. It’s just for tonight.”

I bit my lip. He knew Devan had broken me and it would be difficult for me to put the pieces back together. “I can’t do it.” I said, defeated.

“Don’t let Devan hear you say that.” Quinten smirked. “I’ll you what? I will get you a hard drink, so your nerves let up.” He got off the bed. “Come on. Devan’s getting pissed that you’re still in here. Don’t make him mad, okay? Do you like rum or whiskey?”

“Whiskey and coke, please” I said as I untangled my legs and followed him out.

It was getting close to six o’clock now and anytime people were going to start arriving. Ethen was setting up an I-pod, which would plug into the base of the stereo. I hadn’t heard music since the day I had been taken.

I shifted nervously, really feeling anxious as Quinten went to the kitchen to make me a drink.

Quinten popped some ice cubes into a red beer cup and poured a shot of whisky in before unscrewing a new bottle of coke. He filled it up, the fuzz rising to the top. “Drink this slow. You look like a lightweight and you haven’t eaten since this morning, have you?” I shook my head as he handed me the cup. “I want you to eat at least one burger once Devan fire’s up the grill. I don’t care if you want to or not.” I nodded my head. I wouldn’t have said no to the burger anyways.

I walked to the couch, slowly sitting down before putting the rim of the cup to my lips. When was the last time I had drank alcohol? Back in July? I remembered the house party I went to during the summer, and the girl I had met there. She had been so beautiful, so fun. If I hadn’t planned on moving to Calgary at the time, I would have tried to ask her out. Those possibilities seemed incomprehensible to me now.

The memories hurt and I held back tears as I drank. Despite Quinten’s warning, I downed the cup. I was buzzed right quick as the hard liquor hit my system. I leaned back in the couch and let it numb my thoughts and feelings. I didn’t want to think or feel. I just wanted to exist.

I pushed off the couch, working my way to the kitchen where the bottle of whisky sat calling my name. I quickly poured myself another hard drink before the guys came back in from the deck. I was sitting on the couch again when Quinten sauntered back inside. “You takin’ it slow?” He said pointedly. I nodded. What would he do? Get Devan to beat me? I took another gulp.

Ten minutes later I finished my second drink. I was definitely starting to feel drunk already. Ethen rushed into the cabin, tripping on the lip of the front door, stubbing his toe. He swore, limping into the kitchen. Suddenly I couldn’t stop laughing. It felt good to laugh. I hadn’t laughed in weeks. “What the fuck Bryson? Stop laughing. It isn’t funny.” Ethen said, pissed. I tried to kill it, but I was still grinning. “Your drunk?” He observed. “Quinten didn’t give you that much. I watched him pour it.”

I didn’t care. I stopped smiling though. My eyes got hard and I glared at Ethen. “So, what?” I stated, my voice sounding stronger, almost challenging.

“Don’t lip me off.” Ethen said, turning to finish what he started. They were giving me a lot of leeway right now, and I was starting to take advantage.

Quinten and Devan walked in next.

“Alright, we’re set up. People should be coming soon. You good Bryson?” Devan asked in all seriousness.

“Yup.” I stated, not giving a shit. He gave me a warning look and I turned my eyes away. Even drunk I wasn’t going test my luck too much. Not yet at least.

Quinten must have suspected something because he suddenly strode over and pulled me off the couch. I stumbled; balance totally shot. “Geeze, you’re drunk already. No more alcohol for you. Parties not even started yet.”

I grumbled, falling backwards onto the couch.

“I don’t care if your drunk Bryson, you just don’t do anything stupid. Got it? Don’t do anything you will regret if you know what I mean.” Devan said sternly. I lifted my empty cup in his direction. “Damn kid.” He muttered, but he left me alone.

\---

It seemed like everyone started to show up all at once. I was sitting on the couch in my happy place when cars and trucks started filing in and parking out front. The men and women who got out weren’t the type I was used to partying with though. These were hard people, weathered by poor life choices and shitty circumstances. I looked down at my hands. I wasn’t exactly a soft city boy anymore either.

Shifting on the couch to look through the window, I spotted Bill and Chris in the growing crowd outside. They knew who I really was.

My solitude only lasted a short while longer before some guys I didn’t know walked in through the front door. “Hey.” One guy said, nodding in my direction. It was a normal human gesture; I should have expected it. Now that strangers were here, I felt my insecurity bubbling to the surface despite the fake confidence provided to me by the alcohol. Even though I had clothes on for the first time in a long time, I felt like these people were able to see straight through to all my scars and defects. 

I forced myself to stand up and move over to the table, trying to seem casual. Normal. “Bryson.” I said, shaking his hand. My voice sounded steady, but too tight. Too constrained and forced. “Wade.” He said, not seeming to notice my tone. He was a ginger with short, spiked hair, heavily jelled. It looked good on him. Wade’s friends didn’t pay me much attention, going straight for the goods. I was relieved.

“You work for Bill?” He asked, “Never seen you around before.”

 _Maybe that’s because I am always naked and getting fucking raped by Devan and Ethen._ I thought to myself bitterly but instead said “Nope. I just moved here.” My anger giving me a boost of confidence.

“So, you live with Quinten, Ethen, and Devan?”

Why was he asking so many questions? Wade was just trying to make polite conversation, but I wanted to crawl desperately back to my room and hide under the covers. Maybe I would opt for Devan’s beating. “Yes.” I said simply.

I started pouring myself another drink. I could still feel too much, think too much. I knew I should ask Wade a question, that was what a normal person would do. I struggled to find some words. 

“How long have you been working for Bill?” I asked, forcing the sentence from my lips.

“Almost a year.” Now that he knew I wasn’t working for Bill, I doubted he would offer up much for details.

“You live around here?” I asked next. I had always got the impression the cabin was deep in the woods, far away from other residences. But maybe I was wrong.

“It’s a good twenty-minute drive, give or take. I live out by south side.”

I nodded my head, pretending I knew where that was. I was finished pouring my drink, “Talk to you later, I’m going to check out what’s going on outside.” I suddenly declared. That was probably the longest sentence I had spoken yet. I started in on my new drink as I awkwardly turned away, heading out the door.

I could immediately smell the tell-tale scent of beef cooking on the BBQ as I walked out the door. Devan was standing by the BBQ, a group of guys talking to him. Everything looked so… normal. People were laughing and conversing, having a good time. I scanned the area for Quinten and found him talking to Chris. Ethen was over speaking with some guys I didn’t know.

What was I supposed to do with myself? I felt awkward, like an outsider. It was a weird feeling. Before being taken I had always been an outgoing guy. I had never had a problem fitting in.

Leaning back against the exterior of the cabin, I sipped my drink and watched.

I was still watching everyone in solitude when a familiar red car came up the driveway. Heat washed through my skin as a flash of stark anxiety hit my system. _Please don’t be him._ I thought over and over. It was. The junkie threw the driver’s door open and got out. I quickly slipped back inside the cabin before he had an opportunity to spot me.

Once through the front door, I briskly walked to the washroom and shut the door. If this guy saw me, I knew he would make a scene. He would say something. I put my cup down by the sink and unloaded my bladder into the toilet. Fuck. I was so screwed. I needed to let Devan know he was here, but I didn’t have the balls to try and get to him through the crowed of people. I decided then I would just retreat to my bedroom. For me, public humiliation far outweighed the consequences of getting a beating. 

As I opened the door and stepped out into the hallway, I froze mid-step as I saw the junkie pouring himself a drink in the kitchen. My heart dropped as our eyes met. He recognized me instantly. A nasty smirk crept over his face as he shouted across the room, “Hey, whaddya know? You can wear clothes? Who knew?!”

A burn of shame heated my face as several people stopped their conversation and looked towards me. I was going to ignore him and walk to my room in defeat when he said, “You guys are into some kinky shit aren’t you? I bet you like it when they fuck you like a dog.”

I lost it. Utterly fucking lost it. Lost it as in redlined. Lost it as in Bryson took a dive off the deep end. I lunged across the room, the speed of my movements even surprising me as I pushed the table violently out of my way, drinks and snacks flying everywhere. It didn’t phase me. The junkies face was all I concentrated on as I reached him, slamming my fist into his gut. He had been too slow to respond this time, not expecting me to react in such a way in front of so many people. I distantly heard cheering and hooting as I beat my fucking fists into the junkies’ face. When he fell to the floor, I leapt on top of him, biting his neck with my teeth. I felt blood on my tongue, and I liked it. I fucking _liked it._ I wanted to kill him. I wanted to fucking wipe his existence from my life.

The junkie managed to pull the blade out his back pocket as I assaulted him. The noise in the room was deafening now, the crowed going nuts. When I saw the knife, I grabbed his wrist with my quick reflexes, stopping him before he could thrust it into my gut. We were two rabid animals fighting to the death.

Suddenly I felt a thick arm wrap around my neck as someone hulled me back violently, ripping me away from the junkie. The man pinned me against him, my head in his vise grip. I was shouting and struggling, trying to get back to the junkie on the floor to finish what I’d started. I wanted to rip his eyes out with my fingers. It was only after another guy stood in front of me, blocking the view of my prey that I finally quieted down, the adrenaline leaving by body as quickly as it had appeared. It was then that I realized Devan was the one holding me.

I instantly stiffened, the blood draining from my face as dread flowed through my veins. I had done it now. I had made a scene. Actually, I had more then a scene. I had made a movie. No one was going to be forgetting this anytime soon. Devan was going to fucking kill me or make me wish he would. I started shaking in his arms as I realized what could now befall me.

The noise in the cabin had died down, people watched us excitedly as they wondered what would happen next. I licked my lips, cleaning the man’s blood off my face. Quinten and Ethen were helping the injured man from the floor. His shirt was splattered with blood around the neck where I had bit him. His nose also looked broken.

“The fucking freak bit me!” He exclaimed, his fingers touching the indents my teeth had left. I looked up from Devan’s hold and smirked. The junkie startled at my expression. Suddenly Devan was hulling me off the floor and dragging me down the hall. I didn’t resist as he threw me into my room and slammed the door shut.

“What in the serious fuck was that?!” He yelled at me, his fist meeting my face. My head rocked back with the force of his punch, and I stumbled backwards. “I told you not to do anything stupid!” He was livid.

I crawled quickly to the corner of the room, cowering from his voice. My confidence was shattered, and I shook like a newly born fawn.

The door to my room was thrown open again as Quinten and Ethen strode in.

“Don’t do anything to him right now Devan, people can hear you. We will deal with this later.” Quinten said. “Bryson fucked that guy up pretty good, someone’s driving him home right now. We need to get Bryson back out there so people don’t start asking questions.”

“Fucking Christ.” Ethen muttered.

Chris appeared in the doorway then. It was a whole fucking convention at this point.

“What was that about?” He inquired roughly.

“Yah, what was that about Bryson?” Devan asked. It was more like a command.

My jaw hurt like a bitch as I started talking. “He-he was th-the one from earlier.” I stumbled. “He s-started saying things about me in front of people. Said I liked being fucked like a dog.”

“You do like being fucked like a dog.” Devan muttered angrily, but he knew what I meant. The junkie had been blowing my cover. “Get the fuck up.” He ordered, and I stumbled to my feet. “You get out there and play it cool. Don’t you dare cause another scene. Everyone at this party will remember your face now.”

Devan grabbed my arm and tugged me across the room, throwing me out the door and into the hallway. “Make sure you guys watch him close for the rest of the night.” Devan remarked, and the three other men nodded in approval.

I tried to piece my composure back together as I walked down the hall. When I entered the main living area again, my gaze was as hard as steal. I walked straight through the room and out the door, moving to the BBQ. I wanted a fucking burger. I may as well enjoy the few hours of life I had left to live before Devan was able to get his hands on me again.

The noise of the party quickly resumed. The fight was over, and so peoples attention turned to other topics of interest.

“That was some crazy shit in there.” A familiar voice stated. I turned to see Wade smiling at me. “No one likes that guy anyway, don’t worry about it.” I grunted, peeling a beef patty off the grill and onto the open bun on my plate.

“Was what he said true?”

I stared at him, hard.

“Woah, never mind man.” He said, backing off. But I saw the suspicion in his eyes. Great. Now everyone at this party probably thought I was gay.

I walked away, ignoring Wade as I left the balcony and walked around the side of the cabin, where I could eat in solitude.

\---

The party finally ended late in the night. By my guess it was at least two in the morning. I had been sitting on the couch for awhile now, nursing my sore jaw. I was going to have a fresh bruise there. So much for my face finally starting to look normal again.

When the last car left, my three tormentors walked into the cabin and shut the door.

I released a long breath, trying to steady myself as Devan sat down on my left and Ethen on my right. Quinten leaned back on the opposite couch. I sucked in a sharp breath as Devan casually wrapped his hand over the back of the cushions, his fingers rubbing my shoulder in a circular motion. The room was too quiet. Too still. I felt like prey being circled by predators.

I was completely sober again, having not had another drink all evening.

“What are we going to do with you?” Devan murmured. I didn’t move a muscle. I didn’t want the predators to move in for the kill.

“You know Bryson, I am not that mad anymore. It was good you shut the asshole up before he could say anything else.”

I didn’t relax at all. There was something else coming, I knew it. It was in his tone.

“But you had too much fight in you. I saw the look in your eyes before I pulled you off him. I need to make sure that fire is put out, permanently.”

I did start quivering then. I felt like crying out that it hadn’t been me. It had been the alcohol. I would never do it again. But nothing came out my lips. I was frozen with fear.

“Despite what happened tonight Bryson, you are a dog. You don’t get to feel anger; you don’t get to feel anything. You don’t get to make choices. I make choices for you.” His voice was dangerously low. “Do you understand?”

I nodded my head, tears brimming my eyes. I really didn’t want him to hurt me.

He got off the couch, Ethen standing up with him.

“Go to your room, put your collar on and strip.” Devan ordered.

I got off the couch and walked slowly to my room. Once inside I gingerly picked my collar up from the bed. Once I put it back on, I knew Bryson would disappear again. The bit of humanity I had scraped together tonight would be smothered. My hands trembled as I brought it up to my neck and synched it against my skin. Once the clasp was buckled, I lifted the grey shirt from my body, letting it fall to the floor in a heap. My hands moved to the belt buckle, and I fumbled my pants open. They fell to the floor around my ankles. I was standing in the room alone, in nothing but Ethen’s underwear. My thumbs slipped beneath the waistband and I lowered them, taking them off slowly.

When I was completely naked, I sat on the bed… and waited.


	14. Death

It wasn’t long before Devan and Ethen walked in. I remained sitting on the bed, my shoulders hunched, and my gaze cast towards the floor. If I didn’t resist they would finish beating me sooner, or so I believed. Ethen put a duffle bag down on the floor across from me and unzipped it. A crushing blanket of depression settled over me. The last time Ethen had brought a bag into my room, it had been the worst experience of my life. I tried to keep my composure, but I couldn’t stop myself from breathing heavier.

Devan kneeled down in front of me, carefully pushing up my chin so that I was gazing into his blue eyes. “The last two days you have been good Bryson, and I want you to know that. But tonight, me and Ethen are going to break you completely. We are going to snuff out whatever fire is left burning inside you.”

Horror washed over my skin, sending red hot prickles of fear through every inch of my body. I had never heard Devan talk like this. His tone was almost regretful, sad. I started crying, tears sliding down my face as I looked back at him.

“Don’t look at me like that Bryson. This needs to be done.” His words alone were breaking me, and the torture had not even begun.

“Here.” Ethen said, putting some things on the bed beside me. I didn’t look. I couldn’t look.

I cried softly as Devan picked up a small package, breaking it open. A set of ear plugs fell into his open palm. What did he need earplugs for? He squished them between his fingers before reaching up and pushing them into roughly into my ear canals. I felt the foam expand, cutting off my ability to hear.

I was becoming terrified now. What was happening? What were they going to do to me that required earplugs? I started to hyperventilate as I sat on the edge of the bed. Devan reached up and put a palm on my chest. I was crying in earnest now.

He withdrew his hand, his expression turning hard. I knew he was trying to block out his own emotions. I could see the struggle reflected in his eyes.

Duck tape was placed over my mouth next, sealing off any future cries. My eyes were pleading as he stood up next and used a zip tie to bind my wrists together behind my back. I was defenceless, vulnerable, and exposed. But he wasn’t done. Devan pulled a black mask over my head, covering my entire face. I couldn’t see through the thick black fabric at all. My nose fit through the only hole in the mask, allowing me to breath. I felt claustrophobic. Abject terror gripped me. Devan and Ethen had taken away all but my sense of smell, leaving me isolated in fear and darkness.

I thought I knew what fear was. I thought I knew what pain was. I thought I knew what these men were capable of. But I didn’t. With my senses gone, I started to understand what real terror was. The terror of not knowing, of not seeing or hearing as monsters circled in the dark.

When the pain did come, it was excruciatingly familiar. I fell back on the bed as the taser punched into my stomach, releasing a current of electricity through my whole body. My muscles instantly clenched liked a Charlie-horse. Yet again, the pain was so bad I couldn’t even find the strength to cry out through the duct tape. My jaws clenched, grinding my molars together forcefully.

All I could concentrate on was the feeling of pain in my body. I pulled in shallow quick breaths, the expansion of my lungs and movement of my diaphragm sending forks of radiating red hot shocks through my upper body.

I wasn’t even close to recovering from the first assault when the belt landed across my bare stomach. I flinch, a yelp escaping my throat. If I had been able to hear properly, I knew it would have sounded like a mangled cry. I tried to curl into a fetal position on the bed to escape the lashings, but I couldn’t escape. Whoever was hitting me just kept on going, letting the belt fall against my skin with a crack. It stung harshly each time, the smarting of the leather slapping against flesh.

By the fifteenth hit I was crying out louder with each lashing. My skin was already sore, my muscles already tight and traumatized. I just wanted it to end, I wanted it to stop.

When the last lash finally licked my side, I felt Devan’s fingers wrap around the collar and tug me upright. He had to keep holding me up however, because I was no longer capable of sitting on my own. I was delirious already, the fear and pain a numbing blanket over my mind.

My heart started to pound in my chest as nothing happened for a moment. I visualized Ethen rummaging through the duffle bag. Moaning through the duct tape, I prayed they would stop. I didn’t deserve this. I was already a dog. I was already the sex slave they desired. They didn’t need to do this!

The worst part of the torture was the mental anguish. I knew they wouldn’t stop until they were satisfied, and there was nothing I could say or do to help myself or convince them.

I was being pushed forward off the bed suddenly, Devan yanking my collar down towards the floor. I landed on my knees hard, followed a second later by my head. A pounding throb reverberated through my skull. I was positioned like a man saying his last words to a god that didn’t exist.

Devan’s hand was still holding me down on the floor by the collar when I felt something cold and horribly hard touch my hole. Ethen began thrusting it inside me forcefully. I couldn’t even try to move away it hurt so bad. I screamed through the duct tape, the pain forking up my body and into my stomach, radiating like lighting.

I could feel the coldness of the instrument pushing against my ring of muscles. The torment wasn’t over however, even after the object had been pushed all the way in. I could keenly feel the sides of it growing larger, bigger, as it started to expand inside of me. I let out a scream of as I felt myself ripping open under the pressure of the object. Ethen was doing something, something terrible.

The crippling agony shook my whole body, and I felt hands settle on my hips, holding me up. I couldn’t do this anymore. I couldn’t live through another second.

They held me in position until I was trembling so violently my teeth chattered. Ethen toyed with the instrument, and the expansion subsided as the device closed in on itself. A few moments later it was yanked out of me. My whole ass throbbed intensely, a pounding sensation that didn’t show any signs of letting up.

Devan’s strong arms picked me up forcefully next, plopping me backwards onto the bed. I wanted to die. I just wanted to fucking die. Why couldn’t they just kill me? Why couldn’t this just be over?

I lost all train of thought when the taser hit me again. This time I pissed and defecated myself, and there was not a thing I could do to stop it. My body was under too much stress. Too much pain. Too much fear. I was hostage to my own humiliation.

The smell of waste was pungent in my nostrils as I finally blacked out on the mattress.

\---

I didn’t know it, but they left me alone for two whole days. Time and space seemed to lose all meaning as the black void of mind-numbing anguish and the toxic smell of my own feces and rank stench of stale urine tormented me. I laid on the bed unmoving, praying to any god that could possibly exist to end my suffering. But there was no answer. No reprieve. Only darkness. Only explicit pain and suffering.

They had shut the door and left me to fall apart all on my own. 

I had hoped that Quinten would come help me. I had hoped he would find me and take care of me. But to my despair, he hadn’t. His gentle touch never once caressed my beaten and broken flesh. I somehow felt betrayed and utterly abandoned.

After I had pissed and shit myself again, I thought about how animals defecated right before they died. I thought that maybe some god had answered my prayers. But if it was death, it was too slow. As the hours stretched by, thirst and hunger gnawed at me. I was beyond desperate for sustenance of any kind.

At some point, I had started screaming into my gag. I was beyond broken. I was shattered. I screamed until I couldn’t scream anymore. I was convinced they had abandoned me here to wither and die of dehydration and starvation, covered in my own filth.

When I finally stilled, that chasm of hollowness was bottomless; it was a soul sucking abyss. Everything I once was and might have been had turned to ash. Devan had succeeded. Whatever hope and inner strength I had had was now entirely extinguished. There was nothing left in me to protect. Nothing left to defend. I had no dignity. I had no sense of self. I was an empty husk.

By the time Devan peeled the mask off my face, I was gone.

\---

Vacant eyes stared up into the face of my captor, my master. He bent over me, cutting off my wrist ties and removing the tape and earplugs from my face. My heartbeat was shallow. I had given up the will to live. I felt his fingers press into the side of my neck, searching for a pulse. I was alive, but barely.

He moved slowly as he picked me up off the bed, cradling me in his arms. I was vaguely aware as he took me to the washroom and set me down in the tub. I was covered in dried waste that had caked on to my skin.

Devan didn’t seem phased by what he had done to me, or how I had been forced to soil myself.

Warm water splashed over my flesh, washing away the sweat and excrement. I never flinched, never responded to anything he did. The simple pleasures of warm water and cleansing were beyond me. When he was done, Devan held me up with one arm wrapped around my chest while he tried to dry me off with the other.

He cradled me like a dying child as he took me to the couch, laying me down on the soft cushions. A warm blanket was tucked around me. Even though I could hear again, I couldn’t pick up any sounds. The cabin was quiet, as if Devan was the only one here. Maybe he was.

He lifted my head as he sat down, letting his leg act as a pillow. My eyes were open, but sight meant nothing to me. I knew my face was a portrait of shell-shocked horror. His fingers traced through my short hair.

“You think he will make it?” Quinten whispered. I hadn’t even been aware of his presence. 

“Hard to tell at this point.” Devan said softly.

“I will try and make some soup for him. He needs to eat.” Ethen said, his voice sounded pained. I found the concept of death comforting. If only I could close my eyes and never again feel the need to open them.

\---

Warmth. Warmth pressed against my lips as Ethen tried to put soup in my mouth. I didn’t respond and the liquid trickled down the side of my cheek. I wanted to die. If dying meant starving to death, then so be it. The gut twisting ache of hunger was a muted roar against the fog of despair I drowned in.

“Open his mouth Devan.”

Fingers pried at my lax jaw and my lips parted without much effort. I didn’t want food. Why couldn’t they understand that?

Ethen poured a spoonful of broth into my mouth. I tasted chicken on my tongue as Devan closed my jaw, he pinched my nose, forcing me to swallow. I was a limp doll, a figurine to manipulate as desired. The cycle continued until the bowl was empty.

“I don’t think he’s going to make it.” I heard Ethen mutter under his breath. “Maybe you should just take him outside and finish it.”

“Not yet.” Devan said, his voice tight. He sounded like a man being forced to put down his favourite pet. The cabin fell silent again, and I drifted off to sleep.

\---

Devan waited three days before he finally took me outside as Ethen had originally suggested. It was early morning when he scooped my body off the couch, carrying me through the front door. I hung like a limp fish in his arms. My body was terribly thin now. My frame mostly skin pulled loosely over bone. My body was deteriorating quickly from lack of sustenance and willingness to thrive.

He carried me around the cabin and pushed a little way into the bush before setting me down on the ground. The fall leaves crunched under the weight of my body. I was laying on my side, my arms curled, and legs bent at the knee. My head was tilted forward towards my chest, which rose and fell softly.

Devan knelt over me, working the clasp of my collar before removing it completely. He then reached a hand behind him and pulled out a large hunting knife. For the fist time since he had removed my mask, a spark of life glinted in my lifeless eyes. Hope. He was finally going to kill me. It was going to be over.

The man’s large hand wrapped around my forehead, drawing my head back sharply. My neck was completely stretched and exposed. A second later I felt the sharp edge of the blade rest firmly against the side of my artery. He was going to do it. He was going to slit my throat and let me go. A trickle of blood slipped down my neck with the pressure.

“Goddamnit, Bryson. I didn’t want to be forced to do this. I needed to put that fire out. It was too dangerous. But instead, I took everything didn’t I? I took away your will to live.”

He withdrew the knife and pulled my upper body into a tight embrace.

“You know, we enjoyed you. All three of us. In our sick and twisted ways, you were becoming more than just a pet Bryson. You were becoming something we all cared for.”

Why was he telling me this? He never cared about me, none of them did. It was all lies. Just lies. He wanted me back so he could keep his plaything.

“I liked seeing you in the morning, I liked watching you try and please me. I know I am a bad person. I have never been good. I have never been kind. I am selfish and fucked up. I know that.” He rambled, confessing himself to me, as if I didn’t already know this about him. “But you make us happy. I know Quinten secretly adores you. I know Ethen wants to have more of you. I want to have more of you.” He kissed my head softly. “Please don’t make me do this.” He whispered.

I felt something stir in my chest. A longing. It was faint, but it was there. The emotion slowly beginning to take root, penetrating that thick, suffocating fog of despair. 

If I chose to live, I would be spending the rest of my life devoted to Devan. His pet. His fucktoy. His property. Small amounts of pleasure would be derived from pleasing him and getting to stay in Quinten’s arms.

Quinten.

The sinking feeling of betrayal landed in my gut as I thought his name. Why hadn’t he helped me? He had always been the only light in my darkness. The one who would always come and take care of me after Devan and Ethen were done their wicked games. He had not come this time. He had not helped me.

My chest shook suddenly. I just wanted Quinten to hold me again, like he had before. To tell me he would protect me. To tell me I would be okay.

“Bryson?” Devan asked carefully, not sure what to make of my sudden expression of emotion.

As feelings started to filter back into my body, the hollow gaping void I was feeling in my chest started to crack. I slowly tilted my face into Devan’s chest, breathing in his masculine scent through his warm shirt. His strong arm held my frail body up against his chest and I softly started to cry against him.

Devan brought up his free hand and stroked my hair, caressing and petting me. With my weak arm, I gasped his shirt and clung to him.

“Do you want to go back in the house?” His voice was flat, not yet convinced that he wouldn’t still have to kill me.

I didn’t let myself think as I nodded my head against his chest. I knew I would regret this moment for the rest of my miserable existence.

Devan picked up the collar, which lay on the forest floor beside us. The rough leather felt right as he maneuvered it back around my neck and carefully secured the clasp. Without hesitating, he slipped one arm under my knees, the other around my back, cradling me in his arms. The walk back to the house was slow, almost meaningfully so. Devan was being careful, something I hadn’t thought him capable of.

As he mounted the steps to the cabin, Quinten opened the wooden door. I was surprised to see a teary gleam in his eyes, just as he was surprised to see me still alive in Devan’s arms.

“Why?” He asked Devan, his voice confused.

“It’s not over yet.” Was all Devan said as he shouldered through the front door and moved to lay me back on the couch.

In my weakened emotional state, I drifted to sleep as Devan slipped a heavy blanket over my body.


	15. Resurrection

Being shattered wasn’t something I could just pretend didn’t happen. Despite my weak will to endure, I was still incredibly broken. The heavy weight of depression loomed over me, zapping all of my strength. It was a solid week before I was strong enough to even get off the couch and use the washroom on my own.

When the guys needed to go out for work, they had Chris come over and babysit me between shifts. Devan thought I was a suicide risk, and I couldn’t blame him. Every time I thought about the torture, I wanted to die all over again. It made me feel so explicitly horrible inside I felt motivated to carve out my own organs. Now just so happened to be one of those times.

Chris was playing on his phone as I slipped off the couch carefully, placing my feet softly on the hardwood floor. He glanced up, regarding me carefully before turning his attention back to the screen. I walked to the washroom, closing the door behind me. I was haunted; plagued by inner daemons that wouldn’t leave me alone.

After going to the washroom, I moved to the sink to rinse my hands and ended up staring at my reflection, hoping to see someone I knew looking back at me. 

“Hey!” I heard Chris call out from the couch, his voice penetrating through the closed door. “Get out here now.”

My shoulders sagged as I stepped towards the door, cracking it open. How could I keep living and feel this horrible? Physically I was fine, but psychologically I was bruised and bloody. My steps felt heavy and slow as I walked into the hallway.

I was halfway back to the couch when I crumpled to the floor. I just couldn’t take another step. I started sobbing, my cries wracking my body. I didn’t know how to exist in the moment let alone live for the future. Devan and Ethen had done terrible things to me and had robbed me of my future and everything I desired in life.

“Woah, Bryson.” Chris said, tossing his phone on the couch as he got up and strode over to me. “Come here buddy.” He sat on the floor, pulling me into his thick arms. His hand rubbed my back. “It will get better.” He soothed. I turned my face into his armpit and kept crying. I didn’t know how to stop. Did Chris even know what they had done to me? He must have at had a sense of it, at least. He saw my damaged flesh and broken spirit.

“I want to die.” I said between sobs, my sides heaving as I sucked in oxygen. “Kill me please!”

“You know I can’t do that Bryson. Whether you live or die is Devan’s decision, not mine.”

“I can’t go on like this anymore.”

“You can, and you will. Calm down, okay?”

I nodded my head, my face still squished into his shoulder. I leaned back several minutes later and rubbed my cheeks. Despite how weak and pathetic I looked, crying had actually made me feel better. I felt like a small weight had been lifted from my chest.

“You think you could eat now? It is almost time for your dinner anyway.”

I nodded again.

“Okay.”

Chris got up from the floor and walked to the kitchen. I stayed sitting where I was, watching him move around. Devan had taught him the routine a few days ago and now the large man had followed it exactly. He scooped two cups of kibble into my bowl before mixing in some leftover real food from yesterday.

“Here.” He stated, putting it down in the usual spot. I crawled over, leaning my face down into the bowl. I had gotten used to the dry, salty taste of the round balls. Instead of focusing on the taste of the kibbles, I savoured the small chucks of meat and potato that was todays special treat. The room was silent except for the loud crunching of the dog food between my teeth as I broke it into pieces. Chris was leaning back against the counter, absently staring at me. He always got this weird expression of mild disgust when he watched me eat. I wasn’t even sure he was aware of it.

When I finished, I licked my face with my tongue. I was getting better at not making a mess of myself anymore. Chris bent down and retrieved the bowl, tossing it in the sink.

“You know Bryson,” He said, his back still turned to me. “Just between you and me, sometimes I do regret what I did that day.” I knew exactly what he was referring to. He was talking about the day he had shot me. “I didn’t know Devan, Ethen, or Quinten at the time, we weren’t friends yet. Bill had told me the night before that the new guys in town had taken you, but that was it. I had no idea what they intended to do with you.”

He turned around then, leaning back against the kitchen counter while I sat on the floor. What did he want me to say? He had been my only chance at salvation, and he had single handily delivered me back to hell on a silver platter. I remained silent.

“But it is what it is, and you belong to the guy’s now. When I look at you now, I don’t see anything worth saving anymore.”

He walked past me then, heading casually back to the couch as if he hadn’t just shot me all over again. His words hit me in the chest like a bullet straight to the heart. I wasn’t worth saving anymore. I was pathetic. I was a pathetic fucking animal. I was disgusting. I was a kinky sex toy to be used and abused. I wasn’t a young man with a brimming future full of potential. I was a dirty worm sitting on the floor of a dirty house. I already knew that. But having Chris reaffirm my own thoughts was even more devastating. There was no hope that the broken shards of my shattered life could be put back together again. I didn’t only deserve to be here, I needed to be here. I had stopped trying to think of ways I could escape because I was ashamed of what was happening to me. I was ashamed of what people in my life would think of me.

I fell further into the floor, hiding my face in my arms as I laid on my side and started crying again. I was morning my own death. I was morning the life I would never get to live. I was morning the loss of my parents and friends.

“Do you ever stop crying?” Chris said, growing increasingly annoyed with my childlike behavior. “I don’t know how the guys have been able to put up with you.

I ignored him. I needed this. I needed to cry. I needed to let these tears wash away the remains of my soul. When I was too exhausted to carry on anymore, I knew I had just finished crying for the last time. Picking myself up off the floor, I crawled to the couch and slipped under the covers before instantly falling asleep.

\---

The loud thumping of boots thumping up the porch steps woke me up. I must have slept for a few hours if the guys were already home. Chris got off the couch, walking over to the front door and to let them in.

“How was babysitting?” Ethen said, the first to walk through. He was wearing a thick black jacket over a green tee and blue jeans.

“Shitty, he practically cried the whole fucking time before falling asleep. You guys need to pay me more to sit around and listen this.”

“Seriously? He cried the whole time? Did you say something to him?”

“I said a few things.”

“Well it’s probably your fault then.”

“Fuck off man, I was just trying to help.”

“Here, whatever.” Ethen said, pulling out some bills from his wallet. Chris took them and left, not needing to stick around for a moment longer.

Ethen walked over to me as I sat up on the couch and rubbed my head friskily. “Did you eat dinner?”

I nodded.

“Good.”

He left then, walking down the hall to his room. Devan and Quinten entered the house a few minutes later. I slipped off the couch, crawling to Devan as he hung his coat on the rack. I was done feeling sorry for myself. If this was going to be my life, then I was going to live it. My head bumped against the side of his leg, and he looked down at me.

“What do you want?” He asked in an annoyed tone before pushing me away with his foot. The wet sole of his boot hit me in the shoulder and I stumbled back. I shook my head; I didn’t want anything. “I don’t know what that means. Talk.”

“I’m happy you’re home.” I replied sadly, offended he had pushed me away. Maybe I had made a mistake coming to Devan without permission.

“Oh, okay.” He said, surprised. He reached down and petted my head as Ethen had done earlier, before running his palm down my back. His fingers were cold from being outside and my skin trailed goosebumps behind his touch.

“Seems like he’s doing better today.” Quinten observed, slipping his shoes off.

“Maybe Chris said something to him.”

“Maybe.”

Ethen came walking down the hallway then. “Chris said he practically cried the whole day, but he did eat his dinner.”

“I’m sure he loved that.” Quinten remarked sarcastically.

“Yah, he wants us to pay him more.”

Devan gripped my collar and yanked me up so that I sit upright on my knees. I kept my eyes downcast towards the floor despite the fact his face was inches from my own. “You done crying now? I can’t take much more of it.” I nodded truthfully. I was officially done crying. “Good.” He let go of the collar, my hands falling back to the wood planks. I crawled away, back to the couch.

“I guess it’s my turn to make dinner tonight.” Quinten said, moving into the kitchen.

“Great, I want to play with Bryson for a bit.” Ethen said suddenly, and I turned to look at him sharply. It had been a while since any of the guys had been able to use me, so I wasn’t surprised by his intentions. I did think it was odd however, as I had never had sex with Ethen alone before. He only seemed to rape me when Devan was participating as well. I was obedient as he walked up to me and pushed me from the couch onto the floor of the living room.

“I don’t like boring vanilla sex like Quinten. I want you resist. I like the struggle.” Ethen instructed. I didn’t approve. I was always supposed to allow them to do what they wanted. What he wanted was the complete opposite. My eyes flicked to Devan, but he didn’t seem to care. “Hey, I am the one talking to you.” Ethen said, pulling my attention back. “We’re going to wrestle okay? No biting though. You bite me and I will get mean.”

“You mind if I watch?” Devan asked, pulling a beer out of the fridge.

“You know I don’t care.” Ethen replied. Devan walked to the couch and sat down, cracking open the can.

I sat at Ethen’s feet nervously. He kicked me and I moved away, shuffling to the side. I felt extremely uncomfortable, not knowing what to do. Every time I acted in a way that was not completely submissive I got in trouble. Ethen sunk down to the floor across from me, still fully clothed in his jeans and a green tee. He reached out, grabbing my arm. I didn’t react.

“Resist.” He said, frustrated. I complied, attempting to pull my arm back. His grip got stronger, and I brought my other arm up, pushing against his shoulder to pull away. But he just swatted my arm and then crushed me into the floor. “That was weak, real weak. Do I have to hurt you to make you want to do this?”

I shook my head fast. I didn’t want that.

“Then try again.” He backed off, letting me get up onto all fours.

Ethen moved faster this time, lunging at me, and my instincts kicked in. We collided, his upper body wrapping around mine in a tight embrace. I tensed my muscles, twisting on the floor and using my legs to push back. Ethen fell onto his side, still holding me. I growled, pushing my arms up against his stiff hold, trying to break free. It took a solid minute of pure struggle to wriggle loose. When I fell out of his hold, I twisted around and slipped my arm under his armpit, using my body weight to slam him into the floor next as I body tackled his chest. He grunted, and I growled again. I wanted him to stay down. But no such luck. Ethen crushed my arm to his side and used his entire body weight to flip us over. I was now on the bottom and he was on top, our chests facing each other.

I breathed heavily as I tried to wriggle free, squirming beneath him. His thighs were locked onto the sides of my hips in a crushing vise. He then grabbed my wrists and yanked my arms up, my fists pressing into the floor above my head. I was stretched out under him, unable to move. His face was inches from my own when he leaned down and kissed me. His tongue pried my lips apart and I felt him slip inside my mouth. My sides were heaving as I caught my and kissed him at the same time. I was really out of shape.

“Fucking hot.” I heard Devan mutter from the couch, but I couldn’t pay much attention to him. I was too busy with Ethen.

When he drew back from the kiss, I was able to get one of my hands free. I quickly brought my arm back down and slammed my palm into his chest, making him arch backwards. I got my other arm free then as well and grabbed at his forearm, trying to push down and get my hips out of his hold. Ethen wasn’t going to let me go, however. He reefed an arm up and out of my grasp, grabbing my collar and holding fast. His other arm strained against my weight as he twisted his hand and grabbed my wrist. When he had it, he yanked my arm across my body aggressively, making my torso twist to the right. I knew what he was trying to do now. He was trying to get me on my stomach.

I snarled, a vicious sound ripping out of my throat and I bared my teeth at Ethen. He seemed taken off guard by my reaction and his hold loosened just enough. I strained forward and bit his arm, but I had enough sense to do it lightly. 

“Ahh!” Ethen yelled, yanking his arm out of my mouth. I heard Devan laughing, but Ethen was pissed now. “I told you not to fucking bite!” He rammed his elbow into my diaphragm, making me yelp in pain. That hurt. Ethen took advantage of my discomfort, grabbing my wrist again and twisting me around until I was facing the floor. I didn’t like this position; it was too vulnerable. But I could sense that Ethen had had enough wrestling now. He wanted to fuck me. His hand wrapped around my collar again and he leaned forward, pushing my face down against the floor. My hips were still locked between his thighs.

Ethen used his one free hand to open his pants and push them down far enough to get his dick out. I felt him press against me, the vein of his cock pulsing with need against my bare ass cheeks. I growled again, the sound of a threatened dog, egging him on more. He shuffled his hips down so he could get his dick positioned behind me. I tried to wiggle free, but he hooked his legs around mine, holding me fast.

With my head forced against the floor from Ethen’s grip on the collar, and his legs pinning me down, he started pushing into me. I yelped, my muscles tight from our struggle. The dry friction of his penis penetrating my ass made me squeeze my eyes shut and grind my molars. How could he like this? My back ached and I drew my hips up to improve the angle. If I was going to get fucked on the floor of the living room, I could at least try and make it less uncomfortable.

Ethen sunk down to the base, his erection probing deeper inside of me. The hold on my collar fell away, and I pushed up onto all fours. I could keenly feel him as I moved. He had won the wrestling match, and the fight was over. I reverted to submission as he started drawing out slowly and pushing back in, his movements gradually gaining in speed. Before long he was driving himself into me. His thrusts rocked my body forward and he grabbed at my hips for leverage.

We were both sweating by the time he tensed on top of me, releasing his cum deep into my ass. After he’d pulled out, I leaned into the floor, completely exhausted.

“Good job.” Ethen said, rubbing my ass cheeks with his hands before getting up and heading to the washroom.

“Dinner is going to be ready in ten.” Quinten called out.

“Yah, I will be ready.” Ethen replied from the hallway.

“Ten gives me just enough time to get off next.” Devan said, getting up from the couch. I could see the erection tugging at the front of his pants. “I thought I could just sit back and watch, but you put on quite the show. You and Ethen look good rolling on the floor together.”

Devan quickly flipped his belt open and drew down the front of his pants before getting down on the floor with me. I wasn’t ready to go again, but I didn’t exactly have an option. I got back up to my hands and knees, pointing my ass in Devan’s direction. He didn’t waste any time. His large fingers gripped my hips and he started pushing into me. I gritted my teeth again at the intrusion. Devan’s cock was huge, and my hole always struggled to stretch around him.

Suddenly he pulled me back as he thrust forward, sinking down to the hilt rapidly. I squirmed and let out a cry of sharp pain. Devan reached an arm forward over my chest and fingers wrapped around my throat. His other arm secured my waist. This was one of his favourite ways to hold me. The larger man practically engulfed my body. Several more yelps escaped my lips as he viscously worked himself against me.

“One day you will be able to take my cock without a fuss.” He said roughly, his voice short and tight.

“Few more minutes.” Quinten called out, and Devan replied, “Cumming!” with a laugh. I felt him lean in as he shot a full load into me a few moments later.

When Devan pulled out and I felt like my insides had just been ripped out with him. I gripped my abdomen as if that would somehow help ease the strain inside me. My face contorted into a pained expression. “Oops.” Devan said, realizing what he had done as he got up to his feet and shoved his spent cock back into his pants. He reached down and hoisted me to my feet, not caring an iota that I was still uncomfortable. “I want to give you a treat for being good.”

My ass throbbed as I stumbled behind him into the kitchen. Devan opened the cupboard and pulled out a chocolate bar, pushing it into my hand. My mouth watered instantly. I hadn’t had junk food a long time. I eagerly peeled off the wrapper, my hands shaking as I bit off a chunk and tasted caramel and chocolate against my tongue. It was a million times better than I remembered.

I ate the whole bar in seconds.

“You’re supposed to chew it Bryson, not swallow it whole.” Devan laughed, snatching the empty wrapper from my hands and putting it in the garbage. “Go to the bathroom and have a shower while we eat dinner.”

I nodded and waited outside the washroom for Ethen to get out. When he finally did exit, I jumped into the tub.

The warm water hit my face and streamed down my chest as I stood under the spray. I thought about how I had just had sex with Ethen and Devan, although one sided. Unless it was apart of their games, they didn’t care if I derived any pleasure myself. I looked down at my body. Being raped was my new normal, and I suddenly wondered if it could still be considered rape. I didn’t resist anymore. I was resigned to what they used me for, even if it was against my will. Death could have been my escape, but I had chosen to live. I had chosen to keep letting them use me.

I still felt a pang hurt in my chest when I thought of Quinten. He had been distant towards me since my torture. He hadn’t gone out of his way to comfort me or tend to me like he had in the past. Despite this however, my cock throbbed at the thought of him using me.

I banged my fist on the shower wall. Fuck. I was so fucked in the head.

Grabbing the shampoo, I lathered my short hair ferociously. I was lusting for Quinten. I wanted him to come in here and use me like Devan did so often did. My cock throbbed and I tried to ignore it.

Rinsing my hair, I closed my eyes and breathed deeply but the fantasies didn’t relent. I wanted to stare deep into his green eyes and run my hands over his toned muscles. I wanted him to dominate me in only ways that he could.

Frustrated, I was sporting an erection as I grabbed the soap and lathered my body. The bar slipped between my ass cheeks to clean out the remains of Devan and Ethen. But I secretly wished the cum rinsing down the drain had been Quinten’s.

Turning off the taps, I grabbed a towel off the rack and stepped out of the shower. The fabric frisked against my thin frame.

When I was dried off, I looked down at my raging erection. I was going to have to jack off right now, cause I sure as shit wasn’t about to walk out there looking like this.

I just so happened to be in the middle of jerking off when Devan opened the bathroom door.

“Fuck kid, what’s taking you so long?” He said before his gaze settled on me standing in the middle of the bathroom with my hand wrapped around my dick. He laughed, “Who are you thinking about?”

“Quinten.” I muttered, a flame of red-hot heat lighting up my face.

“Hey Quinten!” Devan called, “You get in here and deal with Bryson. He wants you to fuck him.”

I groaned with embarrassment. 

“You serious? I am not even done eating yet.” I heard him reply from the kitchen table.

“You gunna make poor Bryson wait or what? Poor kid’s got blue balls. Eat later.”

“You’re a bastard.”

“You know it.”

Devan saunter away as Quinten walked into the bathroom. I felt like I was going to melt into a puddle on the floor as he looked at me. I grabbed the towel to cover myself, but he just walked in and threw it away.

“You want me to fuck you?” Quinten whispered into my ear, his breath tingling my skin.

“Yes.” I mumbled all too quickly.

“How much?”

“A lot.” I said, as if he couldn’t see how hard I already was for him. He brought his hands up to my waist and let his fingers trail up to my ribs. I couldn’t take it any longer. I kissed him hard. I didn’t care if he punished me, I wanted him. He was the only thing in my life I actually wanted. He let me kiss him, his mouth parting under the pressure of my lips. He was gorgeous. He was perfect. My hands worked the bottom of his shirt as I tugged it up and off his body.

“Slow down Bryson.” He chuckled, his shirt now laying on the floor. I didn’t want to slow down, but I did. “Let’s go to my room.” He said, leading me out of the bathroom. I heard Devan and Ethen cat calling from the kitchen table as we crossed the hallway.

Once we were in his room, Quinten started taking control. He pushed me backwards onto the bed, crawling on top of me slowly. I leaned back into the mattress, the soft bed giving away under the weight of our bodies. His lips landed on my belly button before slowly travelling up to my mouth. He tasted amazing as his tongue delved into my mouth. I breathed deeply, letting his husky scent fill my lungs.

My hands worked the front of his jeans as we kissed, releasing them from his hips. His muscular body hovered just above mine and I couldn’t resist the urge to pull him closer to me.

“Slow down Bryson.” He murmured again into my ear. It was torture as he made me wait.

He fell to the side of me and finished shrugging off his pants before doing the same with his underwear. His cock was semi erect as he moved over me again. My own cock was so hard it was getting uncomfortable. I needed release badly.

“I’m glad you want me.” He said softly.

“I’ve always wanted you.” I said without thinking. Quinten did things to me I couldn’t explain.

We both fell silent as Quinten’s lips found a new place to kiss. I gasped, arching my lower back off the bed as he brought himself down my erection. His lips teased my tip, and I could barely contain a moan of pleasure. My muscles tensed as he took me in his mouth. I was barely holding on.

When he took me all the way down, I was done in seconds. I came in his mouth and he swallowed without any qualms. I was somewhat ashamed I hadn’t lasted longer, but I couldn’t have held out a second more.

I thought Quinten was going to turn me over when he grabbed my hips, but to my surprise he positioned himself to enter as we faced each other. I lifted my ass off the bed for him and pushed my head back into the bedding as he took me. I was bruised from Devan, but that didn’t stop the pleasure from breaking through the throb. My legs wrapped around his hips as he sunk down to the hilt.

As he thrusted, his movements were sensual and slow. He knew I would be bruised, even without me complaining. I looked into his eyes, savoring those green irises that returned my stare. I felt like he could see right through me.

After he was done, Quinten pulled out slowly. His hands trailed down my thin waist. His body hit the bed beside me a second later as he fell back on the mattress. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders as I cuddled against him, making me feel safe and secure.

“What changed today?” He asked softly.

I was quiet for a few minutes, thinking about what he had asked. “I know now that I belong here with you guys.” I said, a touch of sadness laced into my soft voice. Quinten’s finger trailed the skin on my shoulder, and I felt his lips kiss the side of my face gently.

“You can sleep in my bed from now on if you want.” Quinten said, and I felt like my chest was going to burst. “I’d like that.” I said, trying to keep the excitement from my voice.

Quinten rolled away from me then, getting off the bed. “You can stay here if you want, I am going to finish eating now.” He threw me a grin as he walked out the door.

I felt warm and comfortable as I drifted off to sleep, my eyes closing as his footsteps receded down the hallway.


	16. New Existence

**-5 weeks later-**

“We need to talk about the hit.” Devan’s serious tone hushed the cabin as Quinten and Ethen fell silent at the table. I couldn’t see their faces from my position on the floor next to Devan’s chair. I laid curled on my side like a dog resting next to its master. My ears literally “perked” at the mention of the word “hit”. I had not heard anyone talk about it in such a long time I’d forgotten about the deal Devan had made with Chris and the gang. A nervous spike of anxiety filled my chest at the thought of these men killing someone.

I heard a coffee mug land lightly on the table. Someone leaned back in their chair.

“I suppose we better talk about it.” Quinten remarked.

“Like I said before, I want to help.” Ethen’s interest was unmasked. I saw the heel of his foot jump up and down in excitement from under the table. 

“Chris said I could do the job anyway I wanted. I don’t think Bill would have any qualms with you guys helping me out. I want you, Ethen, in on it especially since it will help build trust with the gang.”

“Do you think Bill will give me a promotion from just doing deliveries?”

“No. Not yet, even with the junkie taken care of. You just haven’t been around long enough. Maybe in the spring you could bring it up.” All three of the guys had been doing mostly drug deliveries for Bill and Chris part time for cash.

Ethen blew out a sigh of impatience.

“What are you thinking?” Quinten asked, urging Devan to get to the point.

“It’s almost the end of October and a good dump of snow is forecasted next weekend, which is Halloween by the way. If we leave this much later, we could run into troubles with road conditions getting up to the northern lakes. I think it makes the most sense to dump the body in one of those remote lakes just before freeze-up. It’s short notice, but I’m thinking we get this done right away.”

There was a moment of silence as everyone considered what Devan was saying.

“What do you mean right away?” Quinten inquired with hesitancy.

“In two days.”

“Sunday? that’s ridiculous.” Quinten rebuffed, “we haven’t spent any time working out the details yet.”

“The plan is pretty simple actually. No need to overly complicate it. The prep work on my end won’t take very long, I already know what supplies I need to get. I’d call Chris and get him to give Quinten and Tanner a short shift together Sunday afternoon. Quinten, you’d offer to pick Tanner up at his place in South Side because its on the way to the garage. Instead of dropping him off at his place later, you’d will bring him back here. Once the both of you arrive, I’ll secure him, and we’ll head straight up to Flounder’s Lake. It’s a two-hour drive north give or take. Chris will be able to work us up an alibi.”

“In theory it could work with some improvising. I probably won’t know the shift details until the day-of.” Quinten said.

“If we have to delay, then so be it. But for now, I think we should go with it and try to get this done Sunday.”

“Fine. I’m cool with that.” Quinten said, giving his tentative approval.

“Ethen?” Devan asked.

“What is my role in this?”

“You can help me secure Tanner if needed when Quinten and him arrive. I will also need your help once we’re up at the lake dealing with the body. Don’t worry, you’ll have an opportunity to do things.”

“Then I am good with it.”

“Great.”

I was quiet as I listened to the conversation. The junkie had a name now: Tanner. I was uncomfortable with my captors talking about murder so easily. Even though I held a grudge against Tanner for the horrible things that Devan and Ethen had done to me, I didn’t think he deserved to be killed. I also couldn’t help but feel that one day it would be me they’d be planning be planning on murdering. It was unnerving.

I put my head down on the floor and focused on the bits of dirt and grime in front of my face. Devan’s chair creaked as he leaned over and ran his hand down my waist. Since assuming my role completely a month ago, the passing of each day had held little meaning. I woke up every morning learning to cope with whatever these men had planned for me.

Devan’s chair slid out suddenly, the legs scraping against the floor. I pushed myself into a lazy sitting position, waiting to see if he would want anything from me. Devan looked down at me and smiled. “I almost forgot I ordered something for you online Bryson. A surprise.” He said, completely changing the subject.

I cocked my head in confusion, what could this be? Now that I had succumbed to my role and what was expected of me, I was a lot less of a challenge for Devan and Ethen. I was broken and they didn’t have as many reasons to hurt me physically. On the upside, my body had healed from most of its grievances as a result of fewer punishments. On the downside, Devan had gotten more creative at finding other ways to torment me.

Devan stood up and went to the counter, picking up a parcel and bringing it back to the table.

“Is that what you were talking about last week?” Ethen asked, his tone dripping with curiosity.

“You bet.”

The shipping box had already been cut open, so Devan opened the flaps and pulled out a smaller box. He opened it and took out a metal contraption. It was an odd shape, and I had never seen anything like it before.

“Do you know what this is?” He asked, showing it to me. I shook my head, nervous angst building in my gut. Ethen was grinning and Quinten rolled his eyes. I shifted my gaze back to Devan. “Stand up.” He ordered, and I obeyed, getting to my feet in front of him. Devan reached out and cupped my balls and cock in his large hand. I didn’t flinch as he touched me.

“This,” He said, holding up the stainless steal contraption in the open palm of his free hand, “is a cage. You are going to wear this whenever I want you to, such as now.” I nodded my head, even though it didn’t matter whether or not I approved.

Devan opened the device and positioned it snuggly over my parts and wrapped the strap around my hips before locking it closed. He left the key on the tabletop. The metal of the cage was cool against my unaroused dick, the feeling foreign and odd. The weight of the device pulled at my skin, but it was not terribly uncomfortable.

“You can still go piss with that on, you’ll just have to get used to it. Go show Ethen and Quinten.”

I moved around Devan’s chair to stand in front of Ethen. He reached out and held my caged junk in his hands. “Looks good.” Ethen said, still holding me. “Do you know why guys where these cages Bryson?” I shook my head. Why would anyone want to wear one? It seemed so ridiculous. “They can be used as a form of celibacy. You can’t get hard wearing one…” Ethen said while massaging the base of my balls, “…well, at least I wouldn’t recommend it.” That sly, sadistic smile crept over his face. It didn’t take much imagination to realize I’d be in a world of hurt if I got aroused while wearing the device. It didn’t exactly leave room for growth.

Ethen let go of me and I walked around the table to show Quinten. He nodded in approval, “It looks alright.” A light flush heated my skin at his acknowledgement, and I turned away quickly, taking my place again on the floor beside Devan. When the men started talking about something else, I finally looked down and examined it for myself.

\------

“Quinten and I have to go out and do a delivery for Bill, we’ll be back in a few hours. It’s just a short shift today.” Devan said as everyone rose from the table. “Sure, I’ll just stay around the cabin with Bryson.” That sadistic look in Ethen’s eyes returned as his gaze sought me out. I knew I would be letting Ethen fuck me the moment they left.

I crawled across the kitchen floor and towards the living room, where I scrambled onto the couch and pulled a blanket across my body. A few moments of comfort were all I would have as Devan and Quinten put their shoes and coats on. When Devan opened the front door, I could see it was grey and raining outside. Typical fall weather in Canada.

My eyes traced the lines in the wall until I heard the front door close and Ethen stepped into my line of sight. He peeled off his shirt before reaching forward to take my blanket away. I shifted onto my back as he positioned himself on top of me, his legs straddling me on the couch. I brought my hands up, bracing them against his bare chest. I knew he liked this. He always liked a bit of resistance. Ethen grabbed my wrists easily and stretched my arms out above my head as he leaned forward and kissed me. His lips were soft against my own, a deception I would not fall for. As he kissed me, I closed my eyes and kissed him back, letting him explore my mouth as his tongue pushed into me.

After making out with Ethen for several minutes, my cock began to throb as my body reacted to the sexual stimuli. I shifted under Ethen’s hips, feeling uncomfortable as I suddenly became all too aware of the cage confining me. My eyes opened and I looked up into Ethen’s face as he broke our kiss. He smiled, amused at my discomfort. His own cock was starting to turn hard, and he ground his hips into my stomach. Ethen was still wearing his jeans, but nonetheless I could feel him growing.

I shifted again, anxiety starting to build in my chest as he continued to grind his hips into me. The cage was all I could concentrate on as my cock started to strain again the device. I whined, the sound of a trapped dog looking for help. This turned Ethen on some more and he let go of my wrists as he leaned back to undo the fly of his pants. I left my arms above my head, waiting.

Ethen shuffled his pants and underwear down as he moved up my body until he was sitting on my chest. I had a hard time breathing as his weight held me down. He thrust his hips forward, pushing his dick down and smacking me in the face with it. I felt the wetness of his pre-cum streak my cheek. “Open up puppy.” He chided, thrusting his hips forward again. I strained my head back, pushing down into the couch. Between Ethen sitting on my chest and my cock bulging against the cage, I felt scared and claustrophobic. I brought my arms back down quickly and tried to push against his thighs to wiggle free. He laughed at the sight of my desperation. “I love it when you look like that.” He remarked, roughly grabbing my wrists and pushing them down so that his knees trapped my hands. My eyed widened in panic.

His cock visibly jumped at the sight of my naked fear. He took that moment to jerk his hips forward again, pushing his dick against my teeth. I opened my mouth regretfully and took him in. His cock pumped against the back of my throat as tears leaked from my eyes. My wrists were burning under the weight of his knees. Ethen squeezed my ribs forcefully with his thighs to keep his own balance and pace. My own cock painfully throbbed against the metal bars of its prison.

I choked as spit built up in the back of my throat and I couldn’t breathe. Ethen didn’t seem to notice, still thrusting his cock down my throat. I let out a muffled cry for help with the last of my air and then Ethen pushed forward until he was so far down my throat my face was pressed into his flesh. I felt myself blacking out as he stiffened and shot hot streams of cum down the back of my throat. The second he pulled out I was trying to cough, but I couldn’t get any air in or out. I was already growing tired from the struggle and convulsed as I felt my eyes closing.

“Hey! Hey!” Ethen exclaimed, finally realizing something was wrong. He jumped off my chest and rolled me from the couch to the floor. I tried crawling away, as if somehow that would help me breathe. He came up behind me and held me, smacking me roughly on the back several times.

“Come on buddy, keep coughing” Ethen encouraged. I did cough, finally able to suck in some air as the spit and cum cleared my airway. When I had regained some of my composure, I sat back on the floor, resting my back against the couch.

“Here, I will get you some water.” Ethen stated, feeling a pang of guilt. I reached out a shaky hand to take the cup he offered to me and brought it to my lips. My mouth tasted bitter and my throat burned from the coughing. The cold water felt nice as I sloshed it around my mouth before swallowing.

Ethen took the cup and placed it on the kitchen counter before coming back to sit on the couch. He regarded me curiously and to my surprised asked, “So what did you think of the conversation this morning?” I didn’t know why Ethen would ask me such a thing, as I was not allowed an opinion. I shook my head and looked to the floor. He took my weak response as an answer. “You should be happy, that fucking junkie has given you a hard time.” I nodded, but that was all.

Ethen sighed and flipped his hand at me when he realized I was not going to engage in the topic. His frustration turned into something else when he gestured for me to come over. I crawled slowly back towards the couch he had just finished face fucking me on. Ethen stood up and discarded his pants and underwear completely and sat back down, legs apart. “Lick me now.”

I obeyed by kneeling in front of him and caressing his limp dick with my tongue. Ethen sat back and closed his eyes as I massaged him.

I knew he was going to be ready to go again when his cock started responding to my stimulus ten minutes later. I sucked Ethen’s balls into my mouth and explored them as he let out a moan. Releasing his balls, I used the flat of my tongue to stroke his shaft from base to tip until it hardened.

“Damn, you’ve been getting much better at sucking cock Bryson.” He said, pushing me away suddenly and jumping to his feet. Ethen quickly sauntered to the kitchen table and retrieved the small key that Devan had left behind. “For being so good I will let you out this round.” I nodded readily. Ethen bent down and worked the lock on the leather strap. When the cage fell away, I sighed in relief, handling myself loosely.

Ethen put the key and cage down on the couch and then turned back to me. “Resist.” Was all he said, and all I needed. We had played this game many times now.

I fought back as he grappled my arms and legs, always managing to find a way to trap my body beneath him. Our straining bodies broke out in sweat as our wrestling continued. I had been slowly getting better at it, learning Ethen’s moves. Each time we played I could last a little bit longer. But at the end of the day, I was still the omega. I was the one getting fucked on the floor.

After Ethen had won our match, he spit on my hole and pushed the head of his cock into me as I closed my eyes and exhaled the breath I had been holding. I focused on relaxing my muscles as Ethen pushed in, making the intrusion slightly more bearable. Quinten had been teaching me how to enjoy anal and the lessons did help. For whatever reason though, it only seemed to feel pleasurable when Quinten was the one fucking me.

As Ethen pumped, he reached forward and grabbed my hard dick, running his thumb over my tip and tightening his grip. I arched my back and yelped, and he laughed in response. I had to yelp again before he decided to let me go. I caressed my strangled member and brought it back to life as Ethen refocused on fucking my ass. Our bodies smacked together as he worked up a fast-pace rhythm.

I grunted and let out a moan as he built up speed. The discomfort and pain seemed to always be present with Devan and Ethen, but sometimes, when I was lucky, it would feel good for a few moments. “You like that Bryson? Do you like how I fuck your ass?” Ethen taunted, I knew what he wanted to hear. “Yes, Sir!”

“Anything else?”

“Please fuck me hard Sir, I love it when you fuck my ass.” I said desperately, the lies sounding genuine simply because I wanted him to finish faster. I’d say whatever I needed to in order to facilitate that happening.

“I am fucking your ass. What else do you want puppy?”

“Can I have your cum please?!”

“Where do you want my cum fuck toy?”

“In my ass, PLEASE?!” I said the last words with emphasis as the pain reached a climax.

He gave me what I wanted, or what he wanted, and came in my ass a few moments later. I let go of my own cock, unable to cum. Ethen didn’t care and went straight to the washroom to clean up after pulling out.

I was just glad it was over.


	17. Movie Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads-up, I have about 4 more chapters to post and then I'll be switching to posting once a week. I want to have 2-3 chapters in reserve at any given time so that you can getting updates regularly as I write.

Ethen was putting the cage back on when I heard the SUV role up to the cabin. I tilted my head towards the door and Ethen noticed my shift in attention. “I guess they’re back already.” He observed, locking the device as he spoke. Ethen walked back towards the kitchen and placed the key on the table where Devan had originally left it.

I crawled to the front door and waited as Devan’s loud voice and heavy foot falls approached from the other side. As the front door swung open, I looked up and nudged his leg with my head. Devan reached down and ran his hand through my short hair in acknowledgment. I scuttled out of the way as he bent down to undo his shoes. Quinten came through the door next, closing it as he crossed the threshold.

As the two men took their gear off, wayward drops of cold water hit my skin. I didn’t greet Quinten the same way I greeted Devan. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to, but rather that I felt Quinten didn’t desire the same interactions that I had with the two other men.

Moving off, I crawled back to the living room and laid down on the floor, my legs bent and curled up next to my torso. This position was the most comfortable on the hardwood floor. I watched silently as Devan walked down the hall towards his bedroom. When he returned, he was holding a large black duffle bag. I instantly felt cold dread hit my stomach and my heart rate sped up in my chest. I knew explicitly well the horrors that bag contained. I pushed my face down into the crook of my arm and closed my eyes. I heard Devan set the bag on the kitchen table and the draw open the zipper.

“You’re setting up now?” Ethen asked, leaning back against the counter.

“Yes. I want to make sure we have everything. Might take a trip into town tomorrow if we need any extra supplies.”

“If your going into town let me know, I want to come.” Ethen replied.

“What do you need in town?”

“Nothing much, but I don’t have any winter gear yet. If it’s going to start snowing, I need to pick up a pair of boots, gloves, and maybe a toque. I already have a jacket.”

“We could all use some winter clothes.” Quinten interjected. Devan was pulling items out of the bag and placing them on the tabletop. The gentle thud of each article brought back vivid, painful memories.

“Maybe we should all do a trip into town, including Bryson” Quinten said suddenly. I lifted my head in genuine surprise. Had he just suggested what I think he had?

“I don’t know. Why? Bryson doesn’t need anything. Practically an indoor dog.” Devan let out a harsh bark of laughter at his own lame-ass joke.

“Bryson might not leave often, but if we need to take him somewhere, he still doesn’t have any clothes.” Quinten further pressed.

“You really think he’s ready to come with us?” Ethen ask, his voice questioning.

“I agree with Quinten. I think we’re at a point with Bryson where we can take him with us. It wouldn’t be a bad idea to get him some clothes. Let’s all go to town first thing Sunday morning before Quinten’s shift with Tanner.” Devan stated, solidifying the plans for everyone.

I had my mouth slightly agape as they talked. I’d be going to town with them on Sunday? The possibility of them wanting to take me out in public had never once crossed my mind. It made me feel unsettled in more ways than one. I was a shadow of who I once was, and what little remained didn’t want to be seen. I was embarrassed at the thought of people seeing what I looked like now. The opportunity for escape was also uncomforting, namely because the choice to run or not to run would kill me; figuratively or literally, I wasn’t quite sure. Evidently Quinten and Devan both thought I’d choose not to escape. Were they right?

Silence filled the cabin as Devan picked up the supplies he wanted and walked to the front door, quickly bending to slip his shoes on before opening the door and running down the deck through the rain. It didn’t take him long put the items in the back of the SUV and sprint back up to the Cabin. The door slammed shut behind him as he took off his shoes, talked over to the table and retrieved the duffel bag before sauntering down the hall to his room.

I felt better knowing the bag was going to be put away.

When Devan came back, he sat on the couch and motioned for me to join him. I got up onto my hands and knees and crossed the floor to the couch. I climbed up onto the cushions and leaned against Devan as I sat beside him. His thick arm drew around my waist as he held me close. His other arm traced the curves of my chest.

“In the meantime, what should we do tonight?” Devan tossed out the question for Ethen and Quinten. It was Ethen who replied. “Why not invite Chris over for a movie? He has a laptop with some burned movies on it.”

“Quinten?”

“I wouldn’t mind a movie.”

Devan withdrew his touch from my chest and reached into his back pocket, fishing for his phone. I watched wordlessly as he secretly punched in his passcode and scrolled through his contacts. When he found Chris’s name, he punched dial. After a few rings Chris answered the call.

“Hey, It’s Devan.”

“Hey man, what’s up?”

“We were wondering if you wanted to bring your laptop over for a movie. It’s pissing rain and we’re bored as shit.”

“Sure, I can be over in a bit.”

“Awesome, see you soon.”

Devan set his phone down on the cushion beside him. “Chris says that he will be over in a bit. I guess we should make dinner before he gets here.”

“It’s your turn Devan.”

“Fuck, really?” Devan gave me a playful slap on the chest before peeling himself off the couch. “I’ll make sausages and potatoes.”

_Classic meat and potatoes… just like my dad used to make._

A pang of deep-seated longing and sadness slammed into my heart as I thought about my dad. He was a man of strong character. I couldn’t imagine the grief he’d been going through right now. I’d seen him cry maybe once in my life, and that was when my grandma had died. It broke my heart imagining him crying for my loss. The loss of his only child. His son.

Both my parents were deeply religious, and I knew their faith in god would be helping them cope right now. They’d be praying that I’d somehow get returned to them. I knew better. There was no god, at least not in my forsaken corner of the earth. And if I ever did get rescued, it would be Satan answering their prayers, not god. _Here’s what you’ve been praying for! Have fun. I’m finished with him now…_

I wondered how long their faith would hold out. The lack of knowing would eventually eat at their resolve. As the days continued to go by, they’d be forced to acknowledge their worst fears. The fear that they’d never see their son again. It was the not knowing how or why that would slowly destroy them.

I attempted to turn my thoughts elsewhere but failed. Dwelling on anything other than my role as Devan’s devoted mutt was dangerous. However, it wasn’t always possible.

_Bad dogs get punished._

I wished I had something to do in moments like these. I was finding myself grappling with boredom frequently of late, which didn’t bode well for trying not to let my mind wander to dark places. I remained sitting on the couch as Devan moved around the kitchen. He pulled out a frying pan and placed it on the stove before fishing a pot from the cupboard and filling it with water. He placed it on the element and turned on the burner. The stove made a ticking noise as it slowly came to life.

Suddenly frustrated with my feelings, I pushed off the couch and crawled to the front door. I knew it was raining outside, but I wanted to get out of the cabin. I pawed at the door, wanting someone to notice me. It took effort to resist just standing up and throwing the door open.

I heard a chair creak as Quinten leaned over the table to see what I was doing. I looked at him and pawed the door again.

“It’s raining Bryson.”

 _No shit._ I thought, pawing the door again. _Let me the fuck out!_

“Seriously?”

“Just go then.” Devan said, tossing potato chunks into the pot of water.

I lifted my arm up and twisted the handle, opening the front door with Devan’s approval. It was already growing dark outside, the light quickly fading as the days grew shorter and winter closed in.

As I shuffled out the door, the cold air made me instantly shiver. I slipped the door closed behind me and leaned back against the side of the cabin. My naked body was quickly draped in goosebumps as I sat with my arms folded over my knees. I looked out over the porch and watched the rain hit the driveway. The sound was memorizing, and I felt the tension leave my body as my emotion faded into an eerie, detached fog of depression. The cold clutches of the crisp air and the chattering of my teeth gave me something to concentrate on as I fought to keep my thoughts only in the present. Thinking about the past or future would get me killed.

I sat in solitude, letting time slip away until a beam of light broke the darkness. A dark coloured four-door sedan crawled up the driveway. I slowly unraveled my stiff, cold limbs as Chris got out of his car and slammed the door shut. He mounted the stairs with long strides. He didn’t notice me until he reached forward to open the front door. I acknowledged him with a small smile that didn’t reach my eyes. The door opened further, and he let me crawl through first before coming in behind.

The smell of cooked food and the feeling of warmth biting into my chilled skin broke my morose state of mind. I suddenly felt starving and I scanned the floor for my bowl, hoping Devan had remembered about my dinner. He had, and I wasted no time crossing the floor to the bowl. The scraps of sausage and potato mixed in with my kibbles had gone cold, but that didn’t bother me. I carefully brought the food into my mouth. As I ate, and the men talked.

“Why was Bryson outside? It’s freezing.” Chris asked as he sat down on the couch, placing his laptop on the coffee table.

“He wanted to be out there, wasn’t my doing.” Devan said, his tone letting Chris know his concern didn’t matter either way.

“Huh.”

“What movies do you have?” Ethen chimed in, also sitting on the same couch as Chris and Quinten.

“Nothing new, but I have Taken, Mission Impossible, Gladiator, Star Wars, and let’s see… Dark Knight.”

“At least you’re not into dramas, I’d be tempted to shoot you.” Devan chuckled.

“I’d be into watching Gladiator or the Dark Knight.” Quinten stated.

“I don’t care which once we watch.” Ethen added.

“Devan?” Chris prompted.

“Gladiator is more up my ally.”

“Gladiator it is then.” Chris replied, opening the movie and pressing play.

The cabin filled with sound as the movie started. I headed to the couch to sit with Devan when I finished eating, leaving my bowl empty on the floor.

I leaned into Devan’s body as I got comfortable, my attention turning to the movie. Devan wrapped his arm behind my back, his hand settling on my hip.

Twenty minutes into the movie Chris got off the couch and walked to his coat, which was hung up by the door. I was vaguely aware of him as I watched the computer screen. When he came back and sat down, he put some items on the coffee table.

“You guys want some?” He asked.

“Yah man.” Ethen said with enthusiasm as he turned his attention the movie to the drugs on the coffee table.

“Devan? Quinten?”

“I’ll take some Ecstasy.” Quinten said casually, still watching the movie. Chris passed him a pill.

“I don’t want anything.” Devan said, surprising me. He wasn’t into the drugs? I shifted my head to look up at his face, but he just held a passive expression.

As the three guys on the couch indulged, the room fell silent again except for the movie. It was obvious why Devan liked it. His gaze was intense and focused as he watched the macho fight scenes.

When the movie finished, Chris was passed out on the couch and Ethen and Quinten turned on another movie. As Mission Impossible started playing next, Devan got up and tugged me off the couch with him. I walked in front of him down the hallway as he guided me by the collar. Pushing the door open and flicking on the light revealed the bare room. I didn’t spend much time in here anymore, as I usually slept with Quinten now. The only time my bed was used was when Devan or Ethen wanted me here for their pleasure.

“Wait on the bed.” Devan ordered and left me alone in the room. I walked over, sitting on the edge of the mattress. The room was cold, and goosebumps rose on my skin as I sat patiently.

When Devan returned, he was naked, but held a concealed object behind his back. He closed the door and walked over to me, pushing me roughly backwards so that I fell backwards onto the mattress. He climbed on top of me and clamped a hand firmly over my mouth. I left my hands at my sides, my heart fluttering in fear. Devan had a dangerous glint in his eyes. He was lusting for something that spoke of my suffering. I didn’t move as he brought his hand forward and revealed a switch blade. With a push of a button the blade sprung open and clicked into place.

I squirmed, my fingers clutching the white sheets of the bed while I moved my head back and forth, trying to dislodge Devan’s hand. He didn’t budge however, clamping my cheeks with his fingers and forcing me to look at him.

“I want this Bryson. Three lines. That’s all. You fight me and I’ll make you take five.” He softened his grip on my face, letting me speak. “Please…” I started to say before he clamped my mouth shut again. “Hey! What did I say?” His voice was as hard and threatening as his gaze. After a moment, he softened his grip on my mouth again so that I could reply. “Ye…yes.” I stumbled shakily.

He clamped his hand flat across my mouth as he brought the sharp edge of the blade to the skin under my collar bone. I keenly felt the first sting as Devan poked the tip of the blade to my flesh. He watched my eyes intently as he dragged the blade slowly across my chest in a near perfect line. Although the cut was not deep, the slow burning sting made my eyes water. In my own defense, I didn’t make a sound as he finished the first line. I breathed heavier through my nose as he placed the blade against my skin again, starting the second line. Halfway through I couldn’t hold back anymore. I let out a pained moan into his hand and tears slipped from the corners of my eyes. My hand involuntarily came up to grab Devan’s arm, the one that was holding my mouth, and he blurted harshly, “don’t touch me.”

My arm fell back onto the bed as he started the third line. I squealed into his hand and shifted my shoulders, the skin more tender as he drew the line lower on my chest. “Don’t fucking move!” The anger in his voice stilled my body but not my cries. As punishment, I swear he dragged the knife even slower. When the last line was finished, he collapsed the blade and let it fall to the floor. His palm lifted from my face and I looked down at my chest. The three lines were welted with thin streaks of blood. I whined, the hot burn the blade had left in its wake was terrible.

“Good boy.” Devan coddled, his voice less harsh and more forgiving now that the deed was done. His cock was throbbing as he backed off the bed and flipped me over onto my stomach. I was glad he wouldn’t be able to watch me cry as I shoved my face into the sheets. The cuts left small streaks of blood as Devan fucked me over the edge of the bed. Each time his thrusts rocked me forward I felt the skin on my chest pinch. The only good thing about being in pain was my lack of arousal. My cock hung limp in its cage, one torment I didn’t have to worry about this time.

When Devan was finished, he pulled out and hulled me up by my collar. I choked as my neck strained and quickly found my footing so that he would let go. The sheets and my skin were smudged with blood and Devan smiled, admiring his handy work. “You look good like that puppy.” He said, bending down to retrieve the fallen knife before walking out of my room and shutting the door.

I wiped the tears from my face as I stood up, crossed the room, and turned out the light.


	18. Mistakes

I woke up laying on my stomach, a thin blanket pulled over my body. Despite sleeping in, I still felt tired as I opened my eyes and rolled over. It had taken me hours to fall asleep with the burning knife marks on my chest. In the end, laying on my stomach and pressing the cuts into the bed had been more forgiving than the fibers of the blanket sliding across my skin. Lucky for me, the cuts didn’t hurt anymore. The burning sting was gone, and I looked down to inspect them. Each line was red with minor swelling. In the deeper parts of the cut, blood clots had formed scabs.

_Looks like I got attacked by an evil cat._

Getting out of bed I walked across the room and opened the door. The cabin was silent as I slowly walked down the hallway towards the living room. Peaking around the wall, I noticed the three guys were passed out on the couch. Devan didn’t seem to be up yet either.

Turning back, I decided to take a shower alone, while I had the chance.

I slipped into the bathroom and closed the door softly. When the water started to turn warm, I went in. I was worried the impact of the spray hitting my chest would make my skin sting again, but it didn’t bother me much.

When I was done in the shower, I turned off the tap and frisked my body with an old green towel that was hanging within reach. Placing it back on the rack, I turned to the sink and brushed my teeth.

I finished up, putting my toothbrush back in the holder and left the bathroom. I walked to the couch and pointedly decided not to crawl. I didn’t think anyone would see me.

I noticed then that the coffee pot was grumbling in the kitchen, indicating that Devan must have gotten up to turn it on. A few minutes later he appeared from his room, walking down the hallway towards the kitchen. He looked pissed when he saw that the three guys were still sleeping on the couch.

“Bryson go give Ethen a good bite on the leg. That’ll wake him up.”

I looked at him sharply, was he joking?

“Do it.” He prodded, leaning back against the counter, a sly smile played on his face.

I got off the couch and crawled towards the guys. I clamped down on Ethen’s leg, biting down on his flesh through his old jeans. I felt him jerk awake from his stupor, ripping his leg out of my teeth.

“What the fuck?!” He yelled, punting me in the head with his foot. I fell backwards and crawled away before he could get his leg up to kick me again. Devan was laughing his ass off in the kitchen.

“Get up lazy dumb-fucks. We have to go into town and I’m sick of waiting for you.”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Devan!” All the commotion from Ethen’s yelling woke up Chris and Quinten with a moan. Quinten stretched before stumbling off the couch and into the bathroom.

“Coffee’s ready. Get up and let’s go.” Devan prodded some more.

“Yah, yah.” Ethen replied, rubbing his hands roughly against his face. “You didn’t have to make Bryson bite me. I hate it when he fuckin’ bites.”

“I know dumb shit.”

“Fuck off.”

But Devan had won the spat. Ethen peeled himself off the couch and made his way to the kitchen, grabbing the coffee pot. Chris looked groggy, but he stood up and grabbed his coat and keys. “I’m just going to head out. I’ll see you guys some other time. Goodluck tomorrow.”

“Thanks Chris.” Devan said as he disappeared through the front foot.

Quinten emerged from the bathroom and went to grab himself a cup of coffee before sitting down at the table. When he shot me a wayward glance, a look of mild surprise came over his face. “What did you do to Bryson last night?”

“Had some fun with him.” Devan said between sips of his own coffee. 

“I didn’t know you were into bloodplay.”

“Meh, who knows. I felt like it. It was fun. He whined like a good puppy; you should have heard him whimpering.”

“You know I’m not into that.” Quinten remarked nonchalantly.

“You’re no fun.”

“Whatever.”

“You should have invited me.” Ethen said, faking a hurt tone. Devan chuckled. “My puppy needed some bonding time with his Master.”

“I’ll play with him later.” Ethen said, throwing me a smirk. I pretended not to notice.

\----

Six hours later I was sitting on the couch wanting to bang my head against a wall. I was so fucking bored I couldn’t stand it. Even dogs weren’t meant to sit around day after day with limited stimulus and no purpose in life.

_Devan could at least take me for a walk like a good Master. Lazy bastard._

I jumped off the couch and walked out of the cabin and onto the porch. It was chilly outside for someone who was stark naked. Rubbing my hands briskly against my arms, I descended from the balcony and crossed the yard to the forest edge. My feet squished in the wet, muddy grass from all the rain we had received yesterday. It didn’t bother me as I crossed into the forest and brushed past the bushes and found an old game trail.

The leaves of the deciduous trees had turned varying shades of yellow, orange, and red. Many leaves scattered the ground, but some stragglers still clung to their branches high in the treetops. My boredom dissipated as I looked around the forest and examined the finer details of nature with mild fascination.

Walking down a game trail, I started thinking about what the men were planning to do tomorrow.

_They’re going to kill a man._

I knew once they came home from dumping Tanner’s body, I’d probably have a hard time for a while. A nagging dread filled my body as I wandered aimlessly down the trail. How long would it be before the guys didn’t want to take care of a whipped and beaten dog anymore? The thrill would eventually dissipate, and I’d become nothing more than a burden. Did I have days, or weeks, or months, or years? The uncertainty of my future and how things would play out troubled me.

I thought back to the words Devan had whispered to me the day I should have died. The day he should have slit my throat and left my body here in the woods. He had said they had grown to care for me. Maybe my fate wouldn’t be the same as Tanner. Maybe I would be different. Maybe I just had wishful thinking.

My best chance at escape would likely be tomorrow morning when they took me into town with them. Any normal captive would have been ecstatically awaiting the opportunity to bolt. However, I wasn’t sure I felt very keen about the idea. It didn’t feel right. The reasons were complicated. On the surface, I was hesitant because I’d failed at running before and I was genuinely terrified of what Devan might do to me should I fail at running again. Devan and Quinten were testing me, and I didn’t want to fail them. Deeper down though, I was hesitant because I was ashamed of myself. The embarrassment of my family and friends finding out what I’d become was too much for me to bare.

The game trail came to an abrupt end and disappeared into prickly underbrush. Turning around, I headed back towards the cabin. I decided to run back to clear my thoughts and warm my chilled body. My legs were stiff and awkward as I started to jog. It had been a long while since the last time I had been running.

My lungs burned and muscles ached a short distance later, revealing how out of shape I really was. My stamina was terrible, and I started walking again to catch my breath. As I headed back, I realized that I’d gone further then I’d realized. Worry started to nag at me. I hadn’t planned on being out for very long. What if Devan, Ethen, and Quinten were already back?

When I finally stumbled out of the bush and into the yard my heart sank. The SUV was parked next the cabin and the guys were already back inside. A tickling sense of fear mingled with anxiety blossomed in my chest and flowed down my limbs. I hoped and prayed they hadn’t been back for very long. 

I quickly crossed the yard and quietly climbed the steps to the front door. I suddenly didn’t know what to do. I desperately hoped that Devan was still in a good mood as I knocked on the door.

My heartbeat raced in my chest and my limbs felt rubbery as dread seeped through my veins. I knew now that I had done something bad. I had left without permission. When the door opened, I didn’t look up. I knew it was Devan. I kept my body low against the edge of the threshold and kept my eyes locked on his socks.

“Where the fuck were you?” His voice was murderous, telling me everything I needed to know.

“I… I wassss b-bored.” I stammered softly.

“You were what?”

“Bored!” I blurted louder, desperately. “Please, I was just walking in the forest.”

“Who told you that was okay?” His tone was unforgiving. He was going to make me dig my own grave.

“No…no one.” My words were weak and pathetic. “Please!” I begged, “I would never leave you!” I reached forward, my hand clutching his pant leg for forgiveness. Devan moved his leg back, tearing way from my touch. 

“You picked the wrong time to piss me off kid. Have you not been paying attention lately?” Devan reached down and grabbed the back of my collar, hulling me inside violently. I snorted as I tried to breathe through my cut-off windpipe. My arms sought out his hold on my neck, but he didn’t care. Devan hulled me to the kitchen table and yanked me up to my knees. I let out a panicked shriek as I saw what he wanted to show me.

“What is your problem Devan?” Quinten said suddenly in response to my unbridled fear, his voice coming from the living room.

“The problem is that poor Bryson here thought he could run off just because he was bored. Do I look like someone you can play games with?” I didn’t respond, I didn’t want to say anything. He shook my collar savagely, jarring my head from side to side.

“No!”

Just to make a point, Devan picked up the gun and pressed the cold metal against my head. I fully expected him to blow my brains out right here and now.

I screamed for Quinten to help me and Devan laughed, knocking the gun against the side of my head. “Do you really fucking think Quinten gives a shit about what I do to you? Do you think that just because he fucks you nicer than me or Ethen that he will save you?” I covered my ears with my hands, shutting out his horrible words. I silently begged him not to say anything more. “Please!” I started to sob. Quinten was the only comfort I had, and now Devan was trying to take that away.

I didn’t listen as Devan said something else and pulled me down the hallway towards my bedroom. My hands fell away from my ears as I scrambled across the bed and huddled in the corner of the room by the single nightstand. Ethen walked in carrying the black duffle bag. I screamed, over and over again. I didn’t deserve this. I hadn’t done anything!

“Leave me alone! I didn’t do anything!” I sobbed, “You know I didn’t mean it!”

I tried to say all the things that would make Devan forgive me. Ethen almost looked unsure of himself as he passed the bag to Devan, who took it and opened it on the bed. I watched him unzip the top and pull out a zip tie.

“S—stop.” I stuttered as Devan approached. He hulled me up by my collar to a standing position and made me face the wall. I put my hands behind my back willingly, trying to show him I was still his. He bound my wrists together tightly and then threw me backwards onto the mattress. I laid there shaking, but otherwise unmoving.

“What are you going to do?” Ethen asked, masking any emotion from his voice. For the briefest second I thought that Ethen might be worried of Devan’s intentions. Devan didn’t reply as he dug out his knife from the bag and climbed on to the bed with me. Looking down into my face, he said, “Five lines. That’s your punishment this time. Next time it will be ten.”

I didn’t move as Devan straddled my hips, pressing his weight into my body. He placed the sharp edge of the blade under the last line from the previous night and started working. I held my breath this time, more prepared for what to expect as the knife cut across my skin. I could handle the lines.

When he had finished two new rows, he stopped and regarded Ethen, who looked intrigued. “You want to do the rest?”

“Yes.” Ethen walked to the bed and they traded places.

“Don’t go deep. Enough to bleed but not cause a deep laceration. We’re not taking him anywhere to get stiches, you hear me?”

“Yes.” Ethen tried to contain a nervous excitement as he pressed the knife into my chest. I squirmed as he held the point idle against my skin. “Don’t move!” Ethen shouted, concentrating as he pushed the knife down harder, slowly drawing it across.

“You’re going too deep.” Devan said, stopping Ethen. “I’ll show you.” He closed his hand over Ethen’s grip and finished the line. “You don’t need to apply extra pressure. It’s a sharp knife, the edge will cut in and glide through the flesh as you move it across.” His tone was parental, and I felt sick as I realized Devan and Ethen were bonding like father and son. I was just a piece of meat at a butcher shop.

“Now you finish the last two lines.” Devan stated as he released his hold on Ethen’s hand.

“I never realized the blade would cut so smoothly.” Ethen started drawing the blade across and I whined, pushing my head into the bed.

“It’s worth paying extra for a good blade.”

_Only two more. Only two more. Only two more._

_Only one more. Only one more. Only one more._

Despite the fact I was holding back my cries, tears still leaked from the corners of my eyes. The stinging and burning sensations were just as intense as last night. When it was over, Ethen grinned at Devan. “That was fun.”

“Just don’t get crazy.” Devan warned. I guess he still wanted me alive. He turned me over and used the knife to cut off the zip tie when Ethen got off the bed. I laid where I was, embracing the burn as my eyes watered. Droplets of blood were swelling along the new cut lines and leaking out from the wound, sending thin bloody streaks down my chest and torso. “Get up.” He ordered. I thought he was planning on fucking me next, but instead he shoved me out of my room and towards the bathroom. “Get cleaned up and then come sit with me on the couch.” Devan said, leaving me alone in front of the sink. I grabbed a facecloth and soaked it in warm water before ringing it out and dabbing the cloth lightly against the cuts. Fortunately, they did not bleed for long.

I refused to look at Quinten as I sat down on the opposite couch with Devan. Now that he had punished me, Devan’s demeanor had changed from angry to content. He pulled me close and rubbed my head as we sat in silence.

\------

Later that night I crawled into bed beside Quinten. I didn’t curl up beside him like I usually did, seeking his embrace. I stayed on the edge of the bed, away from his touch. I flinched as he turned on his side and traced my back with his fingers.

“I do care for you Bryson.” He said softly, his voice barely audible. I felt betrayed by him again and his words just added to my sadness. When I didn’t respond, Quinten said, “Devan is possessive of you. Nothing I say would change how he treats you. If I told him to stop, he’d probably only go harder on you.”

“I thought he was going to kill me.” I blurted before I could stop myself. “You didn’t even care.” I knew I sounded like pouting child.

“I do care. Devan wasn’t going to kill you Bryson, I knew he wouldn’t.”

Silence.

“He’s been mentally preparing to kill Tanner tomorrow. You not being here when he got home just added to his stress. We didn’t know where you had gone off to. I know he’s been nicer to you lately, and you know it too.”

I nodded my head against the pillow in defeat. I knew he was right.

“I’ve told you before that you’re not my friend Bryson. I care for you, yes. But you can’t look at me with those heartbroken eyes and expect something different from me.”

I felt my chest constrict as I fought back a sob.

“Come here. Lay with me.” Quinten soothed, his calming voice heeding me to obey. I gave in, turning into his embrace. His warm legs wrapped around mine, locking us together. His gentle thumb traced the outline of my face in the darkness. I felt his soft, perfect lips press lightly against my forehead before he turned out the light and we drifted off to sleep.


	19. Going into Town

I woke up earlier then usual to the sound of heavy footfalls stomping around the cabin. Twisting around, I saw that the bed was empty beside me. Quinten had already gotten up for the day, leaving me behind to get a bit of extra sleep. Slithering across the covers, I slipped off the bed and onto the floor. Crawling on all fours, I made my way gingerly to the bathroom to relieve myself and brush my teeth before heading to the kitchen to see what was going on. Despite the fact I had been spending a lot of time on the floor, the soreness in my knees and wrists told me that I was unlikely to get used to it.

I took up my spot next to the chair were Devan usually sat. There was no one sitting around the table this morning, as all the men were busy getting ready for our trip. We were all about to head into town to buy some winter clothes, followed by the guys leaving for a no-big-deal murder in the afternoon. If I went to town with the guys, it would be my first time being in public since my abduction two months ago. My hands suddenly got clammy and my nervousness spiked. Devan obviously trusted me enough to behave, or he wouldn’t have even entertained the suggestion Quinten had made. I still felt the same way as I had during my jaunt in the woods. I remained hesitant to give the concept of escape much thought. The consequences of a failed attempt, or even causing Devan to simply doubt my loyalty would be severe. I currently felt that there was more to be gained by proving myself to them. If I refrained from trying to escape now, more opportunities could present themselves in the near future. I needed them all to trust me.

My angst therefore had little to do with me feeling the need to run away. No, my feelings stemmed from the fact that the last time I had been expected to act normal in front of strangers, it had not turned out well for me. Horrible memories of what I had been subjected to the night of the barbeque and the days following it seized my chest. My hands balled into fists on the floor. The humiliation of the punishment I had endured threatened to swallow me back into a black hole of despair. I knew I wouldn’t be able to survive anything like that again. I shook my head, trying to force the intrusive memory away.

My resignation to remain enslaved to Devan and the others was ultimately a function of my own self-loathing and fear. In part, I knew my reluctance to escape was also because I didn’t want anyone from my past life knowing the shameful acts that I was now willingly engaged in to survive. I felt like I was being torn in half. I wanted to escape this horrible existence, but I also loathed what would come from it.

My shoulders drooped as I looked at the floor.

I was so emersed in my own gloomy ponderings that I hadn’t noticed Ethen calling for me. Instead, I came back to my senses when his sneaker connected with the back of my spine. I yelped in surprise, springing forward, and smashing my forehead on the lip of the table. I clutched my throbbed head and leaned sideways to support myself.

“C’mon Bryson, you need to put some clothes on so we can go.” Ethen said annoyed, but the glint in his eyes betrayed his amusement. “Follow me.”

I followed Ethen on all fours across the kitchen and down the hallway to his room. Ethen and Devan slept in the same bed, but I was not under the impression that they slept together for sexual reasons. I had never seen or heard any indication that they had such desires for one another. I was moreover under the impression it was because the cabin only had three bedrooms and one of them was mine and the other was Quinten’s.

Once in the room, Ethen started pulling open the drawers to his dresser. I sat on the floor, leaning back against the side of his bed. A few items were tossed on the floor at my feet. “Here, try these on.” Ethen ordered. I obliged, pulling the socks over my feet before standing up. I was about to put on the underwear when Ethen motioned for me to stop. I waited as he walked quickly to the kitchen and came back with a key.

“I’ll take this off for the trip.” He stated, moving to unlock the belt around my hips that secured the cage around my dick. Once it had been removed, I resumed putting on the fresh pair of underwear. The snugness of the fabric against my skin felt foreign and uncomfortable. I leaned back down and snatched the jeans and t-shirt from the floor. I put the shirt on the bed before pulling on the jeans. They were loose-fitting, but they would stay on this time without a belt. Of all the guys, Ethen resembled my body-type the most. I put on the plain gray shirt next. When I was done dressing, I stood awkwardly in the room looking at the floor with my arms hanging at my sides.

“You’re almost ready” he remarked, moving to stand behind me. A second later I felt his fingers at the back of my neck as he worked to unlatch the leather collar. As the strap fell away, my neck felt lighter than usual. I involuntarily reached up to touch the exposed skin. I turned my head just in time to see Ethen’s brows furl. “We will have to cover up the bruising, or someone’s going to notice.”

Ethen moved back to his drawers and resumed his rummaging. When he became dissatisfied with his searching, he started looking through Devan’s dresser instead. After another minute he pulled out a black scarf. “I knew we had one somewhere.”

He walked back to me and looped the fabric snuggly around my neck. “There, now you are good to go.” My eyes shifted from the floor to Ethen’s face and then back to the floor again while rubbing my arms. I felt very unsure of myself right now. Never one for comforting words, Ethen ended our moment of awkward silence by turning around and leaving the room. I followed him down the hallway. After having been naked for so many weeks, the simple sensation of fabric rubbing against my legs as I walked felt very strange.

When we got to the front door, I realized I had no shoes. Ethen had come to the same conclusion and provided me with a pair of over-sized sneakers. “These will have to work because we don’t have anything else.”

Once I had the shoes on, which, by the way, felt even stranger than wearing clothes, I followed behind Ethen to the SUV. I could see that Devan and Quinten were already waiting in the vehicle. As I opened the side door to sit beside Quinten in the back, Ethen hopped in the front passenger seat. I saw Devan’s eyes watching me through the rear-view mirror as I sat down and buckled up.

The vehicle started a moment later and moved down the driveway. My heartbeat quickened as I watched the cabin disappear from sight. Looking out the front windshield, I could finally get a sense of where I was. We had traveled approximately 500 meters before escaping the long, forested driveway and emerged at a paved road. It was a rural area, that much was obvious. Other driveways that no doubt led to other cabins were well spaced apart, awarding a great deal of privacy to anyone who lived in this neck of the woods.

Ethen leaned forward and turned on the radio. Rock music started playing on a low volume. Even simple pleasures like listening to music were few and far between. I was lucky to watch a movie once and a while. I could sense Quinten’s gaze, and I turned to look at him. Our eyes met, and I saw a stern expression etched across his face. “We will stop at the thrift store first for clothing. I want to get you an outfit along with a sweater, jacket, gloves, and maybe shoes if time permits. Temperatures here are going to start getting really low. Even if you won’t be getting outside much, you should have something to wear just encase.”

I nodded my head in agreement. Wringing my fingers together nervously, I took the small liberty to say, “I’ve never been to Alberta in the winter before.”

“You’ve only ever lived on the west coast?” he asked curiously. I nodded my head.

“Average temperatures here will dip to -10 or -20 Celsius over the next month or so. Once winter really sets in, there will be a few weeks of -30. Hopefully, this will be an easy winter.” [note: 14 to -22 Fahrenheit]

“That really cold.” I remarked dryly.

“As I am sure you are already aware Bryson, but we are bringing you with us today because we trust that you won’t try and escape.” Quinten said, redirecting the conversation. I didn’t need to look around to know that Devan and Ethen were listening intently as well.

“I won’t try and escape, I promise.” I said truthfully.

“Good, because if any of us get any indication that you are thinking of doing or saying something to try and cause a scene or get help…”

Quinten didn’t have to finish the sentence for me to understand what the consequences would probably be.

“I won’t. I won’t try anything. I really promise.” I said earnestly, desperate for them to believe me. “I want to be good.”

“Happy to hear that.” Devan said from the driver’s seat. Quinten reached over and pulled me closer to his side. I leaned into his body and breathed in his comforting scent. About ten minutes later the forest disappeared as the landscape transitioned to open fields where barren cropland and cattle pasture quickly became the new normal.

As we neared the town, I pushed away from Quinten to get a better look out the window. Billboards along the HWY answered my question as to where we were headed: Grande Prairie. I wondered if my family had thought to look for me around here. The guys had never once mentioned anything about the police or my family investigating my disappearance. A small part of me really wished that I could at least know if they were still actively looking.

It hit me hard, thinking about mom and dad and how much I missed them. Just a few months ago I had been eager to leave home and put the west coast far behind me. I had hated their relentless nagging and nit picking and had wanted nothing more than to achieve my own independence. Innately, I knew that they had always done those things because they cared for me, and in hindsight I wished that I had not taken them for granted so much. I felt my eyes getting watery as a pang of sadness and deep longing filled my chest. I didn’t think that I would ever see them again, and I mourned their loss as much as they must have been mourning mine. I was happy that they would only have fond memories to look back on. If, or when, I was eventually killed, I hoped that they would never have the chance to know what had been done to me. I refused to cry as tears threatened to spill down my cheeks; I locked away my emotions by digging my fingernails into the palm of my hands. I didn’t have the luxury of being able to miss my parents and reminisce about what my life used to be like. If I dwelled on it for too long, I would lose my resolve. I couldn’t afford that right now.

Grande Prairie was a hub of activity, a stark contrast to the quiet rural countryside just outside the city. As we drove in on HWY 43, we passed by stores, restaurants, and office buildings. Everything just seemed… so normal. Being here made me feel like I was living in an alternate reality. Fast food joints passed us by and my mouth watered in response. I’d give just about anything right now to get a nice meal. Most people might not regard fast food as being nice, but I wasn’t about to be picky. Anything other than kitchen scraps and dog food would be a vast improvement. My stomach twisted in a knot of hunger; I hadn’t been given any food this morning.

Devan flipped on the turn signal and a few seconds later we were swinging left into the parking lot of a strip mall. The parking lot was partially full, and Devan chose to park closer to the back of the lot where there were more open spaces. When we came to a full stop, I took in a deep breath and unbuckled my seatbelt. We all opened our doors at the same time and I gingerly stepped out, taking in my surroundings. I immediately saw how easy it would be to start running and calling for help. There were enough people around that the ruckus wouldn’t go unnoticed this time. I was conflicted by what to do. The guys waited, knowing all too well that I was waging an internal battle with myself as I held onto the open door of the SUV and gazed longingly at people walking down the sidewalk. Devan, Ethen, and Quinten were silent, watching me intently. I slowly released breathed out and closed the door. I felt tired and disheartened as I closed the door and lifted my head to meet Devan’s gaze. I just didn’t have the will to try and fight him. His piercing stare and rigid posture relaxed in response to my behaviour. He was seemingly satisfied with the resignation he saw reflected in my eyes. He knew I wasn’t going anywhere.

“Come on” Devan said, waving me over to him. “Let’s go.”

I nodded, only slightly dragged my feet as I followed the trio across the parking lot towards the store. When we stepped inside, the smell of musty clothes and old books filled my nose.

“Stick with me Bryson.” Quinten said, motioning for me to follow him to where the men’s shirts were located. I obliged, not knowing what I was allowed or not allowed to do. I didn’t dare assume anything.

“You’re probably a size small. Pick a couple things from these wracks to try on.”

I found myself looking for Devan, instinctively wanting to get his approval first. But Devan was in another aisle and not paying attention to me anymore. Turning to the task at hand, I was quickly able to tune out my surroundings and not worry about the lingering stares of other shoppers. I grabbed a few shirts and steered clear of the ones with cheesy logos and quotes. As I found a some to try on, Quinten led me around to the pants section next where I grabbed a few different options. With an armload of clothes, we moved over to the fitting rooms. I picked an open stall and closed the door. Inside the cramped space there was a body-length mirror, a stool, and a couple hooks for hanging clothes. I hung up the items and peeled off my own garments, striping down to my underwear and socks. As I stood up from removing my pants, I saw my full-body reflection in the mirror. I grimaced at the sight of myself. I was hardly recognizable anymore. I looked just like the beaten and crestfallen animal that I had come to feel like on the inside. The series of fresh cut marks across my chest that were scabbed over and slightly enflamed were vivid against my pale white and undernourished body. I was covered in bruises at varying stages of healing, and scares marred much of my skin. I turned around to look over my shoulder at my back. I saw the scar tissue from the bullet wound and the not-so-elegant carvings Devan had etched into my skin. Seeing myself fully in the mirror made me realize how much pain and suffering I had physically, and not just emotionally, endured in such a short amount of time. Even though I didn’t feel it, I was stronger than I gave myself credit for. 

Not wanting to make Quinten wait too long, I started trying on the clothes and quickly whittled down the pile to just a few items. Opening the door and stepping out, I handed Quinten the ones that would work. I had chosen two t-shirts, one dark gray and the other light blue. For pants, there was one pair of dark wash navy jeans.

“This is good, let’s see if they have any coats and shoes.” Quinten said, leading me over to the winter wear section. There were only a couple jackets to pick from, none of them stylish in any sense of the word. I tried on the one that looked the warmest, a dingy brown puffy coat that was meant to help ward off wind chill. “This one will work.” I said to Quinten, and he nodded his head in approval.

When we got to the shoe wrack, I could see that there were a couple boots and some sneakers in my size, which was nine and a half. I reached for a pair of winter boots that were a few inches above the ankle in height and tried them on. They wouldn’t be the warmest, but they would suffice. I thought we had everything that we had came for, but then Quinten reminded me that we also needed to get gloves, scarves, and a toque. It turned out that those items were towards the front of the store. Quinten picked out some for the both of us.

Finished with our shopping, I followed Quinten over to the cashier’s desk. He put all of our stuff on the counter and the young woman behind the till got to work scanning each item. As she finished scanning the last item, she regarded us cautiously. I could tell she didn’t quite know what to make of us. We weren’t exactly a very approachable looking bunch. I mostly kept my eyes adverted towards the floor.

“It will be… uh, $26.00 please.” She stated. Quinten reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. Flipping through it, he fished out some bills and handed them over. After the woman returned his change, she bagged our items and handed them back across the counter. I took one bag and Quinten took the other.

Looking around the store, I could see Ethen and Devan were not finished looking for themselves yet. Quinten signaled that we would wait back at the vehicle. Exiting the store, we crossed back across the parking lot to the SUV. I put my bag down on the ground by the side door. Quinten didn’t have the keys to unlock it, so we just stood up front by the hood. As I leaned casually against the vehicle, I observed Quinten. I could see that there was something he wanted to say, but neither of us spoke at first.

“Thank you for the clothes” I said suddenly, feeling the need to break the silence.

“You’re welcome. It will be Devan that dictates when you can wear them though, so don’t get too excited.”

“I’m not.” I said in a soft, somewhat deflated tone.

“For being on good behaviour, I’ll let you ask me something. So, hurry up before Devan and Ethen get back.” Quinten said suddenly. His voice told me that he was unsure if he was making the right decision by offering me this opportunity. I licked my lips nervously. I trusted Quinten the most, but I didn’t know if what I wanted to ask would make its way back to Devan and Ethen. I didn’t want to get in trouble, but at the same time I didn’t want to forgo a rare opportunity to get answers.

Gathering my inner strength, I asked, “was my disappearance in the news? Is anyone still looking for me?”

“I thought you might want to know that.” Quinten muttered, kicking a small stone with his shoe. His tone turned serious. “Never ask something like that with Devan or Ethen around.”

“I know.” I said softly, shifting my eyes away. There was a moment of silence as Quinten thought about his next words. “The guys and I paid attention to the media fairly closely in the first few weeks after we had taken you. You made headlines maybe three or four times as the cops asked for the public’s help finding out what happened that night. But we were confident that there had been no witnesses and not much for them to go on evidence wise. The stunt you pulled at the hotel might have given us away, but nothing ever came of it. It has only been a couple months, so I am sure you’re still an open case in their books. But I suspect they’re not putting many resources into looking for you anymore.”

He spoke about it casually, not expressing any concern that the cops or anyone else for that matter would ever find out what had happened to me. His matter-of-fact tone solidified my fears that I was in this alone. I nodded my head, “I suspected my chances were low.” I said, crestfallen and sad.

“If you’re still thinking about being rescued, why aren’t you running now?” Quinten asked bluntly.

“I…” I started, and then struggled to find my next words. “I am broken.” My voice cracked as I spoke quietly, angling my body away from him. I had so much more to say, but the words were locked in my chest. Some things were just not meant to be spoken.

We stood in silence as Devan and Ethen returned to the SUV. Their loud talking and heavy footfalls warning me of their approach well in advance. As they arrived and Devan unlocked the doors, I picked up my bag and climbed back into the vehicle.


	20. The Job

It was probably just before noon when we got back to the cabin. I mounted the steps of the deck and walked through the front door after Devan, setting the bag I had been carrying on the table. The ride back had been quiet. At the beginning, the guys had gone over their plan once again for murdering Tanner, leaving everyone subdued; the seriousness of their task becoming more real now that it was time to carry out their plans. Quinten had about an hour before he was supposed to leave to go pick up Tanner for the “job” that they were going to do for Chris and Bill today. Unfortunately for the junkie, he’d never be making it back to his house again if everything went accordingly.

I walked over to the couch and sat down, folding my hands in my lap as I watched the men with guarded eyes. I knew Devan would be transitioning into a tense, dangerous mood right now. He was no doubt mentally preparing for what he would be needing to do in the coming hours. Ethen seemed to be experiencing a rare case of anxiousness, pacing around the house and being fidgety. For needing to do the front-end work, Quinten seemed to be surprisingly relaxed. He chilled on the opposite couch in the spot he usually claimed as his own, playing a game on his cellphone.

Devan opened the fridge and pulled out some fixings and started making sandwiches. I was starving, but I already knew he wouldn’t be making one for me. Regardless, I needed to indicate to him that I also needed food. I slid off the couch and onto the floor and carefully approached Devan in the Kitchen. I crawled up and sat beside him, waiting for him to acknowledge me. After a prolonged moment he did, looking down and saying, “What do you need?” I pointed to my food bowl on the floor. “Sure” he replied.

He paused his sandwich making to take out the bag of dog food under the sink and dumped a pile in my bowl. As I ate, I pretended that the smell of roast beef, mayo, and cheese was coming from my meal. It took a lot of resolve to not immediately harbour angry feelings towards Devan for making me eat dog food again. I felt like I deserved to also get a sandwich after proving my loyalty to him this morning. I had had an opportunity to escape, and I hadn’t tried to take it. Why couldn’t he acknowledge that and treat me better?

Devan had finished making sandwiches by the time I finished my food and had lapped up some water to help digest the dry meal. He and the guys were all sitting on the couches eating. I crawled over and climbed onto the couch beside Devan, sitting on the cushions with my arms wrapped around the front of my legs. Resting my chin on my knee, I stared vacantly at the opposite wall, trying not to think about how much I just wanted to snatch the food right out of his hands.

When Devan was done eating, he leaned forward and set his plate on the coffee table before leaning back into the couch.

“How are you feeling about things Quinten?” He asked in a measured tone.

“I’m good actually. I don’t think we’ll have much to worry about. I have done errands with Tanner before, so I know a bit about him. Once we’ve finished dropping off the drugs at the address Bill gave me, I’ll say I need to stop by my place first before taking him home. Lucky for us, the cabin is on the way back to his place, so it won’t seem unusual.”

“Chris has been working on an alibi just encase we need one.”

“Yeah, I trust Chris to keep his word. He’ll cover our backs. Anyway, I am heading out in a few minutes. Should be back in maybe an hour and a half, two tops.”

“We’ll be ready.”

About five minutes later Quinten peeled himself off the couch and headed to the washroom before leaving. Once he was out the front door and the sound of the SUV had faded into the distance, a quiet hush fell over the cabin. I had a pretty good idea of what was instore for Tanner once he got brought back here, and I wished I didn’t have to be around for it.

Devan and Ethen seemed spaced out, hard expressions resting on their faces. Not wanting to sit frozen on the couch anymore, I decided it was probably best for me to slink off to my room. I started moving away when Devan suddenly grabbed hold of my shirt and tugged me back. I fell limply back into the couch cushions.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asked. His voice wasn’t angry, so for that I was grateful.

“I was going to my room.” I replied cautiously.

“I want you here.”

I nodded my head so that Devan knew I would obey. He leaned towards me then, sitting more upright on the couch and reached up to grasp my jaw. He pulled my face around, so that I was forced to look at him. His grip was firm, but not aggressive.

“You did good today Bryson.” I nodded my head against his hand in acknowledgement.

“I knew you were thinking of running when you got out of the vehicle, but you made the right choice.”

“Yes” I replied quietly, adverting my gaze. He shook me a bit, making me look at him again.

“Your life is here with us, and I can see that you have come to accept that, at least for now.”

Devan’s blue eyes examined my own as he tried to read my emotions. I remained as neutral as possible, my heartbeat quickening. His thumb stroked my cheek.

“When Quinten get’s back with Tanner, I want you to come with us to the lake.”

“Please, let me stay here.” I immediately pleaded.

“No.” His voice was stern.

I should have kept my mouth shut, knowing anything I said would only make my situation worse. If Devan had decided something, there was no way I could change his mind. He hated being questioned or defied. I couldn’t help myself though; speaking quickly I said, “You know that I will stay with you. I want to be good. Please. I don’t need to come with you. I can stay here and watch the house.”

“You are coming Bryson, whether you like it or not. It is the only way of making sure you truly understand what I am capable of and what will happen to you should you ever change your mind about trying to get help or run away.”

“I… I do know what you are capable of. How could I not?” I talked back; a rare display of courage brought about by my disbelief. How could he think that I didn’t know? It’s not like I hadn’t already lived through two months of torture and humiliation for his pleasure. There was also the day that he had carried me out to the woods behind the cabin. He had laid me down on the forest floor amongst the leaves and placed his hunting knife to my throat. I knew perfectly well the threat he posed to my life. I didn’t need to witness him murder Tanner to explicitly know that to the core of my being.

No. I think Devan knew full well that I knew what he was capable of. He wanted me to come and lay witness to his actions for a more sadistic reason, whether he was willing to admit it or not. He thoroughly enjoyed watching me suffer. My compliance, to some extent, was probably starting to bore him. He would never say it, but for as much as he seemed to hate it when I made mistakes, he drew great pleasure from the opportunities to punish me. Fucking a willing animal wasn’t nearly as exciting as fucking an animal you also had an excuse to brutalize, especially when you happened to be a sadist. Devan was truly a twisted person and my compliance would likely never be enough to keep him satisfied. I would get to live longer by being the animal Devan wanted me to be, but eventually the outcome would be the same. It didn’t matter whether or not I was good. The only variable I got to control was how fast I wanted to meet my end: prolonged or quick.

Devan smirked at my last remark, watching me grapple with my inner thoughts. His sly smile confirmed what I had come to suspect. I was already in such a lowly place both physically and emotionally that my despair couldn’t make me sink down any lower. My fate had been sealed since the moment they took me from the rest stop in the mountains. Knowing this, would I continue to let them use me? Or should I attempt to regain some semblance of my honor and self respect by defying them to the bitter end? I was utterly ashamed of who I currently was and what they had done to me, but I didn’t have to die willing to accept that shame.

A chill came over my body at the thought of trying to resist Devan deliberately by fighting back or attempting to escape again. My death may be inevitable, but it didn’t mean I wanted to live out the rest of my days in absolute agony. The thought of standing up to Devan and going out fighting to regain my pride sounded nice, but the reality of what that truly meant was unfathomable. I didn’t know if I had it in me, at least not right now. I was just so tired. I needed the small amounts of reprieve I was awarded with good behaviour to help regain my strength and fortitude if that was the path I ultimately decided to take. 

“Go get me your collar.” He ordered, and I immediately obliged. Getting off the couch, I decided to walk instead of crawl down the hallway to where Ethen had left it on their bed. Devan’s tone didn’t give me the impression he wanted to wait very long. Snatching the brown leather collar from the bed, I returned and placed it in Devan’s open palm. 

“Get on your knees.”

I quickly descended to the floor before him, my hands hanging limp at my sides. He reached around my neck and fastened the collar snuggly. The simple leather strap was the ultimate symbol of his control over my body.

“Undo my jeans, you know what to do.”

I licked my dry lips, preparing to complete the task before me. I could do it. I had done it so many times now that I knew what to expect. I knew how long it took between unzipping the fly and having his hot cum shoot down the back of my throat. My body caried out the necessary motions for pleasing Devan while my mind shut down and tried to ignore what was happening.

My fingers worked to unbutton his jeans and unzip his fly while he re-positioned himself on the couch to get more comfortable. Working his cock out of the folds of his underwear, I could see he was already getting hard. I leaned forward, taking him into my mouth. I swirled his dick around using my tongue and sucked hard, teasing him into full arousal. Devan moaned, pushing his hips forward and I took him to the back of my throat. I could only hold it for a few seconds before I gagged and drew back; saliva flooded my mouth, coating his dick and running down my chin. I repositioned to suck on him again, pulling on him and working his shaft with the flat surface of my tongue. He moaned again as I moved my head up and down vigorously. Growing impatient, he put his right hand on the back of my head and held me down on his cock while he thrusted into my throat. I gagged and choked, and tears leaked involuntarily from my eyes. I moved my hands up to Devan’s knees, digging my fingers into his thighs as I struggled to cope with my nausea. I didn’t have much longer to wait before he forced me to deep throat-him one final time. His body tensed and I could feel his cum sliding down my throat. I licked my saliva off of his spent cock as he lifted his hand from my head.

Sinking down to the floor, I slumped against the couch between his legs and rested my head against his knee. Closing my eyes, I willed my stomach to settle so that I wouldn’t puke on the floor.

“Good job puppy.” Devan remarked, patting me on the head after he’d shoving himself back into his jeans.

I had all but forgotten Ethen’s presence on the opposite couch. I realized he was sitting there watching us when I heard him working his own cock. He’d evidently been turned on by the blowjob I had just given Devan. When we made eye contact, I knew he was planning on using me next. Ethen got off the couch, his long, skinny sword swinging out in front of him. I pulled myself back up to my knees as Ethen stood before me. He slapped me in the face with his shaft, pre-cum smearing across my cheek. I didn’t hesitate to lick him and bring him into my mouth, wanting the ordeal to be over as soon as possible. The better I got at giving blowjobs the faster they went. Ethen put his hands on his hips, looking down at me while I worked him. I closed my eyes and bobbed until I could feel him tensing, upon which I pulled him in deep, letting his cum shoot down my throat. Doing this served more than one purpose. For starters, they always liked it and secondly, it meant I didn’t have to taste as much of it.

Now satisfied, both Devan and Ethen returned to playing on their phones as I stumbled to my feet and made my way to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and washed my face, trying to get the smell and feeling of them off my skin. I formed a cup with my hands to help catch the cold water coming out of the tap and drank readily. A few minutes later my stomach had settled down and I was starting to feel clean again.

Leaving the washroom, I went to my own bed, climbed in, and huddled under the thin blanket to self reflect on my situation. I had been naïve to think Devan could be satisfied with my cooperation. I felt a pang of regret for not running when I had had the chance in the parking lot. Perhaps, had I known I would be forced to be apart of something truly evil, I’d have made a different choice. I had let my overwhelming sense of humiliation and cowardice stop me from escaping this place. Did I truly prefer suffering and death over living with shame? While I might be able to escape physically, mentally I knew a significant part of me would always remain trapped here in this cabin. The memories would plague me for the rest of my life. Would there be a point in the future that I could come to accept them and move on?

\-------------------

Forty-five minutes later Ethen appeared in the doorway to my bedroom and told me to come out and get ready to leave. I pulled the blanket from my body and followed him to the kitchen table. Devan had emptied the contents of the thrift store bags onto the tabletop.

“Put on some warmer clothes, we could be out late tonight.”

I reached for the toque, gloves, and jacket that Quinten had bought for me earlier in the morning. I put the jacket on and then stuffed the accessories into the pockets for later.

I had just finished putting my boots on when the sound of an approaching car became audible. All three of us turned towards the window at the same time. I sat down on the chair at the kitchen table wanting to stay out of the way as much as possible. When the SUV pulled up outside the cabin a minute later, the engine was turned off and both the men got out. Quinten casually walked up to the cabin as Tanner took the opportunity to have a smoke. As the front door of the opened, Quinten said “Okay, ready to go when you are.”

“We’re ready” Devan replied, referring to himself and Ethen. The three men excited the cabin at the same time and moved towards the SUV. Tanner waved, saying hello and they all started conversing normally. I didn’t want to watch, but at the same time I couldn’t look away. As Tanner came close to finishing his cigarette, I saw Ethen and Devan move to strategically position themselves around him. Tanner didn’t seem to notice, much to his detriment. When he dropped the butt of his cigarette to the ground and looked down to stomp it out, the guy’s leapt into action. In a matter of seconds, Devan had Tanner in a chokehold and was pulling him backwards towards the ground while Ethen punched him. I winced and involuntarily hugged myself as my own experience overlaid with what I was witnessing. I knew what it felt like to have someone overpower you in a chokehold; the feeling of fear building as you become lightheaded and your strength seeps away in the few moments you have left to fight back. As you lost strength, that terrifying pit of blackness creeps across your vision shortly before loosing consciousness. In those few seconds between loosing your vision and completely blacking out, you wonder if you’re really going to die.

To my own credit, I think I managed to put up more of a struggle than Tanner did. Devan and Ethen had him out cold, hog-tied, and blind folded in the back of the SUV in just a matter of minutes.

I got up from my seat and walked out of the cabin knowing it would be time to go. Quinten looked up at me then and arched an eyebrow in question. “Devan wants me to come.” I stated sheepishly, walking past him to get in the vehicle. Buckling myself in, I was acutely aware of the sound of Tanner’s steady breathing as I looked vacantly out the side window. As we departed, I had a horrible feeling that something bad was going to happen and assumed it was dread for what lay instore for both Tanner and me. Despite the fact I didn’t much care for the junkie, I would never wish this fate upon him or anyone else.


	21. The Lake

We were an hour into our two-and-a-half-hour road trip to a little-known lake that Devan was taking us to when Tanner woke up and started yelling from the trunk. I felt the back of my seat getting kicked as he squirmed in his bindings. I wished I could tell him his struggles were futile, but instead I tried to ignore him to the best of my ability. Ethen turned up the pop music playing on the radio to a near deafening level to drown out the man’s cries for help. I put my fingers in my ears and grit my teeth in frustration.

About twenty minutes later we started losing radio reception and Devan turned from the HWY onto an abandoned service road in the forest. Once we were out of view of the main road, the static noise of the radio was abruptly shut off and Devan got out of the vehicle, leaving his door hanging open. I felt my pulse quicken as he walked around to the trunk and lifted the hatch. The junkie fell silent, as if suddenly aware that he had either tested his luck a little too much or that we had arrived at his final destination.

I knew Devan was fully immersed in his darkest of moods because he didn’t say a single word to Tanner before he started beating on him. I faced forward squeezed my eyes shut, balling my hands into fists in my lap. Each impact of Devan’s fist against Tanner’s face made me feel sick. I just wanted it to stop. It didn’t take long for the Junkies’ cries to turn to whimpers and then ultimately silence. The hatch of the SUV was slammed shut and I heard the crunching of rocks under foot as Devan walked back around to his seat.

“Thanks for shutting him the fuck-up.” Ethen said, seriously annoyed. “I couldn’t fuckin’ stand it for a second longer.”

“You and me both” Devan replied.

Opening my eyes, I relaxed my shoulders as the vehicle started moving again. Quinten regarded me with a serious look on his face, his eyes guarded and withdrawn. I was startled by what I saw in his gaze. For as much as he’d always told me he wasn’t my friend, he was by far the closest thing I had to it. His gentle touch and comforting embrace at night was what I yearned for after Devan and Ethen were done with me each day. I gave Quinten my body willingly, the way he wanted it, in exchange for the illusion of kindness that he gave me.

As our gazes locked, I searched his eyes and failed to find the Quinten I knew and so desperately wanted to hold onto. Cringing, I turned my face away to look out the window instead. A lonely ache blossomed in my chest in response to his unspoken rejection. I felt very alone, trapped in a vehicle full of predators. Tanner’s beaten body in the trunk could very well be me again at any point in time. A chill ran through my body, making me shiver despite the fact I was wearing a coat and the SUV was considerably warm.

_I need to get it together. I need to stay sharp and be ready for whatever is going to happen._

Closing my eyes, I tried to slow my thinking by breathing slowly and shutting down the various threads of thought that threatened to overwhelm me. After a while, I managed to attain something akin to a meditation. Time slipped away from me and it wasn’t until I felt the vehicle leave the HWY and jostle down a bumpy, uneven two-track road that I opened my eyes and fully came back to my senses.

It was near-dark to my surprise. As winter closed in, the days were steadily becoming shorter. The remote road that we drove in on dead-ended at the shoreline of a quaint little boreal lake. The headlights of the SUV illuminated the still waters. If it weren’t for our evil presence tainting the landscape, the lake would have been beautiful and serene.

Devan and Ethen got out and Quinten motioned for me to get out as well. I opened my door and complied.

“Let’s bring him over there.” Devan said in reference to Tanner and pointed towards the shoreline of the lake. I stepped out of the way and retreated towards the darkening shadows of the nearest trees, where I hoped I could remain out of sight and out of mind.

The hatch of the vehicle lifted up, and Devan and Quinten reached in and pulled Tanner from the back of the SUV. It took both of them to drag him to the high-water line of the beach. The lake’s shoreline was comprised of fine sand and small pebbles and was maybe five meters in width. Tanner’s face was bloody, and his left eye had nearly swollen shut. Still unconscious, his head lolled to the side. I prayed silently that he would stay that way. I didn’t want him to wake up and needlessly suffer.

Devan wasn’t so forgiving. Walking back to the trunk of the SUV, he got out some of the supplies he had packed ahead of time for this trip. Taking a bucket, he filled it full of cold lake water and unceremoniously dumped it on Tanner’s head. The cold shock was enough to stir him, and I heard a loud groan escape his split lips.

“Wakie wakie sleepy-head.” Ethen teased, prying one of Tanner’s eyes open with his fingers. Tanner jerked his head back, nearly falling backwards from his kneeling position in the process.

“Pl. Pleasssee” he slurred groggily, “what did I do? I’ll fix it. I promise.”

“You’re way past that stage Tanner. You’ve been stealing drugs from Bill for months now.” Quinten said, his voice chillingly cold.

“I’ll pay it back. I swear! I was always going to!”

“Shut the fuck up. I didn’t drive all the way out here to listen to you plead your case.” Devan said.

For a prolonged moment there was complete silence.

“Well… what do you mean?” Tanner said, his voice was slow and quivering before growing into a heightened pitch. “You’re not going to kill me, right? This is a joke, right? I mean, it’s just some freaking drugs! I will pay them back! I’ll do whatever it takes! Jesus Christ. You’ve made your point bringing me out here man!”

I saw Devan pull out his long hunting knife, the same one he had almost used on me so many weeks ago. I shuddered as a wave of dread washed through me.

“Hold him.” Devan barked at Ethen, who was already obliging. Looking around, Devan squinted his eyes and found me lurking in the shadows of the forest. “Quinten, can you go get Bryson and bring him over here for me?”

Quinten turned and looked for me before starting to walk over. I saw the detached expression on his face and knew instinctively he would not be looking out for me tonight. I backed up, stumbling over a tree root in the process.

“Don’t you dare make me chase you Bryson. Come here.” Quinten said harshly. I hardly recognized him right now. This wasn’t the Quinten I knew.

“I… I don’t know what you want with me.” I pleaded. I was scared and sounded no doubt just as pathetic as Tanner did right now.

“That shouldn’t matter, now come here!” he yelled at me, growing angrier at my hesitation. I stepped towards him despite every bone in my body telling me not to. When I got within reach, he grabbed my arm and roughly tugged me over to the beach.

“What do you want with him?” Quinten asked Devan, annoyed.

“He can sit here and watch. He’ll have a front-row seat. Don’t let him run off.” Devan said, turning his attention back to Tanner. Quinten put his hand on my shoulder, forcing me down to my knees. I made the mistake of making eye contact with Tanner as we sat across from each other. His expression of pure anguish would be seared into my memories for the rest of my life. I wished my own expression could offer him some level comfort, but I knew it didn’t; I was also terrified, and it showed.

“Now, where were we?” Devan asked. It was a rhetorical question.

“I don’t want to die.” Tanner said, starting to cry. His raw emotion filled my chest with grief that I couldn’t contain, and I found myself unable to hold back my own tears.

“Life isn’t always about what you want.” Devan said, a hint of bitterness in his tone. “Don’t make this harder for yourself. Begging won’t work, as Bryson here can attest.”

“Look, I will move away. You guys will never have to see me again. Just let me go. Just don’t do this, please! You don’t need to do this to me.” He begged anyway.

My chest heaved as my sobs grew in intensity, and I tried to stifle the sound to the best of my ability. Devan stood before Tanner, the knife in his firm grasp. I could sense that he was hesitating. There was no reason to prolong the suspense any longer. I found it hard to imagine that cold-blooded murder would be difficult for Devan, but evidently it was to some degree. Despite the fact that he had killed before and had beaten and tortured people, even he needed to build up resolve for the heinous act he was about to commit.

As the moment stretched out before us and Tanner’s cries grew in intensity, the waiting became unbearably torturous. Devan’s shoulders knotted with tension.

“Just get it over with.” Quinten suddenly ordered harshly.

Spurred on by Quinten’s words, Devan moved rapidly, bending down onto one knee as he thrust the knife into Tanner’s stomach in one fluid motion. I watched, shell-shocked as the knife was tugged free and re-plunged into his sternum. Tanner sagged forward, doubling over with the force of the stabbing. I watched, unable to turn away as he struggled fruitlessly in the sand. Devan plunged the knife down again and again. With Tanner’s hands tied behind his back, he was unable to present any kind of self-defence. Tanner’s shrieks were defending, and I covered my ears with my hands in an attempt to hide from the sound. Ethen stumbled backwards and fell on his ass, overcome by the horror of what he was witnessing. Apparently talking tough wasn’t the same as being tough.

After the fifth or sixth stab, all I could see was blood. It was everywhere. Leaning forward, I dry heaved as nausea overcame me.

I had no idea how long it took for someone to die. I thought Tanner would have died quickly, but I was wrong. Devan must have stabbed him well over ten times before he suddenly stopped. He dropped the knife into the sand as he stood up and wandered over to the water, falling to his knees at the edge of the lake. He was covered in blood splatter from head to toe. He put his arms in the water, trying to wash the crimson from his hands and face.

The sound of coughing and gurgling quickly drew my attention back to Tanner, who was struggling to breathe. He no doubt had a collapsed lung and was bleeding out quickly, but not quickly enough. I looked up to Quinten, horrified by the situation. “Please, end it!” I exclaimed with desperation; I couldn’t stand to have Tanner’s suffering drawn out for so long. But Quinten didn’t seem to feel the need to finish what Devan had started. I looked to Ethen next, “please, someone!” I screamed. But Ethen was as white as a ghost and unmoving. 

Motivated by panic and an overwhelming sense of responsibility to do something, I lunged forward and out of Quinten’s reach. Picking up the knife where Devan had dropped it, I grabbed Tanner by his hair and roughly arched his head backwards, exposing his neck. Before I had a chance to second guess my actions, I viscously sliced the knife across his throat with as much force as I could muster. The knife parted the flesh of his windpipe with slight resistance. The sensation was something akin to cutting a thick chicken breast with the wrong type of knife. Except chicken breast didn’t squirt blood at you when you ruptured a major artery.

No longer able to breathe, I watched Tanner’s eyes widened with panic as the last bits of air escaped his lungs through the slit in his throat. My tears clouded my vision before falling upon his face. “I’m so sorry.” I said softly, my voice trembling as I gently cradled his head in my lap. I knew he was finally gone when his shaking stopped. His suffering was over and that’s all I cared about. “Your pain is gone now.”

I was staring absently into Tanner’s face, unable to move, when Quinten came over and carefully pried the knife from my rigid fingers. He tossed it away into the sand and hulled me backwards by my armpits to the lake’s waters. I wasn’t very responsive as he tried to get me to wash my hands. I was in shock, the gravity of what I had just done hitting me hard.

“I didn’t want him to suffer.” I said to nobody in particular.

“I know Bryson.” Quinten said quietly, giving up on trying to wash the blood. “Go sit in the vehicle.” He ordered. In response, I shakily got to my feet and wandered over to the SUV in a daze.

All three guys had expressions of disbelief plastered across their faces as I stumbled away.

\---------------------------------------

It had been about thirty minutes since I had come back to the vehicle. I sat in the back, leaning against the window, watching as the men dealt with Tanner’s body. The headlights of the SUV illuminated the shoreline, allowing me to make out what they were doing in the darkness. They had wrapped the body in some type of black cloth and were now affixing weights to the covering. I knew it was to ensure the body didn’t float to the surface when they put him in the water.

If it weren’t for the blood staining my hands and clothes, it would’ve been easy for me to believe that it was all just a bad dream. But it wasn’t. I had helped kill Tanner whether or not that was how I felt about it. In the eyes of the law, I was probably now a murderer. I looked down at my shaking hands. I had no idea I was capable of such a thing. I had never killed anything with my own hands before.

It was only a matter of time before it was my life being extinguished next. I didn’t want to live the next weeks or months in prolonged fear of being killed the same way Tanner had died tonight. He had died an awful, brutal death. I wanted this nightmare to be over. It all needed to end tonight. I was either going to escape right now or die here with Tanner. 

My level of resolve was unwavering as I gingerly worked my way to the front driver’s seat of the SUV. Sitting down, I kept a careful eye on the men as I adjusted the mirrors. I thought about how I was going to get out of here. Unfortunately, I hadn’t paid much attention on the drive in; I didn’t have any concept of where we were. Instead, I decided to focus on the present, the one variable I could control right now.

After assessing my surroundings, I determined that I’d need to turn the vehicle around in what was a narrow opening. It definitely wasn’t going to be easy to try and get out of here; I’d have to make a several-point turn to get the vehicle facing in the right direction. It was hard to know if I’d be able to do it before the guys got to me, but it was a risk I was now willing to take.

Pursing my lips in determination, I turned the key that had been left in the ignition and the SUV roared to life. The engine was so much louder than I had ever remembered it to be. My anxiety and adrenaline spiked as I heard Devan shout to Quinten and Ethen. They had been immediately alerted by the sound, and I saw all three guys dropped what they were doing with Tanner’s body and started running in my direction. I shifted the vehicle into reverse and backed up, the SUV jerking in response to my sudden pressure on the gas. Shifting the gears back into drive, I corrected and then backed up again.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” I yelled to myself, I needed out of here now!

I shoved the gears back into drive and reverse one more time before I was finally in the clear. The guys were nearly at the vehicle when I stepped on the gas and lurched forward. My heart almost exploded as I began to drive away. My sense of accomplishment only lasted mere seconds however, before shots rang out. The back window shattered as the first bullet hit the SUV. I heard several more shots and then the vehicle veered sharply to the left as the back-driver’s side tire was hit. I instantly knew my chances of getting out with the vehicle had gone down to zero. With a flat tire I wasn’t going to be going anywhere.

I threw the door open and started running down the dirt road as fast as I could. I was unwilling to give up easily this time. I was going to go out fighting. This was my once chance to find redemption.

I was so terribly out of shape from being confined for so many weeks that my lungs and legs were burning after only 150 yards. My sides cramped and I could barely catch my breath, but I knew what was at stake if they caught me. My adrenaline allowed me to push myself harder than I had ever gone before.

After another 200 yards I was compelled to look behind me, to see who it was chasing me. It was Ethen, full on sprinting and quickly covering the distance between us. Fear washed through me and gave me an extra jolt of stamina as I ran even harder. But even adrenaline and fear could only propel my body so much. As fatigue began to build up in my chest and legs, I could feel myself beginning to slow. “No!” I cried out breathlessly. Why did things have to end this way? Why did I have to be so fucking, goddamn unlucky?

The sounds of Ethen’s footfalls became louder as he came up behind me. I refused to stop running, even as my limbs dragged with exhaustion. When Ethen did finally catch up with me, he shoved me hard, causing me to lose balance just enough that he could tackle me to the ground. We landed hard on the dirt road in a sprawl of limbs. Twisting around immediately, I struggled to get back up. As I got to my knees, Ethen grabbed the hem of my jeans and tugged me back down again. As a result, Ethen was able to push himself off the ground first and he kicked me hard in the back. Pain shot up my spine, causing me to gasp. Despite the discomfort, I quickly rolled away and got to my feet. Instead of running away, I ran forward, bowling straight into him. I knew if I ran, he would simply catch me again.

We both fell to the ground again, twisting and turning in the dirt, each of us trying to get the upper hand. While Ethen and I were of similar size, he was stronger and more fit. I tried to punch him in the face, but my movements were too slow and predictable; he blocked me with his forearm. As anger and desperation took over, I tried everything I could to overpower him. I bit the arm he was using to hold me down, which caused him to rear back and let me go. But instead of providing me with an opportunity to escape, he punched me in the side of the head.

I paused for the briefest of moments, trying to straighten out my senses as my head swam. Ethen used that moment of vulnerability to bend forward and wrap his hands around my neck. As he squeezed my throat, I reached up and grabbed his ear, violently twisting it and pulling to the side. Ethen yelled and fell over, releasing his hold on my neck. 

Stumbling, I got to my feet unsteadily and tried to get further down the road. I only made it a few steps before Ethen kicked out the back of my legs and sent me flying forward back into the dirt. My hands scraped against the ground and pebbles and pine needles embedded into my raw flesh. I hardly felt the sting as I fought for my life.

I quickly flipped over onto my back and kicked Ethen in the stomach as he came at me. He gaged, doubling over. But even still, it wasn’t enough to deter him; he savagely threw my legs aside the next time I tried to kick him.

“I’m fucking done with you Bryson, you fucking piece of shit!” He yelled at me through laboured breathing. His anger was palpable, and he used his superior position over me to kick me in the junk. I immediately lost all will to continue fighting as I curled up into a fetal position, not able to move a muscle as pain radiated from by nuts. Having zero sympathy, Ethen climbed on top of me, punching me in the face and forcing me to straighten out underneath him until I was laying on my back. He maneuvered himself to sit on my lower chest, pinning my body and arms underneath his weight. I struggled weakly against his hold as his body squashed my diaphragm, making it almost impossible to breathe.

“I. I. I can’t breathe.” I said breathlessly, panicked.

“Fuck you Bryson.” Ethen spat at me. 

I stilled, trying to suck in air in short spurts, gasping like a fish out of water. It didn’t help I was also extremely winded.

I could now hear more footfalls as Devan and Quinten finally caught up to us.

“Good thing you can run fast Ethen” Devan stated, breathing hard.

“He put up a good fight this time, didn’t know he had it in him.” Ethen said, his voice steadier now that he’d had a chance to catch his breath.

“Move aside.” Devan ordered him, eager to get his chance at me.

“Probably not a good idea just yet.” Ethen said, “do you have any bindings?”

“Just my belt.” Devan said through gritted teeth. He was so angry I could hear the shake in his voice. He removed his belt and signalled to Ethen to let up his hold on me. They needed to turn me over onto my stomach to tie my hands behind my back. As Ethen lifted himself up, I squirmed vigorously, trying to use the little bit of wiggle room to escape. Devan walked around to my head and grabbed my collar, reefing on it harshly until he was able to force me to turn over. I had to comply simply to avoid getting my neck broken. Once I was on my stomach the belt was looped horribly tight around my arms. When Devan and Ethen were satisfied that I wouldn’t be able to get out of the bindings, they stood up, looking down at me on the ground.

Devan used his foot to turn me on my side, and then proceeded to start kicking me viciously. I grunted with each kick, not able to recover between the blows. I heard the sickening sound of my ribs breaking and pain exploded throughout my chest. I started screaming in earnest, each kick amplifying the radiating pain.

Once Devan had tired himself out, he stopped and stumbled back a step. I whimpered, my head laying listlessly on the dirt. Everything hurt. But I knew there was more instore for me. Devan wouldn’t give me the benefit of killing me quickly. I just hoped that it would all be over soon. I wanted to be in a better place, just like Tanner was.

“Let’s get him back to the beach.” Devan said, motioning for the guys to help carry me. Devan picked up my legs while Quinten and Ethen each put a hand under my armpits and hoisted me up. The strain on my chest and torso was horrible as my muscles were stretched. I cried out the whole way back, begging them to put me down. They didn’t oblige until I had been carried all the way to the shoreline. I was thrown down roughly onto the sand, my hands crushed under the weight of my body. 

Devan left my field of vision briefly and when he came back, he waved the bloody knife covered in sand and grit in front of my face. I expected him to start stabbing me immediately, but instead he started cutting the clothes from my body. He wasn’t careful with his slashing and the knife cut numerous lacerations across my body as the fabric fell away. I didn’t bother uttering a single word as he stripped me. I knew my fate was sealed. I had made my decision.

When he was done, the only thing I was left wearing was his collar. My legs, arms, stomach, and back were all bleeding from fresh wounds. The stinging burn was horrible, but the pain in my chest from my cracked and broken ribs outcompeted it by far.

Devan grabbed me by the collar and dragged me backwards across the sand and into the lake. The frigidly cold water shocked me, instantly numbing my skin and constricting my breathing. I didn’t have time to think or even take a deep breath before my head was pushed under the water. Devan’s fingers securely wrapped around my throat, holding me firmly beneath the surface. I thrashed with my legs, but without the ability to use my arms, I was completely defenseless. Just as defenseless as Tanner had been in his final moments. Panic flooded through me as I drowned; precious amounts of air escaping my lungs and bubbling to the surface.

My resistance only hastened the process. As the oxygen in my blood became depleted, I convulsed under the water and involuntarily attempted to breathe out of sheer desperation; water burned painfully through my nose and throat and into my lungs. As the asphyxia took hold, my kicks became steadily weaker until my movements ceased altogether. I knew the end was upon me as my fear melted away and my heartbeat slowed. A calming sensation washed through me, and in my moment of death, I was at peace.


	22. Holding On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration for this chapter was found in this song: Far From Home (The Raven) by Sam Tinnesz

When some people experience death and are brought back to life, they tell of spiritual encounters with the afterlife. For some, it is the opportunity to speak with god, while for others it is the experience of becoming one with the universe. My encounter with death wasn’t anything like that. It was rather unremarkable actually, like going to sleep and waking up again without having dreamt at all; my consciousness simply ceased to exist for a period of time. Maybe that was a sign that both god and the universe had rejected me.

My body showed sings of life when I began puking up water from my mouth and nose; someone was giving me chest compressions, igniting my broken ribs on fire. My body was slow to revive, as if it were fighting against the attempt to bring me back to life via CPR. Before being drown, I had come to terms with the fact that I would probably be murdered, and it was a risk I had been willing to take for a chance at freedom. I was emotionally and physically at the end of my rope, and death was a less preferred, but alternate means to ending my own suffering. So why was I alive?

Initially, I was only able to sense that I was alive as my heart restarted and I took my first few breaths on my own. I had no awareness of what was happening or any ability to respond to stimuli. That gradually changed however as my blood became oxygenated and started circulating through my limbs and brain. My senses started to turn on one by one. At first it was just my hearing.

“I think he’s breathing again!” Ethen exclaimed, his ear to my naked chest as he looked for signs of life.

“That was a close call.” Quinten said, his voice strained, as if he was trying to mask his feelings. “You took it too far again Devan, were you wanting to kill him?”

“You know full well what he just tried to do. He would have fuckin’ taken off and left us here. Little fuck thought he could get away. After everything that’s happened since we got him, I thought we were past this stage.”

“We were past that stage with him, Devan!” Quinten barked angrily in a tone I had never heard from him before. “When Bryson and I were in the parking lot waiting for you and Ethen to get back this morning, we had a talk. I saw the resignation in him. You and Ethen had broken him. I know you saw it as well. It was bringing him along tonight that set us all back. You made him more terrified of living in fear than actually dying. You always have to squeeze him for a little bit more, you know that? You never know then to draw the fucking line. We were all happy with how things were going, you could have just fucking left it as it was.”

“Fuck off Quinten, I’ll do what I want with him.”

“To hell you will, the three of us are in this together! It’s about time you started realizing that. We all agreed to share him before you went and got possessive. I haven’t cared that much up until now, but you risked everything bringing him tonight. If he had gotten away, Ethen and I would also be paying the price for your fuckup.”

“Fine! You’re right! Is that what you want to hear?” Devan yelled back in anger. “I made a mistake. I can get things back to how they were.”

“Somehow I doubt that.”

“I’m not ready to get rid of him just yet.” He said in a deflated tone.

“None of us are.” Ethen interjected coldly. There was silence as the tension in the air started to subside.

“We’ve got work to do now. The flat tire needs changing if we ever want to get out of here; there is a spare under the vehicle. We still need to finish dealing with Tanner’s body...” Devan said warily.

“I’ll stay here with Bryson. Ethen, can you get started on the tire?” Quinten asked.

“Sure, I’ll deal with it.”

“Tanner’s body is already mostly prepped. Just stick him in the water Devan, and then let’s call it a night.” Quinten said.

As I started to regain consciousness, I could feel my aches and pains. I was soaking wet, nearly frozen, badly beaten, and bleeding. My skin was covered in goosebumps and my teeth started chattering and my breathing became laboured. I heard the sound of a zipper getting undone as Quinten took off his jacket and wrapped it around my upper body.

“Bryson?” he asked softly, shaking me lightly.

My eyelids were heavy as I tried to lift them, only managing to open them a sliver. Quinten saw that I was coming around and he ran his fingers through my hair.

“It’s okay, you’re alive.”

“No, I was supposed to die.” I croaked. The fact that I had survived was a resounding, soul-crushing defeat. They would never let my suffering end.

Quinten carefully lifted up my upper body and he hugged me softly, knowing that my ribs were injured. “You don’t need to die here tonight Bryson.”

I didn’t know why he thought that. What difference would it make, whether or not I died here tonight? Ultimately, the outcome would remain the same.

“It hurts.” I whimpered, by body wracked with agony.

“I know, Bryson. I know. Hold on okay? We’ll get you back to the Cabin and I’ll have Troy meet us there. He’ll be able to help.” His thumb stroked my cheek, almost lovingly as he tried to comfort me. Unable to fight the weight of my eyelids any longer, I quickly fell asleep.

\---------------------------------------

I was abruptly awoken as Quinten attempted to pick me up from the ground. 

“No! No. No. No!” I stuttered, alarmed and afraid as he moved me.

“Shhhh, it’s okay.” He coddled, “Ethen’s got the vehicle ready and we’re going to leave.”

“Don’t move me, please!” I cried. Quinten had an expression of grim determination on his face as he ignored me and quickly hoisted me from the ground in one rapid movement. I yelled out, but otherwise remained still, as he stumbled up the shoreline back towards the car, cradling me in his arms.

I could tell he was fatigued as he reached the trunk and tried to carefully lay me down inside. My back and knife wounds were full of sand and grit, which inadvertently helped to stem the bleeding. I laid out flat in the trunk as Quinten ran back to the shore to grab his coat. Once he’d returned, he balled it up and placed it under my head.

“Ethen, Devan, I need your coats to cover him with.”

Despite the fact the night was chill, neither of them complained as they did what was asked of them. Quinten took Devan’s jacket and laid is across my upper body, tucking it in around the sides. Quinten then did the same with Ethen’s jacket, tucking it in against my hips and thighs. The lingering body heat captured in the material helped warm my frigid skin.

“Let’s hurry and get going.” Devan remarked as he closed the hatch. I whimpered as the vehicle started moving and jostled down the dirt road and back towards the HWY. It wasn’t until the tires finally hit pavement that I quieted. A harsh, cold wind whipped through the vehicle from the shot-out back window as Devan brought the vehicle up to HWY speed. I was grateful the men had lent me their jackets. They’d no doubt be cold themselves.

As the cold air bit at my face and legs I felt myself falling back into a soul-crushing depression. I just wanted to go home. I had never wanted anything so badly in my whole life. Tears slid down the sides of my cheeks as I was consumed by utter hopelessness. I felt so alone. If there really was a god, why did he hate me so much? How could I deserve this? How could he have he have not let me escape? Why did I have to be so fucking unlucky?

I wished that I could simply will myself to die.

I prayed, sending a silent message to the universe that I was done. So utterly fucking done. I begged for heaven or hell to take me. I didn’t care which. I just didn’t want to exist for a second longer on this earth. I didn’t entertain the idea that I could somehow be rescued. I wasn’t lucky enough for that.

“I’m sorry mom, dad.” I whispered in the dark. I grieved for the pain that they must have been going through because of my disappearance, feeling in my heart surer than ever before that I’d never be able to get to them. “I should have tried harder.”

Hearing my soft mumbles, Quinten turned to look down at me from his position in the backseat. “How are you doing?” He asked.

“I don’t think I’m going to make it back.” I croaked. “Please, Quinten. After I die, tell my family. They deserve to have closure. I don’t want them to always wonder what happened to me.” My voice breaking as I spoke.

He stayed silent, not sure what to make of my request.

“Please.”

“Okay. I will find a way to tell them.” He finally said, his voice low so that Devan and Ethen would not be able to hear. While he tried to remain neutral, I saw the grief in his eyes. I knew he cared for me on some level. A level I didn’t understand. How could one be so cruel and kind at the same time?

I closed my eyes, feeling satisfied that Quinten would fulfill my last wish. I felt my spirit fading now, making my body feel hollow. I embraced the feeling, letting it gradually start to carry me away one last time.

When the sounds of a loud siren and flashing lights broke the darkness of the night, I didn’t comprehend what it could mean.

I overheard the guys talking in the car but knew their words could only be deception. 

“For fuck's sake!” Devan shouted in panic.

“What are we going to do?” Ethen asked, “we can’t outrun the police, not on this HWY. They’ll simply block the road at junction 986.”

“Fuck!”

“How many bullets do you have left Devan?” Quinten asked calmly.

“None, I used them all.”

“Then there isn’t anything we can do. You have to pull over.”

“We can’t do that, goddamnit! We just got out of prison.”

“Pull over Devan. Maybe we can talk our way out of this.”

“You know that’s not going to work.”

“Well, a chase isn’t going to be in our favour either.”

“Kill the kid.” Devan ordered darkly.

“No. I won’t.” Quinten objected without hesitation.

“Fuck you! Do it now!”

“No, Devan. There is no point. Killing him won’t help us now.”

The sound of the police siren filled the car, drowning out their voices.

Could this actually be real? The thought was like an arrow penetrating through the layers of my clouded mind. Did I dare to hope?

I felt the vehicle begin to slow and move to the shoulder of the HWY. Something deep inside me told me to hold on. To keep fighting a bit longer. My eyes remained closed, and I wasn’t sure I’d have the energy to open them even if I wanted to. I felt so close to death. It would be easy now to let go and never wake up again. This is what I had wanted, right? But for once I decided to trust the feeling welling up inside me, telling me to hold on a little bit longer.

The vehicle came to a stop and the harsh sound of the siren abruptly cut off, plunging the vehicle back into silence. Although my eyes were closed, I could see the colors of the flashing strobe lights against the back of my eyelids.

“Two cops are getting out.” Devan observed.

I could distinctly hear the sound of footfalls approaching and then an order was yelled out.

“Driver, get out of the vehicle now, keep your hands above your head!”

I heard Devan open his door, complying with their orders.

“What’s wrong officers?” He asked loudly.

“Keep your hands up!” Someone shouted sternly, ignoring him. “Now walk to towards the back of the vehicle, kneel, and keep your hands on your head.”

“Why was I pulled over?” Devan asked again, his voice closer now as he walked past.

“We have some questions about the state of your vehicle, Sir. For everyone’s safety, myself, Officer McKinnon and my partner here Officer Rickshaw will detain you and the occupants of your vehicle while we assess the situation.”

“It’s just a broken window.” Devan objected with exacerbation.

“I can see what appears to be bullet holes in the back of your vehicle. Until we know what’s going on here, you are hereby being detained.”

“Fuck!” Devan said angrily. I heard metal clinking as Devan was put in cuffs and led further away.

“How many people are in your vehicle Sir?” Officer McKinnon asked, his voice now sounding more distant.

“Two.” Devan replied.

“Stay here. Don’t move.” The cop said before I could hear him coming closer and yelling, “both occupants of the vehicle, please exit. Keep your hands on your head and walk to the back of the vehicle and kneel facing us.”

There was silence while the Quinten and Ethen complied and were put in handcuffs and similarly led a bit further away. Officer McKinnon began reading them their charter rights before starting in on his questions.

I heard footfalls near the vehicle as Officer Rickshaw wandered over to inspect the SUV. I laid silently, unmoving in the trunk as I fought to hold onto my consciousness. I was growing inexplicably tired as the moments wore on. A beam of light suddenly passed over my face as the officer looked through the broken window and peered down into the trunk with his flashlight. The beam of light was withdrawn almost as quickly as it appeared, and then I heard shouting as the cops talked with one another.

A minute later the hatch clicked unlocked before it was manually lifted. Fingers were quickly pressed to my throat as the officer checked for a pulse.

“I think he’s alive.” Officer Rickshaw said calmly before tentatively looking under the jackets that covered my body. There was silence as he assessed me visually before speaking into his radio with urgency. “We’re going to need backup, forensics, and a medivac ASAP. We have three subjects detained and one additional subject in the back of a black SUV, naked and unresponsive with multiple lacerations and extensive bruising.”

A voice crackled back over the radio. “We are sending units from the Grande Prairie District to assist, ETA two hours. Notifying the Air-Ambulance service now. Standby for ETA and further instruction.”

“What is his name?” I heard Officer McKinnon ask the men. “What is his relation to you?”

“I am not saying anything without my lawyer.” Devan stated. Ethen remained silent. It was Quinten that spoke up, “his name is Bryson.”

“Is he your friend?”

“Something like that.”

“How did that happen to him?”

Silence.

“Your friend is in bad shape. We don’t know if the medivac will arrive in time. Any information you can tell us now might save his life.”

“He was kicked and drown.” Quinten said, to which Devan told him to shut the fuck up and not say anything else. “Please, can I see him?” Quinten asked, ignoring Devan’s outburst.

“What do you intend to do?”

“I just want to talk to him.”

“Sure. Get up, walk in front of me.”

“Hey, Bryson. Can you hear me?” Quinten asked softly, coming to kneel beside the trunk. I fought to open my eyes and succeeded only for the briefest of moments. “Hold on okay? Help is coming for you. I know this is what you’ve wanted. You just need to hang in there a bit longer. Don’t give up yet.”

Despite the fact he was one of my captors, his words of comfort and reassurance helped give me the inner strength I needed to keep holding on.

“You’re going to make it back to your family.”


End file.
